Jason: I Just Finished A 239 Page Book In Like An Hour, Look At Me Go :)

...33

Jason: alright, listen up you little shits

Jason: not you, Salim, you’re an angel and i’m glad you’re here

Zain with Tariq in town: I did that adult thing you can do where you buy an entire cake and just eat it.

Zain: I am eating an entire cake.

Zain: Update: there is more cake than I imagined.

Zain: I see now why my dad didn’t let me do this.

Rachel: Want to take a stab at being social?

Clarisse: I do like stabbing.

Zain: I can’t find my phone

Jason: I can call it for you

Zain: wait no-

Phone ringing: you are my dad (your my dad) BOOGIE WOOGIE WOOGIE

Zain:

Jason:

Zain: I can explain-

Nick: We need to get through this locked door. Eric, give me your credit card.

Eric: Here.

Nick, pocketing it: Jason, break down the door.

Eric: The Middle East is on the brink of war-

Salim: Brink???

Nick: *throws shade*

Rachel: pick it up. Now. 

Jason, who has only seen Mary Poppins once and can't quite remember the plot: ??? So which is it????

Jason: You have that glint in your eye that either says 'I'm Mary Poppins' or 'I'm going to dump your body in that chasm river.'

Salim: We'll never know which it is!

Rachel: We don't need to know about your asphyxiation kink.

Merwin: My tinctures?

Rachel: No, I said we don't need to know about your asphyxiation kink.

Merwin: Oh, I thought you said tinctures.

Rachel: Why the FUCK would I say tinctures???