Latest Posts by spider-simp - Page 7

frankie and i got really high and went to spray paint the skate park at last night and frankie, a bug nerd, tried to write “bugs rule” at the bottom of the skate bowl, but they got distracted and wrote, super huge, “BUGS RUG” and we were trying so hard to not die of laughter so the cops didnt come but we were WHEEZING on our backs at the bottom of the bowl in complete darkness. we went back in the morning and took a pic. u can also see the trans anarchy symbol i did.

how

𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝖒𝖔𝖔𝖓

The allure of the Moon has a place in our hearts, and whilst it remains a mystery to us, something we know and something we feel is the strong magick and connection that surrounds it. The Moon affects the oceans of the earth and the cycles of nature. Animals of all kinds are more active during the full moon, weather is more intense during new moons, human pregnancy incubation is calculated by lunar cycles…

The moon has many appearances in folklore, and it plays a very profound role in witchcraft and spell casting, for the subconscious mind is ruled by the Moon. And by becoming acquainted with all the phases of the Moon and it’s many faces, and how to apply them into your magickal practice, its energy will guide you to a deeper connection with nature and magick all around you. Your life could be transformed by working with the different energies of the Moon.

When casting spells you are working with the subconscious mind, the elements, and a higher energy. The Moon is accessed and its transformational powers utilised. So it is always a good idea (with any form of spell casting, working with the moon or not) to make sure you are in a calm and focused state of mind before you begin, and you can do this in many ways, like using meditation. If you are patient, waiting for the correct phase of the Moon, you will enhance the results of your spell casting, and any magickal activity.

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𝔗𝔥𝔢 𝔐𝔬𝔬𝔫 𝔓𝔥𝔞𝔰𝔢𝔰

🍁Waxing crescent: motivation, attraction, success.

🍁First quarter: creativity, divination, calming.

🍁Waxing gibbous: refine, observe, good health.

🍁Full moon: charging, cleansing, power, clarity, healing, reflection.

🍁Waning gibbous: undoing bindings, undoing curses, introspect.

🍁Third quarter: banishing, breaking negative habits, breaking curses.

🍁Waning crescent: balance, success, wisdom.

🍁New moon: new beginnings, cleansing, clarity, reflection, fresh start.

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...IRL I'm a woman and I get pissy when someone ignores the rest of Sonic Lost World and calls it shit just for the controls.

I remember the resistance to “casuals” in video games. I remember the hysteria over “fake geek girls” entering fandoms. I remember Gamergate and Comicsgate. Some of the most toxic backlashes in recent years have stemmed from nerd and geek culture. As a nerd/geek, that severely disappoints me…

We can do better.

lifehacks from the greatest

ways i have tricked people into thinking i am competent:

bought a really nice looking fountain pen

that sounds like a joke but fountain pens are cheap as shit and when you use one people look at you like you’re a fucking wizard

this hero 901 cost me $3 on ebay and i don’t know why people assume that this is a pen for intelligent people but they do

it works better when i am using a nice notebook and not the avengers notebook that makes it look like the hulk is grabbing my sweet pen

i write in code which for some reason leads everyone to assume that i am some kind of da vinci motherfucker, instead of the reality, which is that i am writing about dicks and don’t want anyone to know

it looks like i am constantly taking notes on everything which is both intimidating and inaccurate, just the way i like it

i bought a usb clicker/laser pointer for $11 and now it seems like i’ve got this shit on lock, like i am so pro at giving presentations i even own accessories

holding a clicker makes you seem at least 10% more like you know what you’re talking about i’m pretty sure

i check the weekly freebies on creativemarket every monday so now i have a huge folder of pro-looking website themes and powerpoint templates and fill-in-the-blank resumes (also a lot of autumnal clipart and watercolor flowers and script fonts but that is less relevant)

i bought a ceramic coffee mug at world market years ago and it makes me look like a productive coffee-drinker because no one knows it’s full of hot cocoa

i don’t know why drinking coffee makes you look busy it just does even though i’m pretty sure it statistically reduces productivity

bonus: not only does no one know i’m just drinking Depression Chocolate but they think i am being Environmentally Conscious rather than Poor As Shit

extra bonus: i can take a sip whenever it looks like someone is going to ask a question and then they ask someone else

i almost never have to answer questions and i leave the room a lot because i have to pee constantly so double extra bonus

“That’s a very good question, and one that deserves an in-depth answer, so if you’d like to leave me your card I’d be happy to discuss it with you later one-on-one” aka “how DARE you suggest i waste everyone’s time answering this question right now” aka “lmfao i have no fucking clue what you just said please let me secretly google that okay”

bonus: now it seems like you are a sophisticated grownup who assumes everyone has A Card and if they have to settle for writing their email on a scrap of paper you can feel smug about it even though in your heart you know that you are no better

i’ve got anxiety and poor impulse control and anxiety about my poor impulse control so i generally say jack shit about shit and this constant silence is often misinterpreted as aloof observation

no one knows that my air of mystery is actually a bad case of the shy and i am too shy to correct them so it works out

when i’m on my laptop and i don’t want anyone to notice how much i’m dicking around i turn the brightness way down so they can’t snoop without being obvious

at least one window of notepad++ with some random html page or css stylesheet in it makes randos assume you are some kind of genius doing some genius shit, unless they are CS major randos, in which case i guess find an intimidating looking excel spreadsheet and hope for the best

this accidentally lined up just right

The gif speaks for itself.

