Latest Posts by lgclili - Page 6
i know you don’t speak my language but i love the way she’s talking to me — @lgcamelia, april '21.
it’s one of those days.
the days where lili couldn’t be fucked to do anything the coaches asked of her — they’d told her time and time again that she should be pushing herself, that securing her spot in whatever choreography they were currently going through wasn’t enough — that she should be front and center, present and determined to do what it takes to prove that she wasn’t going to do the same things she had done at her last company.
as if whatever she had done at said company had warranted such treatment.
( sure she flaked on debut but did that mean she was a flake — lili liked to think not )
so, it comes again — probably the fourth time today — that a coach comes and goes, exasperated at lili’s reeling and appalling plethora of excuses. once more using the — ‘sorry, can’t understand’ — to her advantage.
that is until a trainee — who obviously could understand her — is suddenly brought to the helm and into the throes of lili’s obnoxious display of unintentional rebellion. fuck, there goes her fun.
when the girl comes to her, lili only raises a brow in amused surprise, “huh — that was quick. didn’t think they would send in plan b so soon.” she says in mandarin, flicking the plastic spoon that held the last bites of her yogurt back into its cup.
truth or dare, will we be alright? — @lgcjisoo, january '24.
she sits beside him in a huff, arms and legs crossed as her gaze remains directed away from his own. a part of her wonders why her feet had even brought her so far just to do this — why was she wasting her time?
he was obviously done with her, he didn’t even wish her happy birthday ( despite saying she didn’t care all these years of birthdays spent together in lieu of actual familial love, at least she had him but now — did she even have that )
but another part of her is already at a loss — ready to wave the white flag because a part of her was lonely without him — fuck,
her leg shakes up and down impatiently before finally whipping her head around to look at him, “so what — just because we’re not talking you’re not going to say happy birthday to me?” she sniffs, knowing she was the one in the wrong in the first place — but maybe this could show she was trying to show remorse.
two girls freezing their asses off but don’t you know a gossiping hoe never gets cold? — @lgcmaylin
ever since snow had fallen upon seoul, the chill in the city had only turned for the worse — cloaking the entirety of the peninsula in the near negatives.
and you might be asking: just why was lili subjecting herself to the very cold that was freezing her to bits?
well — there were two presentable answers for such a thing.
one.
lili needed a smoke — badly — and the designated places for such a thing lacked the common decency of having a working heater.
and two.
she needed some space to air out her grievances after the last practice with a certain coach. and oddly enough, lili thought it was tacky to talk shit about an anal coach inside the company — but outside, mere feet away from where the door had safely hit its hinges, and even further away from nosy ears, did she feel comfortable to do just that.
unfortunately, the smoke that flows from pursed lips cease within minutes of another’s arrival. the cigarette snubbed at the sudden welcome, crushed beneath a leather boot, before being replaced with a pack of gum. it wasn’t a worthy substitute but because it was maylin, lili made an exception — just because the other girl quit all those years ago didn’t mean lili would ignore the other’s hard work just to get her nerves calmed.
immediately she flies into the other’s side, arm in arm, as if to conserve whatever heat the other had brought with her. “it’s so fucking cold tonight —” she breathes, the warmth of her breath billowing out into the cold in a puff.
meet ! xu lili ( 徐莉莉 ), '01 — i’m the prettiest poison you’ve ever seen.
re: prof / points / tags / pinterest
𝟭 . DISC — upon request! / TWIT — @/ninithots / OOC.
BIRTH NAME — li yifei (李亦菲) LEGAL NAME — xu yifei (徐亦菲) ENGLISH NAME — xu lili (徐莉莉) KOREAN NAME — seo yeokbi (서역비), seo lili (서리리) BIRTHDAY — january 01, 2001 BIRTHPLACE — beijing, china BLOOD TYPE — AB ZODIAC SIGN — capricorn FAVORITE MOTTO —
it is not enough to be good, if better is possible.
