Nancy: What Should We Do This Weekend?

Me, an asexual: I lied, I actually don’t like sex. Put your clothes back on. Now, I’m going to explain the entire plot of Stranger Things to you.

Ok but if this isn’t a scene in season 4 Vol. 2 I’m suing.

Robin: *runs at full speed towards Steve* *grabs him by his shirt* *throws him against a wall*

SHE KNOWS HOW TO USE A FUCKING GUN????

Steve: what?? Who? What is happening? Did the Russians get to you????

Robin: wha- no! Nancy ya dingus!!

Steve: what about her???

Robin: HAVE YOU SEEN HER USE A GUN?? SHE COULD KILL AN ANT FROM A MILE AWAY!!! AND YOU NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT TELLING ME???

Steve: okay first of all, wasn't she "a priss"? Second of all, HOW IS ANY OF THIS RELEVANT?

Robin: IT'S RELEVANT BECAUSE IT'S THE HOTTEST FUCKING THING I'VE EVER SEEN

Steve: oh my god.

Steve: Hey are you free on Saturday, 7pm?

Robin: Yeah.

Steve: Cool, how about you?

Nancy: Yes.

Steve: Sweet. I’m not, but you two have fun!

Robin: Did he just-

Robin: *Staring off into space*

Nancy: You good robs?

Robin: *Still staring into the abyss* Lasagna is just Spaghetti flavoured cake…

Nancy: *Extremely concerned but also question human existence* Ok what the fu-

Just reposting some of my art from my old account :)

Dustin: Ok, thanks dads.

Everyone: …

Dustin: Why’s everyone staring at me?

Robin: You just called Steve and Eddie your dads. You said, “Thanks dads”.

Dustin: What no I didn’t, I said thanks guys.

Steve: Do you see us as father figures Henderson?

Dustin: No! If anything I see you both as bother figures cause you’re always bothering me!

Nancy: Hey! Show your dads some respect!

Dustin: I didn’t call them my dads!

Eddie: No, no, no, Dustin, we take it as a compliment.

Mike: It’s not a big deal, one time I called El “Will”.

Dustin: Guys! Jump on that! Mike’s madly in love with will but still dating El!

Max: Old news! But you calling Steve and Eddie your daddy’s-

Dustin: Hey! Daddy is not on the table here!

Lucas: But you did call them your dads dude.

Dustin: You shut up! You’ve done nothing but lie since you got here!

Lucas: Ok I’ll admit, I stole your DnD book, but the dad thing? That happened.

Dustin: AHAH! Lucas admitted to stealing my DnD book! It was a trap! All a part of my crazy, devious plan.

Steve: We believe you.

Dustin: Thank you.

Eddie: Son, would you like to talk about it later over a, game of catch?

Dustin: …I’d like that.

Eddie, DMing a game for the Fruity Four: *BBEG voice* And now, time for the deadliest game of them all…

Robin, nodding: Knife Monopoly.

Eddie: …Actually I was just gonna send his minions to hunt you for sport but now I’m seriously interested in whatever the fück Knife Monopoly is.

Noel and Mischa: *being cute*

Constance: Aww, they’re so cute!

Penny: I would put them on a boat.

Ocean: …You mean, you ship them???

*cue Ricky just absolutely wheezing in the background*

Steve (teaching Robin how to drive): Ok, so you’re driving down the road, and all of a sudden Mike and Dustin are crossing it, what do you hit?

Robin: Oh definitely Mike. I mean Nancy might be a bit mad at me but I could never hit Dustin.

Steve, rubbing his temples: The brakes Robin. You hit the brakes!