U Know That Scene In Jennifer's Body Where Megan Fox Puts Foundation All Over Her Face In A Desperate

“i think i passed him briefly in the makeup trailer.” what lili should have done was introduce herself but what happened to being a gentleman? should lili do everything herself? 

before lili could huff at the comment, he’s retracting it and all lili could do was pout — lips formed, whether because she lost her chance to tease him for it or that she was looking for an outlet to rid her of her nerves.

nerves? around jisoo — who knew.

“sure, i suppose that’s what you meant.” she could only believe him at face value, “how do you know we won’t start a fight in the middle of the shoot — strong personalities and all?” wondering where jisoo’s head was at — to put the two of them together, if that had been the case. lili would have thought it be a disaster — strong personalities often were, especially when pitted against another, if not, stronger one. 

if she chooses not to keep it, he thinks it'd be very amusing if a package arrived for her in the mail anyway - which haru and lili likely would be gifted after it was all over, when the shooting wrapped up, but jisoo isn't going to say that right now, as he definitely is no mind reader and cannot figure lili out - even after all these years, tragic. ( or maybe, the better way to say it is, he can figure her out, but its always better to not say it aloud to dispel the moment. )

the corners of his eyes crease as he smiles, nonplussed at her demeanour. it seems... the shoot will run smoothly? permitting that the two mains don't butt heads. "i mean, you know i can if i am in the corner. just don't put me in the corner, and i won't bite,' clearing his throat, he glances in the direction where she is towards and agrees. "perhaps that may be one of the ones selected. we certainly won't only pick one, so there is some variety." everything seems to be coming aligned, unlike the rarity in the sky that will never occur. but for him, the three of them aligning on the same trajectory was enough.

"have you met your co-star yet?" jisoo must inquire, since it is likely that the dual shots will come soon. "i hope neither of you will chase the other away with respectively, strong personalities in very different ways. its a compliment, i swear," he insists, holding his palms out.

lili laughs, a breath pushed forcibly as she straightens up from her end pose. “you’re much too kind, and you’re probably lying but i’ll take it.”

reaching for her towel, she pats along her forehead before letting it drop to the rest of her belongings. “maybe — maybe a partner would be better.” she sighs, still uncertain with the compromise, finally coming back to sit beside rua.

“you literally read my mind,” lili admits, like a breath of relief to finally be speaking her mind to someone who wasn’t all gung-ho about their current predicament. the others couldn’t wait to express themselves creatively, and yet, all lili felt was exhaustion. “like who am i kidding, i think — i’m just not meant to be choreographing”

it wasn’t to say lili wasn’t creative — no, she could be if she put half the mind into it.

but to be frank, even lili couldn’t fake putting her heart into something that she didn’t really care for — and maybe that was why everything was feeling so wrong. her passion was misplaced, it had only taken now to realize that no matter the excuse she put up — it would always feel wrong because lili wasn’t someone who planned and created, at least not in the form she was in now, no — she was the executioner. 

she was the model to the artist, she would breathe life into the idea — not have the idea, itself. 

( at least, in lili’s not-so-humble opinion )

 “how is your stuff coming along?”

་ ⸼ ⸒ ✴ previously、

as long as lili isn't expecting well, concrete and actually helpful advice, rua is happy to watch whatever the other has come up with so far. even if she didn't know much about techniques and styles and all that, she can at least tell if something is pleasing and nice to watch.

when the song starts playing, rua can already picture the kind of dance that's likely to follow. it screams contemporary (she at least knows that much) but the thing about this genre of dance is that, it's very... free and there's not exactly rules or structure to follow or adhere to, or else it wouldn't be considered that style anymore. to her, one of the defining features of this kind of dance is a flowy-kind of feeling, with some powerful moves when the song hits certain notes or peaks - and that's more or less what she sees when lili starts demonstrating what she's put together so far.

part of her is in awe though, that the other had already come up with this much and although lili calls the movements stiff, rua doesn't think she's giving herself enough credit. "i don't think it looks silly," she says with a light laugh. "it's much better than anything i could've came up with honestly." although that isn't saying much, considering her absolute lack of knowledge and ability to choreograph but that's not the focus here!

"maybe you just need to get used to the movements more?" she suggests, wondering if the 'stiff' feeling lili speaks of is because the dance doesn't feel natural to her yet. "i've barely done any dance like this so i think i'd feel really out of place if i tried to suddenly." but she's not sure if that's really the source of the problem, her just guessing, or a personal issue. "or maybe the moves are meant to be done with a partner?"