RANDOM FACTS —
took ballet for twelve years
born in beijing, she moved to los angeles when she was 7
was adopted by her grandmother when she moved to the usa, there she gained dual citizenship
can speak 3 languages: mandarin, english and korean
her favorite color is baby pink
was about to debut in a low-level company but was dropped from the lineup for 'unknown' reasons
is very much into fashion, enjoys thrifting and calls vogue and harper's bazaar her bible
loves sour candies, her favorite is sour tamarind-flavored candies
claims that her last meal would be an iced americano, sour tamarind candies and malatang
loves spicy food, and the more it numbs her tongue, the better
loves wong kar-wai movies, especially in the mood for love and chungking express
is very into nail art and always, always, always has her nails done
her favorite singers are christina aguilera, britney spears, mariah carey, sza and ariana grande
YEAR END GOALS —
debut
work on her whistle register
challenge herself with more difficult choreographies
PREVIOUS APPEARANCES & PROJECTS —
n/a
MOST MEMORABLE EVENT —
n/a
@LGCENT just posted a photo!
some people are worth melting for 🤍❄️
#lgctrainees #lgcent #xulili
the first day of the year.
lili knows what it is — she always know what it is — but as all the years before, she learns it’s better to not expect anything. less expectations, less chances for her to get her hopes up and have them fall apart once the clock strikes midnight and the second day of the year comes with the first going unnoticed — again.
the first day of the year.
lili knows what it is — she does — because the first day of the year: is her birthday.
this year comes in the form of a phone call and an apology — her grandmother calls, gives her her best, and then apologizes for hosting a party — not in her honor — but for the nth charity excursion her grandmother was aiding. her grandmother was 591 miles, and 2 hours and 15 minutes away and all lili received was a phone call — one that lasted less than ten minutes.
it would be sad if it wasn’t so … expected.
her birthdays of past, much like she believes this year to be, were always inconsequential. days that went by with no thoughts except living until the next day. this year wouldn’t be any different. this year, she thinks, she will still bear the bitter agony of expecting something she shouldn’t.
the first day of the year.
lili knows what it is — but this year, is surprisingly different.
what lili hadn’t been expecting was seeing taeha — having taeha lead with a surprise even though lili has always said ( rather unconvincingly, might we add ) that she didn't like surprises — suddenly being immersed in the brilliance that was taeha and being the center of her energetic display of affection. frozen in her place, her eyes open to reveal the same room she had entered minutes earlier, the one significant change is taeha — carrying a cake that lili can only describe as atrocious on sight, but she bites her lip.
( whether to stop the tears that had suddenly begun to well up at her lashes or the onslaught of forced ‘complaints’ at the tongue — who knows )
instead, she fiddles with a small smile pressed between her lips — a hand running through her hair as the other nears, “did you make this yourself?” even if the obvious is very well obvious, she still asks, inspecting the cake as she does so. it was cute, now that she looked at it, if she ignored the imperfections here and there — she could see taeha’s sincerity in clear view.
it’s the first day of the year.
lili knows what it is — had readied herself with zero expectations — but a part of her finds the longing in it quenched at the sight of taeha’s brilliant smile and her horribly iced penmanship. it made the saying it’s the thought that counts loom in the back of her mind and she can’t help the way her heart swoons, leaning forward at taeha’s command — eyes closing, one by one, as she takes a second — maybe three — before she blows out the candles.
「 ❀ 」 ━━ ˗ˏˋ 22 CANDLES !
@lgclili
"Close your eyes and keep them closed!" Taeha instructs from her place just outside the practice room. Inside Lili would be waiting for an extra special, super duper surprise ( as the string of texts she'd sent a few hours prior promised ). A bit of scuffle and shuffle can be heard beyond the open door, before she moves to take a few careful steps into the room, balancing a tray on her forearms.
"Okay, now open your eyes!"
On the tray is mini two - well, more like 1.5 if one were to be technical - tiered vanilla cake with a strawberry filling, covered by a thick layer of pink buttercream frosting. The words Happy Birthday are written in purple icing on top, alongside a pink and purple smudge camouflaged by a cluster of red candies arranged in the shape of a heart to conceal Taeha's failed attempts at writing Lili's name in fancy script. Finally, twenty-two brightly lit candles are placed wherever space would allow, illuminating Taeha's excited grin.
Sure, some may call it a "homemade monstrosity" ( coined by her older brother who was quite amused watching the cake's creation on Taeha's FaceTime version of Kitchen Nightmares ), but the trainee is certain her friend will love it! ...At least she hopes she does.
"Happy birthday, Lili! Make a wish!"
dark eyes flicker from his face to the very obvious disarray he called his hair. but she says no more — opting to twirl her pencil around deft fingertips, cheek sitting against her palm as she stares, watching him begin to tidy himself up. an endeavor he doesn’t quite see through when he slumps into his chair and she can only bite back a laugh.
