One Of My Fondest Memories As A Child Was When Our Power Would Go Out And My Family Would Play "little

For us here in Chicago spring has finally arrived. I know it's almost May but here it seems like we have been cut back to only two seasons, winter and summer with maybe two weeks of fall and spring (if we're lucky). So with hopefully just three or four more days of 30 degree weather left, it's time to break out the camping gear!

Me (Jake) and my girlfriend Allison live in a one bedroom apartment in the city with our cat Turd Ferguson (Turdie for short). Even though there's a park across the street it doesn't fulfill the desire we get to be outside. This is a blog for us to share our outdoor experiences and love of nature. Enjoy! 

In the next few days Allison and I will be taking a trip to a small lake. Three (and now four since my one year old niece is going) generations of my family have gone to this lake as a regular trip throughout the year. It will be Allison's fist time going and I'm very excited for her to finally see it.

There's something about revisiting a place from your childhood that makes it wondrous and spectacular. For me it's like reading a book that you read when you were young and your imagination comes rushing back at you. The adventure you felt turning the page and finding a dragon staring right back at you, or coming to a cliff and reading about all the hundreds of ships anchored below. This lake is a magical place to me, it brings back something from my childhood that I thought had been lost while growing up.

It is my Shire and my Narnia. It is my Neverland. While the biggest problems of my everyday life will float away on the waves, I know that I won't want to come back and I know that I'll never truly want to grow up.

Sleepless

I can't go to sleep.

About an hour ago I was hit with this huge wave of depression that seemed to come out of no where. It was this weight on my chest consisting of every fear, anger, and frustration I have about my life. It's not that I'm an unhappy person but for some reason I became terrified about the direction my life is headed in. I'm working a job that I can mildly stand, in a relationship I'm afraid to lose, and living a life that I've convinced myself will implode at any given moment.

The reason I can't go to sleep is because lying in bed will only serve to amplify the voices since there is nothing distracting me from thinking about them. They'll just get louder and louder until I finally pass out. These moods of mine aren't as frequent as they are for many people but they are starting to worry me.

5 things to know about me

Meat should always be rare.

Being barefoot is best.

Usually tea but coffee after thanksgiving dinner.

Creativity is my lifeblood.

I love the water.

Dreaming of Parks and Rec

It’s Anne Perkins wedding and we’re at a grocery store to pick out something for her fiancés bachelor party when we find out that he cheated on her. This is the same moment when I realize that I’m still in love with her. Leslie is super excited for the wedding because she doesn’t know anything and starts dragging me towards the bathroom but I tell her she has to let me go since I can’t go in the girls bathroom. I go over and all the guys are showing Anne that we picked out fish for the party and I’m super depressed so it just comes out as “yeah, fish”. I leave them and go to the men’s room where every stall is taken by guys standing up on the top of the walls and peeing down into the toilet. Ron gets down from doing that and I start to take his stall but he tells me he has to poop too. I start to pee at a urinal and a guy on top on a stall says “geez can’t anyone stand anymore?” And I reply with “geez can’t anyone sit anymore?”. So I’m having trouble peeing and then all of the sudden several of the guys at the urinals and I get peed on. We all start freaking out and I go over to the sink and start splashing myself with water and saying fuck as I try to dry off with a towel. Then all the emotions start coming out and I shout fuck and throw the towel right as this dad and baby walk past. The dad gives me a dirty look and I start apologizing. I pick up the towel and lean against the hand dryers. Just then Mark Brandanawitz steps out from behind a ring of sinks with Anne. She’s also soaked and holding back tears. I know she knows about her fiancé and I start to have trouble holding back the tears because I love her so much but she thinks it’s because I feel bad about her fiancé. Then she walks forward and we hug really tightly and both burst out crying.

That was a dream I had few months ago that was so vivid and emotional I woke up just short of being in tears. I wrote down everything I could remember and even now I can remember just how I felt waking up that night.

He was a thing of brush and liquid eye, of fur and muzzle and hoof, he was a thing of horn and blood that would smell like autumn if you bled it out on the ground.

- Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451

Chicago Has gotten almost 60 inches of snow this winter, close to three times our average 22 inches. Gotten the car stuck at least 5 times already and I'm sure we've got at least another 45 days of this.

Really considering a move to a better climate (or at least one with better road plows).

Looking forward to longer days, but enjoying these beautiful nights. Happy solstice!

Live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air...

-Ralph Waldo Emerson