໒꒱ . LGC FAMILY CONCERT # 2024  、

she needed this.

what better time of the year to get her mind off of the fact that she was practically an orphan around the holidays. and yes, that was exactly what legacy’s family concert turned out to be: the perfect distraction. 

there is no time for hell raising, no complaints to be said this time — they’ve all been done before and surprisingly, lili had no will to fight them this time around. it’s an oddity, sure, the girl who was so used to having poison for a tongue and fire in her eyes, willingly compliant and obedient to an event she, otherwise, wouldn’t have bat her eyes to. but she was there, day in and day out, practicing like she didn’t already know all the words, repeating each routine and step as if it hadn’t already been engrained into her muscle memory. 

it begs the question:

was something wrong?

it’s a tale she’d never tell. in fact, when questioned by some of her peers, all she does is laugh and reply back:

“what? is it so surprising that i might actually enjoy doing the family concert?”  

because yes — it was surprising.

and perhaps enjoy was too strong of a word.

it was a nice relieve to the mundane and her constant woe is me that came with the autumn holidays. it was just nice to think about something else, really.

when the day comes, lili finds herself lost in the bustle — the craziness of family concert that she doesn’t really have the time to think about how her grandmother had sent her away with a pamphlet of money and her well-wishes typed into a text message read by an assistant who cared enough to take the two hour flight from beijing. 

and with all things considered, as she’s mouthing to so hot, laughing against the crowd’s roars, arms linked with jiah, lili can only think — thank god, i get to do this all over again tomorrow.

finally peace and quiet — the perfect place to dish out her grievances without the annoying coaches butting their unnecessary comments in rebuttal to lili’s own annoying complaints.

she was not some dancing monkey at the circus who could work for peanuts — or was it bananas, irrelevant! — lili needed her breaks ( and a place to complain, freely ), too. it wasn’t like she was the only one who had been idling during the break — she was in the middle of an important phone call!

( sure, it had just been a small here and there of whispered complaints to seojin about how she hated catallena with a burning passion but it wasn’t not important as one of the coaches had said — it was important to lili, there was merit in her complaints, alright! )

sliding her phone back into her pocket, she pries herself out of the restroom she had holed herself in to avoid the coaches other unmentionable and otherwise unwarranted pieces of advice when she had received maylin’s text that it was time to go back. 

faced with another trainee — so, that was who had come bustling in with the slammed door and all — lili looks her once over. noticing the slight leveling of the other’s breath, she wonders if she should intrude — the other did look like she was trying to find a moment of peace. obviously another person who couldn’t find such in the stuffy practice room — a thought lili feels induce a smirk of satisfaction, one she stamps out immediately when she notices the water on the other’s cheek.

stilling her movements, lili goes to wash her hands, quietly — trying to find leeway for a conversation, wondering if she should even start one. 

( she didn’t really care for it but lili just couldn’t help but want to pry — )

drying her hands on a paper towel, lili pretends to fuss for a second, maybe two, before she reaches for another towel and hands it to the other girl. “sarang, right?” she makes a movement with her other hand, tapping at her cheek as if to say ‘you have something on your face’. “they’re telling us that we have to head back.” 

it had just been a pretty shit day.

it started with her class, those outside of legacy. sarang wasn't sure if it was something as simple as waking up on the wrong side of the bed but she felt off from the moment she opened her eyes. that feeling only increased as she made her way through the day. but that was horrible enough but then it came to training and it felt like an out of body experience.

she thought she'd be fine with 'ah-choo' but nothing was coming together. mistakes had been made, moves missed, her voice wasn't strong enough. nothing was right and that only served to stress her out more because she hated getting things wrong. for someone who chased perfection, anything less than that was earth shattering. it didn't help that it was public either.

by the time they finally broke for a break, sarang only took a seconds of inching towards the door before she bolted for the bathroom. she headed straight for a mirror, quietly trying to talk herself down.

bad days happened but this one was rough. rough enough that she had to splash some water on her face and take the time to breathe. right now, she knew she didn't paint the prettiest of pictures, bend over the sink that she sick, breathing just a tad too heavily. it'd past, it had too. she had to get back before they started practicing.

@lgclili

@LGCENT just posted a photo!

angel of mine  ꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱  

#lgctrainees #lgcent #xulili

@LGCENT just posted a photo!

some people are worth melting for 🤍❄️ 

#lgctrainees #lgcent #xulili

“no, no —” her hand immediately shoots out to take chaekyung’s arm again, raising the other’s hand to her forehead again. “check it again, i definitely feel something coming on.”

when the rouse is called — lili frowns. method acting, her ass! “everyone does that when they feel faint — me, i’m everyone and i feel faint, i swear it.”

she didn’t feel faint — but how was chaekyung to know? weren’t symptoms like these supposed to be subjective? 

