Rachel: We Don't Need To Know About Your Asphyxiation Kink.

Salim: Have you guys seen Jason?

Rachel: No, haven’t seen him since the storm started

Nick: Since the sto- JASON NO!

Meanwhile, Jason standing in the middle of a thunderstorm with a shovel raised high: STRIKE ME DOWN ZEUS, YOU DON’T HAVE THE BALLS

Jason: We can’t have Salim come to his party yet. The sign’s not finished- it’s supposed to say ‘Salim’s Birthday’

Nick: What does it say now?

Jason: ‘Salim’s Bi’.

Jason:

Jason: Nevermind, that’s perfect. We’re ready!

Jason, depressed, lying on the floor: I just feel like a noodle

Salim joining him on the floor and hugging him: Good, I like pasta

Rachel: WhY does this hallway smell like dater-pe???

Nick: Merwin uses a really strong cologne.

Jason: Overactive sweat glands, you know how it is.

Merwin: I smell fine!!

Rachel: Shower. Now.

Salim: no i’m not tired of being nice, yes i still just wanna go apeshit, these things can coexist, stop asking me

Supermassive games: there is only one thing worse than being dead.

*tears off another piece of paper to reveal “eric being dead”*

Supermassive games: boom.

The fandom: Eric

Supermassive games: no-

Salim, whose first language isn’t English: Hello! I’m sorry if my English isn’t very good.

Jason, whose first language is English: Hte fuckign.

Jason, watching Zain steal something: Man, what an idiot, where are his parents?

Jason:

Jason: Oh shit, I am the parent

Jason after kissing Salim: this is sick as af as fuck if im being tbh

Salim: [takes a deep breath] Today is gonna be a good day

Salim: [deep breath] There’s going to be no bullshit

Salim: [opens the door to see Jason standing there]

Jason: My shoes are on the roof again

Salim: [closes the door]