Zain, Reading A Book Jason Gave Him: Baba, What's A Brothel?

Salim: Okay, truth or dare?

Jason: Truth

Salim: How many hours have you slept this week?

Jason: ...Dare

Salim: Go to bed

Jason: I’ve decided that I don’t like this game

Salim: Crushes are the worst.

Jason: Right. Whenever I'm near someone I have a crush on, I start acting stupid.

Salim: You're always acting stupid.

Jason: Yeah... don't think about that too hard.

Jason: How do you know how to kiss? like who teaches you?

Salim: Well it’s actually a class, but sadly it’s full at the moment now.

Salim: Would you like private lessons?

Nick: Damn that was smooth.

Salim: Guys, I’ve been meaning to tell you… Jason and I are dating.

Jason, Nick, Rachel, and Eric: *gasp*

Salim: Jason, why are you surprised?!

Jason: Hey, Rachel, have you seen Goncharov?

Rachel: No, what's Goncharov?

Nick: Oh, only my favorite Scorcese movie!

Joey: It's so good, ma'am.

Rachel: Alright, I'll put Goncharov on my list.

Jason: You do that, Rachel.

Rachel: How do you spell it?

Alternatively

Jason: ow! son of a bi-

Salim pointing to Zain: Jason! children!

Jason: … isexual. son of a bisexual.

Jason: No, don't-!

Nick: JASON LISTENS TO WHITE GIRL MUSIC!!

Rachel: What?

Joey: Lmao why??

Jason: BRITNEY SPEARS DIED FOR OUR SINS, OKAY??

Nick: Hey we should do this insane dangerous thing that would get us all killed!

Jason: My beautiful baby angel child who can do no wrong, you are usually right but in this case I'm going to have to ask you to sit this one out.

Nick: Aw, okay :(

Eric: Or, we could-

Jason: *shoots him dead*

Jason when he disagrees with Nick: I’m sorry buddy, but no.

Jason when he disagrees with Eric:

aaaaaaaaaaa

Hi I’m not out to like 90% of the people I know and I keep having to not only get deadnamed but deadname myself ahaha so can someone please just real quick call me Toby and by they/them pronouns? aaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Salim: Jason, what is your favourite book?

Jason: Favorite book? ...Do Kim Kardashian's tweets count?

Salim: ...No.