“maybe it’s because your hands are so cold.” it was definitely not because lili wanted to be escorted out of this bird-infested hell.

( just when she had thought they had finished another trainee returns with a ha! just then — lili feels her eyes roll to the back of her head, her blood running cold )

"fine, be that way, abandon me in my time of need!"

she did as she was told, bringing her hand to lili's forehead to check her temperature. huh. the warmth of her skin felt normal. chaekyung wrapped her arm around the older female, this time placing her hands on both of their foreheads to compare temperatures. nothing. her hands weren't that cold, so she should have felt it if lili's temperature was higher.

her eyes narrowed as she squinted at lili. "your temperature's fine... and you look," she paused, scanning her from head to toe, "totally healthy." chaekyung let out a gasp followed by a low whisper, "your acting's so bad, unnie. the moment you said 'oh' followed by my name, you gave yourself away." as she said that, she pulled her arm away and gently pushed lili back so she could stand on her own. "nobody does that when they feel faint."

XU LILI '01 / B. BEIJING, RAISED IN LA .

hellooooooo ~ this is nini again with a second character who's definitely a whole 180 approach from jino lol. took me a while to get an intro up because end of the year things kept me busy ! and i was also still trying to figure out how best to explain little miss lili here ~ but nevertheless, we're here now and down below you can get a good idea of this gal who is both bite and bark and will very much prove it !!! but i promise she can be nice even if it comes off haughty and self-serving so please like if you'd like to plot ♡

TL;DR signed jul. 2020, female senior morning group, female dorm a; self-serving, self-absorbed and overly self-concious? yet deep, deep, deep down she has a heart of gold? just got to dig deep enough underneath all her generational trauma lol

BACKGROUND

born li yifei, her name was legally changed to xu yifei when she got adopted by her grandmother / it was further changed when she gained dual citizenship through her grandmother when she moved her to los angeles -> now she goes by xu lili

her parents were a love that burned hot but burned out fast kind of relationship

also didn't help that her dad and mom were from starkly different social brackets that when her grandmother strongly opposed the marriage, her mother got disowned and left to be with her husband

but when the marriage ultimately fell apart, in a last ditch effort, they had lili

for a while it worked until the pains of motherhood, marriage and poverty got too much and when she turned 5, her parents divorced: her mother got her and her father got his freedom back — apparently that meant never seeing lili again, too

a year after her divorce, her mother met a new man (richer, older) and started a new family alongside that man’s children from a prev. marriage. by the time she was 7, lili was brought back to her grandmother’s and like her father, that would be the last she’d see of her mother

being adopted by her grandmother was a start to a new life, adapting to a new environment and learning that love wasn’t just given: it was earned

her grandmother was the owner of a real estate investment / development group; a woman of high expectations and most of all, showed love like how she did business: she expected results in return for her nurture

in the case of lili: her grandmother enrolled her into all the best programs, nurtured her love for performing, and expected the excellence that proceeded from the investment

but excellence can only go so far with natural talent, lili had the talent but in comparison to her peers, she didn’t have the it needed to take her far, something she learns when she receives no offers to continue her ballet career

( 2017 ) instead, she looks elsewhere to continue her love, to find adoration elsewhere is null when her grandmother is pressuring her for results: she auditions for a company in la and passes; suddenly she’s on a flight to korea and training to debut in a girl group of some unknown company

just when she was about to debut, her grandmother ends up sick and she went home when she was supposed to be practicing/preparing for debut

( 2020 ) she ends up getting dropped from the debut lineup upon return (and still has the audacity to be sad about it) ~

she joins lgc in jul. 2020 after getting dropped from debut and consequently the label

TIDBITS

much prefers to be called lili

was quiet and withdrawn as a kid because of her parental troubles, only was able to really fully express herself through performing

because of that she was able to come out of her shell, however, it was falsified by the desperate need of validation and her inherent ego that waged a war with her insecurities 

has imposter syndrome, so she on the low sabotages herself

such as when she was supposed to debut, she knew what was at stake but still left -> her grandmother didn’t even appreciate her visiting when she was sick, instead she was told to go back to korea and finish what she started

headstrong and stubborn, her grandmother had brought her up to say what was on her mind and not care about others -> it only made her selfish and self-serving

a bit of a tsundere, if you squint but i swear it’s there, she’s not used to people being overly affectionate to her and is very rarely affectionate; will be the one to give an awkward shoulder pat when comforting

honestly because of her parents she doesn't believe in love, thinks it's superficial, thinks lust is also dumb but what can a girl do when she has needs 💅 might also think she's hard to love / doesn't deserve it because of her trauma from her parents and her grandmother

is 100% right, always, even when she is 100% wrong — will argue why she’s right

she likes being as she says ~ playful ~ and riling people up and causing friction, call it what you will but i think it’s the attention-seeker in her thinking that even if she can’t get people to like her, if they’re irritated, that means they have to be thinking about her still? right ???

