Tony: Hey Son, Heard You Got An A+

The Meme Bros™️: Playdate

Peter, in a high voice, holding a Barbie: Hey Ken, I was thinking about, you know, maybe taking the year off? Going back to school and starting my career?

Shuri, in a deep voice, holding a Ken: Nonsense, Barbie. You’re staying home and having my kids.

Okoye: Kids, what are you playing?

Shuri: Systemic Opression.

Symbrock shippers are literally the horniest people alive.

Shuri, squinting at Peter: I like your shoelaces.

Peter, eyes sparkling: Thanks! I stole them from the president!

Steve: Wait, what?

if there will be a venom movie sequel, eddie needs to call venom love or dear at least every other sentence, otherwise whats the point

I can’t believe I’m gonna die in a secret Russian base with Steve “The Hair” Harrington.

Host: Welcome to Red Lobster, how many?

Eddie: Just one and ah can I be seated in the lobster tank please? Oh and I'll order two lobster.

Venom: I want mines alive.

Eddie: Cook one lobster and leave the second one alive please.

Host:???????

Sebastian Stan + The Martian 🚀

Venom: I'm a bad motherfucker mmkay? I'll eat HER head, I'll eat HIS head, I'll eat MY OWN head. I don't care about anything or anyone so fuck this planet and fuck you in particular you're sushi for the taking

Eddie: *walks in, stumbles and falls flat on his face*

Venom:

Venom: Look I'm the softest bitch you'll ever meet all I wanna do is eat chocolate marry this human trashbag over there and have like six kids

New Yorkers during Infinity War be like 

I will not be taking any questions at this time.