But for those of you who don't know, it's my boi Giratina - the "unwanted" son of God himself. My name is Gabriel, which starts with a G.

yeehaw

If you had a Pokémon who’s name started with the same letter as your name, what Pokémon would you have?

I would have an Eevee 😍

bro, take a chill pill-

Also I openly admit that I am an alien from an alternate dimension. I have no intention of destroying the world. Just finding happiness, maybe in a large estate with a beautiful wife and many small animals to love and adore.

i ca;nt bleiev clowns r real.;;; wha tthe fuck….

this guy is my spirit animal-

well lads, this is it.

he's the one I'm bringing back after the raid.

Idk why I just really like these faces zim makes in issue #27. It's not a face that we see him make often (to my knowledge) so him being so visibly uncomfortable is both funny and sad to me lol

This is still one of the greatest things ever made.

Apparently the orange is younger and the yellow chose to identify as the Roman numerals for 2.

Chorus Time Crackups

Hi. Welcome to the first addition of Chorus Time Crackups. So, what happened in my chorus class today, in order, is...

1. The announcements took a while to happen so at every announcement bell everyone joked around and repeated everything said in the announcements as if it were the pledge of allegiance.

2. One of my buddies (he's a baritone) hit a whistle note so now he's our male Mariah Carey. He is apparently horrified by himself due to hitting that note.

3. After that everyone was squeaking as they tried to imitate him.

4. The same buddy and another started doing a joke where one of them was a robot but all his sound effects sounded like a slide whistle.

5. I said "Bemis" ONE TIME throughout the entire class and everyone was roaring with laughter not even five seconds later.

Actually, he walked in on Beta being modified using the pieces of their other "siblings" that were scrapped for being hindrances to Eggman.

declaring “this is the bad place” every time you are even slightly inconvenienced is peak humor

{Yokune Ruko is confirmed to be 90% male.}

{Probably gonna call Ruko a "he" from now on. Please don't correct me.}

{Happy Cinco de Mayo and have a good night.}

Soap? As in handsoap or detergent?

oh i am so genius

Who runs this blog? Joker?

Masquerade mask for glasses wearers

Cheap but effective if you don’t own contacts. I made small hooks that should fall on your glasses if you measure it right. Since it lands on your glasses it shouldn’t scratch you. This only works with really light masks though

“So which ship dynamic is your fav?”

“Yes”

Every time a war breaks out, one person is charged with the sacred duty to hunt down the God of War in his current incarnation and slay him.

In this war, it’s your turn, but there’s one slight problem; you are the one who started the war in the first place.

B3

i never know what to do with the body when i do these so here’s one of those things with arms™

alpha and omega

[speedpaint here]

"Cette baise stupide."

Enough said, use Google translate.

no language should be mocked other than french

#StillABetterLoveStoryThanTwilight

hehehehehe

tell me 5 things you'd put in a pentagram to summon me and I'll tell you if it would work or not

Pls

so like

I know I’m probs a million years late but

press F to pay respects

RIP Snake’s booty

this... this is true savagery right here.

Waluigi: I’m getting too old for this. Go, my son.

Piranha Plant: Can I bring Cousin Petey?

Waluigi: Good idea. Make them all suffer.

Piranha Plant: *hyped sentient plant noises*

I know everyone wants to make jokes about Waluigi being mad about the piranha plant but there is a huge chance that Walugi RAISED that plant.

Every time Waluigi gets a stage or race track there are piranha plants everywhere. If he isnt paired with Wario he is paired with a plant, and he is the ONLY person who puts the plants in those pots with the little wedge.

Look at that, its the same pot, it could even be the same plant, just all grown up. The plant even has a waluigi SKIN

The lips match his nose, the purple matches his hat, and the pot matches his L, its even gold, like Waluigi’s greed.

In conclusion, Waluigi is so proud of his child for killing it in smash

Ain’t lettin’ no Stalchild kill me tonight, uh-uh. *sassy finger wave*

okay bro so I’m at school and there’s this kid who rambles and suddenly he goes “I like to end my Thursday night with a couple of drinks” and I was like ‘wait, what, dude you’re only 15-’ until he said “But the problem is, I’m all out of Capri Suns...”

LMAO I stg I don’t deserve this school

Life is a journey, don’t be afraid to see where it takes you.

Hahaha I must have some serious good luck to have gotten this glorious gif of Sesshomaru

Search a GIF with your first initial, then count how many letters are in your first name. That GIF is what will kill you.

(For example, a Lily would search L and choose the fourth gif)