Interviewer: What Kind Of Guy Do You Prefer?

Jason: We can’t have Salim come to his party yet. The sign’s not finished- it’s supposed to say ‘Salim’s Birthday’

Nick: What does it say now?

Jason: ‘Salim’s Bi’.

Jason:

Jason: Nevermind, that’s perfect. We’re ready!

When reading fanfic keep in mind that for professional literature: 

Short story: under 7,500

Novelette: between 7,500 and 17,500

Novella: between 17,500 and 40,000

Novel: over 40,000

Fics over 40k are literally a novel written and shared for free.  If you have written a 40k+ fic, you have literally written a novel.

do y'all ever reread your own fics from like years ago and realise you've regressed in writing ability because that's how i feel about this fic lmao

Hey y’all, fun fact if you didn’t know, I wrote a fic like ages ago where Salim moves to London, so… if you wanna check that out it’s linked below<3

https://archiveofourown.org/works/35081476/chapters/87385063

Zain, reading a book Jason gave him: Baba, what's a brothel?

Salim, after a long pause: It's a place where they make soup.

Dude, it’s like Rick went through everyone’s solangelo headcannons and went “uhhhh... yeah, I can do that”

Jason: ow! son of a bi-

Salim pointing to Zain: Jason! children!

Jason: … iscuit. son of a biscuit.

Nick: nice save.

Jason: yeah. fucking nailed it.

Jason: Yeah, don’t worry Salim, we had a great time at the pumpkin patch! isn’t that right Zain?

*a pumpkin strapped in the backseat*

Jason: I’m gonna have to call you back

Jason: No, don't-!

Nick: JASON LISTENS TO WHITE GIRL MUSIC!!

Rachel: What?

Joey: Lmao why??

Jason: BRITNEY SPEARS DIED FOR OUR SINS, OKAY??

Nick: Are you gonna go talk to Eric?

Rachel: If he really wants to talk to me, he can come to my room. On his hands and knees.

Zain: Is 37 a prime number, Jason?

Jason, trying to help with his homework: Fuckin... I'm a marine!!!!