Nick: *throws Shade*

The legend of the minecraft glow squid

*comes up to u & hands u a bottle of water but it looks like this*

Nick: Why are you so mad at me? Is it because I slept with Eric?

Rachel: YOU WHAT?!

Nick: Fuck, it wasn't that.

Salim: [takes a deep breath] Today is gonna be a good day

Salim: [deep breath] There’s going to be no bullshit

Salim: [opens the door to see Jason standing there]

Jason: My shoes are on the roof again

Salim: [closes the door]

Salim: Are you sure I can't hold the umbrella for you..?

Jason: I'm doing something nice for you because I love you!!!

Salim: Alright, thank you :')

salim's neck has become non-existent after this point RIP this man and his height over his boyfriend 😔

Jason: Salim is the kind of person that makes everyone think about them all the time, even when you’re asleep, right?

Rachel: I don’t think of Salim all the time

Eric: I don’t dream about Lieutenant Othman

Nick: When you say everyone, do you mean yourself?

Salim: Crushes are the worst.

Jason: Right. Whenever I'm near someone I have a crush on, I start acting stupid.

Salim: You're always acting stupid.

Jason: Yeah... don't think about that too hard.

Zain: i made you a friendship bracelet.

Jason: you know, i'm not really a jewellery person.

Zain: well you don't have to wear it if you don't want t-

Jason: no, i'm gonna wear it forever, back off!

Nick: so… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with Salim recently.

Jason: no, Nicky, its not what it looks like, I swear.

Nick: oh really? so no reason for me to be jealous?

Jason: no! you’re the only one for me.

Nick: is that so?

Jason: i promise! Salim and I are just dating, okay? He’s my boyfriend.

Nick: so there are no best-friends-feelings involved?

Jason: you are still my one and only best friend! He’s just the love of my life, nothing more!

Nick: but I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?

Jason: of course bro!

Nick: bro...

Salim: what the-

Rachel: We don't need to know about your asphyxiation kink.

Merwin: My tinctures?

Rachel: No, I said we don't need to know about your asphyxiation kink.

Merwin: Oh, I thought you said tinctures.

Rachel: Why the FUCK would I say tinctures???

friend referred to Jason as Male Wife Two-One Actual the other day and I still haven't recovered