Alternatively

Eric: This is my wife, Rachel, and her boyfriend, Nick. Who is also my boyfriend.

...33

Nick: You gotta live more in the moment! Today is a gift!

Jason: Is there a receipt?

TRUEEEE and he yells at me a lot >:(

Solas is so tragic. How did BioWare go ‘we are making an elven trickster god companion’ and then end up with ‘elf benedict cumberbatch negs you asmr’

Jason: OK I’M GIVING YOU TEN SECONDS TO TELL ME WHO ATE MY OREOS BEFORE I START WREAKING HAVOC ON YOUR ASSES

Eric: i saw Salim go into the cabi…

Salim: Eric please don’t do this

Eric: cabinet and grab the pack

Salim: why would you do this to me

Jason: oh Salim it was you? do you want another pack babe?

Rachel: Ah yes, the four love languages.

Rachel, pointing at Eric: “My family never told me they were proud of me”

Rachel, pointing at Salim: “I'm so fucking tired please god just let me rest for five minutes”

Rachel, pointing at Nick: “Please pay attention to me”

Rachel, pointing at Jason: “Touch Starved”

Jason: You have that glint in your eye that either says 'I'm Mary Poppins' or 'I'm going to dump your body in that chasm river.'

Salim: We'll never know which it is!

Jason: You know they kicked Robin Williams out of Juilliard?

Nick: Really? Oh, man, what'd he play?

Jason: ARE YOU-

Rachel: Fucking.

Jason: KIDDING ME? YOU-

Rachel: Fucking.

Jason: IDIOT!

Nick: What was that?

Rachel: Salim bet Jason couldn't stop swearing for a week, so I’m helping him out.

Rachel: I keep telling my boyfriend that he can't love Chappell Roan and be straight, but he does, and he is :/

Eric: I don't know about that,

Rachel: Is Nick gay???

Eric: He was last night...