Plasticflamingowithastrap - Lover Of Boy Toys

i need you guys to look at this fuckign post

treat black queers kindly and love us. that's all.

one time when i was 17 i watched an episode of doctor who (tennant years) that made me so inconsolable that i went upstairs to my mom and i sobbed like, "please don't make fun of me, i'm so upset about a fake person from a tv show right now i can't stop crying." she let me sit in her lap and tell her all about the episode and i stopped crying and said i felt so stupid and she started laughing and she said, "i once cried this hard in college over a star trek episode. want to hear about it?" i said yes and then while she told me about the episode she got upset all over again 30 years later and she started crying and then i started laughing about it so hard i started crying again

your mom is a baked potato your dad's dumb ass is asparagus and you are a god damn green bean

YEAH YOU SHOULD TOTALLY WEAR THE CROP TOP!!! [SAID WITH INTENT OF KISSING YOUR BELLY]

youtube should give viewers the option to grade video essays like it's a high school english class assignment and if the median grade is below passing then they stick a huge png over your video advising that this is a vlog with slide show components. if the youtuber ever goes "umm. I'm not going to attempt to pronounce this" at any point then they're genetically altered to be able to survive underground and let loose in an endless series of catacombs built beneath their home to live the rest of their life as the fabled town troll.

She'll fuck me if I cook good enough I know it