“offended — oh, so you’re hoping to be unalived before the new year? i see, i see.”
she nods, as if making a mental note — even if such a thing will probably be forgotten by the end of the day, knowing her. letting the spiral leave her grasp, she makes a pout — only to have the item returned to her in due time. “and what is this supposed to be?” she asks, even though the obvious was plain for her to see, re-opening the book to the page he was last at — eyeing the new addition just short of the random doodles she had done earlier.
lili glances up when one of the coaches appears handing out the game's item to the remainder of stragglers that had passed the threshold of their room. reaching over for the item that had been passed around when she had arrived, she tosses the shuttlecock — the jegi — at him, “제기차기.”
"Huh? How did you know?" He fixes his posture momentarily to check himself in the reflection of the window, reaching up smooth down the unruly strands with only his palms and determination. He quickly gives up, sinking back into his chair with a shocking lack of energy. He pulls his backpack closer to his feet when he spots another trainee cutting through the small space between his desk and the one in front of him. He refocuses his attention on his friend, noticing the smirk on her lips.
"I would be offended if I wasn't top three in your hit list." He snatches the notebook from her grasp, turning it on it's side to read her scribbles. He can't make out anything useful besides some interesting doodles. "Is this how the inside of your mind looks like, Lils?" He teases, reaching for the front pocket of his backpack to grab one of his pens. He adds his own mark on the page, facing away from the trainee to keep her from grabbing it back before his masterpiece was done. It was a simplistic doodle of the girl and a butterfly on her shoulder. "Here you go!" He displays the page of the notebook like it was a work art hung on a gallery wall, placing it in front of her before closing the pages. "I'll stop fooling around... What are we learning?"
໒꒱ . TRAINEE MISSION # 15 、
round and round it goes.
where it stops — no one knows.
she pulls the string once more, ricocheting the top into the floor. the clatter it makes as it hits the ground does not strip her from her reverie, irises hypnotized by the spin and pull of the game. finally a game that she had a knack at — that didn’t require her to think or to do or to ace at the first go. all it took was a pull of the twine and the top would fall apart from her fingertips. ready to split the ground beneath it as it run amok around them.
and run it does, running in circles from point a to point z. never in the same place, its center of gravity teetering fast until it tilts a little too far on one side, collapsing upon itself as it topples. a pause in the game as she snatches it up to start all over again.
again, it’ll spin round and round.
where it stops — her eyes will go.
follow it until the end, like an expectant child would to a mother.
or like what she believes an expectant child would do in the presence of one it fawned over. lili would no know better. like the top, she finds herself spinning and spinning — fast and furious through the lanes of people, around people, through people, continuing on until her own center of gravity tilts — and she stops,
all to begin again.
because like a top, lili finds herself adjusting — forcing herself to acclimate to places unfamiliar, submerging head first into a game she doesn’t know, but must learn in order to survive.
like a top, she’ll spin — spin and spin because she’s at the mercy of someone else.
the top pivots at the will of her pull, like she bends for the validation of others. begging for acceptance, vying for a win amongst the multitude of losses just stacked against her.
fingers pull at the string once more.
and again, she’ll spin — spin, spin.
round and round, it goes.
where she’ll stop? no one knows.
໒꒱ . TRAINEE MISSION # 15 、REFLECT
this is stupid, she thinks.
it’s a waste of time, is another thought that boulders by, when she’s saddled with the sash that cinches her waist and nearly ceases the blood flowing along her thigh. when fingers curl into said sash, she feels her veins pop and her body tense against impact. it wasn’t that lili couldn’t play the game — she could if she really, reallytried to — it’s that she would rather be doing something that wouldn’t ruin her hair that she had spent all morning straightening out and give her blotchy bruises that would take weeks to go away. something like kite flying or throwing those sticks around.
what was it called again? yut … something …
yutnori, was it?
it was harmless — throwing around sticks until one or the other gets mal and is back to the beginning.
yeah, that was easy — that was fun. lili had enjoyed that. would probably go as far as to say it was one of her favorite games in the last few weeks. because that wouldn’t result in bodily injuries being subjected under the guise of friendly competition.
yeah — that. lili would much prefer doing that instead of being thrown about like a rag doll in the eyes of some murderous trainee who lili had probably fucked over sometime this year. ( not a joke, also not funny — and lastly, ow )
thrown onto her back — she cries foul!
