Mhm, Those Were The Stuffies, I Named HoneyBun, Pastella, And Jewel Off The Top Of My Head, They Each

Me anytime I get into my husband's wallet to grab my EBT card or bus pass

is anyone else constantly afraid they’ll be “caught” doing stuff they’re obviously allowed or even supposed to do

🌹 a flower for everyone not feeling their best today

I drew YUNGBLUD in his album "Sex Not Violence" with a cigarette and smoke that made him.

Lies Hidden on the Inside

You see that I smile 

You see that I cry

You see that I'm calm on the outside

But you don't know me.

You would know me if…

You knew how loud I scream inside

You knew how I hide that anger, scared to black out

You knew how my mum manipulated me, made me scared to let out that volcanic eruption of rage.

You see that I wear the clothes that I love

You see that I cry when I hurt my friends and family 

You see that I keep “bad” feelings inside

But you don't know me.

You would know me if you took a second to look in my eyes, at the emotion hidden inside, to feel the anger and rage boiling up inside like a kettle, water almost reaching the top. 

You would know me if…

you let me trust you enough to let you in

You would know me

But you don't. 

You don't know how I worry about my body, I hate the way I look, because my dad called me a slut.

You don't know how I forced myself to throw up because as a kid I was obese.

You don't know how I wasn't even allowed to hate because “hate is a strong word” so instead I said I “strongly disliked” someone or something instead. I felt too anxious to even feel my emotions fully because what if my family got upset about it because GOD FORBID I feel any emotion aside from happiness. 

You don't know how I've had to learn to gauge people's emotions so I didn't get hurt.

You don't know how I was raped 4 times and none of them got caught because obviously they're “mentally younger” than me so I'd get in trouble, not them. 

You don't know how everyday for years I cut just to feel something other than pain. 

You don't know me and I hope you never do.

I hope you never figure out my “lies hidden on the inside.” 

I felt pretty in these pictures ❤️

Also doges

This is Tater Tot my little sister's dog

This is Sassy

This is Barney

This doge is named Tillie.

Reminder this is an 18plus blog

I have multiple personalities and I can draw them as pictures pop up in my head thinking about each one, this is Winterneko, she's more of a cat, kind of where my pet space stems, another one is Shadowneko who basically acts like her sister and is a polar opposite of Winter. Winter loves the sun and lounging in it where Shadow absolutely loves the snow. Then there's Atlas who is our protector, they only come out when I'm too drained or angry so we don't lose our shit, she's protected our husband as well a few hundred times, he can fight but we prefer him to not. Then there's me, Apollo, I'm more of the main alter but we also have dead name who locks themselves in a box so they don't go psycho on others. I'm more of an empath, Atlas is an energy vampire blocker, she doesn't get affected by other negative empaths, Winter gives off calm, positive, and safe energy, Shadow gives off more of a fuck off vibe.

Aftercare

I’ve organized some of the things I need from aftercare (in person or long distance) into 4 components, and thought it could be helpful for others too! I’ve put some examples for each, but it will of course look different for everyone.

1. Physical Care/Needs -

Wiping away tears

Helping up from floor

Getting a warm towel

Soothing bruises

Getting a glass of water

2. Physical Comfort/Affection -

Gentle kisses and hugs

Holding eachother tight

Breathing with eachother

Cuddling and/or napping together

Brushing fingers through hair

3. Scene Validation -

“That was so fun/sexy”

“That felt so good when you ____”

“You were such a good ____ for me”

“I love the bruises/marks you gave me”

“Thank you for (carrying out some fantasy) with me”

4. Human Affirmations -

“I love you; I care about you”

“I’m so grateful to have you in my life”

“I always have a great time when I’m with you”

“You’re a wonderful/kind/etc person”

Mentioning a non-sexual part of your relationship that you like, or reiterating that you value eachother as more than just a sub/dom(me)

I think that this can work whether you have a deeper connection or a more casual play partner! I always feel best when all of these components are covered during aftercare.

These things can obv be done in person, and I think it’s also really important to give this kind of care when you’re long distance, even if it’s just through words after sexting… for example-

“When we were done, I would help you up and wipe away your tears, bring you a warm towel and make sure you’re ok. Then I’d love to cuddle, with your head on my chest, and give you forehead kisses while telling you how good you made me feel and how wonderful of a person I think you are.”

Thanks for reading! Be safe everyone 💕💕

I drawed.

Cute date idea, I’ll tie you up and cut your clothes off while you try and pretend I can’t see how wet you are.