ambitious to a fault, she will do what she needs to do to get where she wants to, even if that means burning some bridges

her grandmother had taught her to learn to control her emotions, but what can we say, she’s an open book and if she’s not on a default rbf — she’s giving face

v relationship phobe - more or less will keep one at arms’ length; the type to make you think you’re close but you don’t really know much about her 

will get out of everything and anything but saying she doesn’t speak korean / can’t understand what you’re saying

does not like pity, will not stand to be pitied

smokes like a chimney, we know its bad !!! but girl is stressed !!! and when she’s stressed !! she smokes !!

vain, superficial and far too outgoing and confrontational for her own good (can’t be me lmfao) and will 100% tell you what’s on her mind without prompt

she is an enabler, she will enable you 100% to make bad choices

she only cares about her grandmother really because it’s her validation she seeks the most but lbr she seeks validation everywhere in everyone and that’s kind of her ruin because she also has foot in her mouth syndrome and a temper 😵‍💫

PLOT HOLES

⤷  honestly give me everything ! we want drama, friction ! friends who try to dip deep, friends who make her angry ! friends who are obviously surface friends but want to be more ! friends who care but are annoyed with lili's aloof attitude ! friends who are no longer friends ! rivals !!!!! i'll take everything and anything anyone comes up with

NOTE

⤷   also i should have her profile with a proper bio finished soon ~ sorry about that xx

here or —

“since july, it’s only been a couple months.” if lili put it altogether, she would have been a trainee for three years and a handful of months but who was counting — ever since she had got dropped earlier that year from her last company, it had seemed like time was infinite and she was stuck at the pit a of a sandglass.

slowly awaiting for it to swallow her whole.

even whilst joining a new company, lili often wondered what the fuck she was still doing in korea — then again, did she have anywhere else to return to if not here?

“have you been  here long?”

the other’s inquiries are interesting — not something she’s asked often and it does park a small, amused smile to her lips. compelled to the humor the other, she shrugs. “as often as you’d see a celebrity here, so i guess — quite often? if you hear the click of a camera, you’d think they were on every block.” los angeles had been a home for a good while — a place lili could only dream of once upon a dream — now she called it her hometown, how funny. “anywhere is dangerous if you go looking hard enough for it.” 

“nope,” she shakes her head, not that she ever would want to. “i don’t think i ever well, i don’t do scary things and i heard australia is full of them.”

❛ Oh no, I agree. Sometimes the coaches here can be too much. How long have you been a trainee, if I may ask? ❜ Amelia was curious how long the other girl had been here if she was still not used to how the trainers were in Legacy.

Upon hearing where the other was from, Amelia perked up slightly. ❛ Oh the infamous LA! Wow! I've always wanted to visit LA. I've heard a lot about it. Is it true you can see celebrities on the street or is it just a rumour? How is it by the way? I've heard it's beautiful but also dangerous. ❜ Amelia's face shifted slightly but not too much to alert the coach who was still as confused as before.

❛ Oh me? I'm from Australia! Though I'm not sure how much of my accent shows. ❜ She chuckled. ❛ Have you ever been? ❜

BY GOOD WILL OR GOOD LUCK? is this lili being nice or is it just luck? — @lgckyoka

one would think — if you’ve been through one thing, something similar to it would be a breeze?

well, to lili, she’d say you were dead wrong. 

( because no two things could be the same, there was always something different )

thankfully, this was not one of those times — these were one of the times she’s able to bless her lucky stars for being so god-damned, four-leaf clover lucky. but perhaps luck had nothing to do with it — because, again, if you’ve been through one thing, you’ve been through it all. 

and since lili had painstakingly gone through grueling work to learn japanese just for some mock hosting gig that never saw the light of day — to do it again, but in korean — a language she would say she was a little more than familiar with, well — lili would tell you she just won the lottery.

that is how lucky she thinks such a task is.

a breeze, it would be — despite her initial belief ( read above ) — because wasn’t hosting all about self confidence? and apparently, lili had that in spades.

and by her good fortune — maybe she was feeling nice or maybe she felt bad for kyoka — she saddles up next to the other after an afternoon lesson, glancing over at the other’s notes before pointing at a phrase she notices with her sparkly pink pen. 

“is this what you wrote for the exercise earlier? the one about improvising a music show scene?”