that time she really must have dislocated something, her shoulder? her neck — her entire left buttock, perhaps? something to excuse her from the ordeal of basically being pretzeled minus the salt. the round lasts for less than a minute, a flash dance of limbs leaving her breathless and finally she’s removed from the ring, left to nurse her ‘wounds’ by the side with a horrifying grimace upon her lips. the aching at her hip was sure to leave one of those nasty bruises she was hoping she wouldn’t be getting.
but alas, said murderous trainee just had to throw in some type of special taekwondo move into the mix.
once more, the thought crosses as she hisses at the pain now echoing from her pelvic bone:
stupid, stupid, stupid.
his absence doesn’t escape her notice —
it wasn’t that she was used to him being early, rather she was used to him, well, being there. and the fact that he wasn’t, lili could not help the unease it brought her. teeth gnaw at her bottom lip, pencil scribbling away at nonsensical nothings did little to appease her, and now the anxiousness she felt had begun to swell from within. who else was she to launder her unending, and inconsequent, annoyances to but him — and especially now where the topic of the day was of a history that she had absolutely no interest in whatsoever. who had time for games when the game of life was already taking deep pleasure in fucking with her?
when he makes his timely entrance, she takes note of the on the dot punctuation with a purse of the lips and an amused lift of a brow. “as a matter of fact. you just made the top of the list,” teeth primly hidden behind a smirk as she taps the end of her pencil against his hand when noeul shifts her way. “did you oversleep?” her gaze roams from the reddening of his eyes to the curl of bedhead that had obviously been missed in his haste.
chatterbox
It was rare when he showed up late on Saturdays, but today was one of those days where everything went wrong for him. From sleeping past three alarm clocks to not closing his water bottle and spilling the liquids in front of apartment door to not being able to catch the the bus.... That should have been the final straw for him. He should have went back to his bed, but instead, he bursts through the door a minute before the educational session starts. It all fell too familiar to him attending his college courses. Was he in limbo? Was he being tortured?
He settles next to Lili, slumping over the table and directly on top of his backpack, which he could use as a pillow. No. He forces himself to sit upright, lifting his hands to rub aggressively at his eyes with the back of his fingers. "What are we learning today? Did you start taking notes, hm?" He playfully leans closer, pulling at her notebook to peek at the page. "Is this your hit list, Lils?" He audibly whispers in English, lisp evident when he utters his nickname for her.
@lgclili
XU LILI '01 / B. BEIJING, RAISED IN LA .
hellooooooo ~ this is nini again with a second character who's definitely a whole 180 approach from jino lol. took me a while to get an intro up because end of the year things kept me busy ! and i was also still trying to figure out how best to explain little miss lili here ~ but nevertheless, we're here now and down below you can get a good idea of this gal who is both bite and bark and will very much prove it !!! but i promise she can be nice even if it comes off haughty and self-serving so please like if you'd like to plot ♡
TL;DR signed jul. 2020, female senior morning group, female dorm a; self-serving, self-absorbed and overly self-concious? yet deep, deep, deep down she has a heart of gold? just got to dig deep enough underneath all her generational trauma lol
BACKGROUND
born li yifei, her name was legally changed to xu yifei when she got adopted by her grandmother / it was further changed when she gained dual citizenship through her grandmother when she moved her to los angeles -> now she goes by xu lili
her parents were a love that burned hot but burned out fast kind of relationship
also didn't help that her dad and mom were from starkly different social brackets that when her grandmother strongly opposed the marriage, her mother got disowned and left to be with her husband
but when the marriage ultimately fell apart, in a last ditch effort, they had lili
for a while it worked until the pains of motherhood, marriage and poverty got too much and when she turned 5, her parents divorced: her mother got her and her father got his freedom back — apparently that meant never seeing lili again, too
a year after her divorce, her mother met a new man (richer, older) and started a new family alongside that man’s children from a prev. marriage. by the time she was 7, lili was brought back to her grandmother’s and like her father, that would be the last she’d see of her mother
being adopted by her grandmother was a start to a new life, adapting to a new environment and learning that love wasn’t just given: it was earned
her grandmother was the owner of a real estate investment / development group; a woman of high expectations and most of all, showed love like how she did business: she expected results in return for her nurture
in the case of lili: her grandmother enrolled her into all the best programs, nurtured her love for performing, and expected the excellence that proceeded from the investment
but excellence can only go so far with natural talent, lili had the talent but in comparison to her peers, she didn’t have the it needed to take her far, something she learns when she receives no offers to continue her ballet career
( 2017 ) instead, she looks elsewhere to continue her love, to find adoration elsewhere is null when her grandmother is pressuring her for results: she auditions for a company in la and passes; suddenly she’s on a flight to korea and training to debut in a girl group of some unknown company
just when she was about to debut, her grandmother ends up sick and she went home when she was supposed to be practicing/preparing for debut
( 2020 ) she ends up getting dropped from the debut lineup upon return (and still has the audacity to be sad about it) ~
she joins lgc in jul. 2020 after getting dropped from debut and consequently the label
TIDBITS
much prefers to be called lili
was quiet and withdrawn as a kid because of her parental troubles, only was able to really fully express herself through performing
because of that she was able to come out of her shell, however, it was falsified by the desperate need of validation and her inherent ego that waged a war with her insecurities
has imposter syndrome, so she on the low sabotages herself
such as when she was supposed to debut, she knew what was at stake but still left -> her grandmother didn’t even appreciate her visiting when she was sick, instead she was told to go back to korea and finish what she started
headstrong and stubborn, her grandmother had brought her up to say what was on her mind and not care about others -> it only made her selfish and self-serving
a bit of a tsundere, if you squint but i swear it’s there, she’s not used to people being overly affectionate to her and is very rarely affectionate; will be the one to give an awkward shoulder pat when comforting
honestly because of her parents she doesn't believe in love, thinks it's superficial, thinks lust is also dumb but what can a girl do when she has needs 💅 might also think she's hard to love / doesn't deserve it because of her trauma from her parents and her grandmother
is 100% right, always, even when she is 100% wrong — will argue why she’s right
she likes being as she says ~ playful ~ and riling people up and causing friction, call it what you will but i think it’s the attention-seeker in her thinking that even if she can’t get people to like her, if they’re irritated, that means they have to be thinking about her still? right ???
ambitious to a fault, she will do what she needs to do to get where she wants to, even if that means burning some bridges
her grandmother had taught her to learn to control her emotions, but what can we say, she’s an open book and if she’s not on a default rbf — she’s giving face
v relationship phobe - more or less will keep one at arms’ length; the type to make you think you’re close but you don’t really know much about her
will get out of everything and anything but saying she doesn’t speak korean / can’t understand what you’re saying
does not like pity, will not stand to be pitied
smokes like a chimney, we know its bad !!! but girl is stressed !!! and when she’s stressed !! she smokes !!
vain, superficial and far too outgoing and confrontational for her own good (can’t be me lmfao) and will 100% tell you what’s on her mind without prompt
she is an enabler, she will enable you 100% to make bad choices
she only cares about her grandmother really because it’s her validation she seeks the most but lbr she seeks validation everywhere in everyone and that’s kind of her ruin because she also has foot in her mouth syndrome and a temper 😵💫
PLOT HOLES
⤷ honestly give me everything ! we want drama, friction ! friends who try to dip deep, friends who make her angry ! friends who are obviously surface friends but want to be more ! friends who care but are annoyed with lili's aloof attitude ! friends who are no longer friends ! rivals !!!!! i'll take everything and anything anyone comes up with
NOTE
⤷ also i should have her profile with a proper bio finished soon ~ sorry about that xx
୨୧ 、 TAG DUMP
MUSE INSPO & VISUALS
莉莉✽ ₊ muse
莉莉✽ ₊ visual
莉莉✽ ₊ edit
莉莉✽ ₊ instagram
IN CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT
莉莉✽ ₊ headcanon
莉莉✽ ₊ portfolio
莉莉✽ ₊ solo
OTHER
莉莉✽ ₊ out of character
莉莉✽ ₊ pinned
莉莉✽ ₊ plot call
STARTER TITLE ୨୧ @ /
You are lashing out because you’re too sensitive. Yes, I was narrow-minded for a short while. Get over it.
u know that scene in jennifer's body where megan fox puts foundation all over her face in a desperate attempt to look like even a semblance of her old self whose picture she has hanging next to her mirror so she's reminded of the appearance she's lost and she gets a little unhinged during the process and just starts smearing it everywhere? womanhood