Experiment-48 - Failed Experiment

me when phantom shift(I’m also incapable of sitting normally apparently)

i was born from a lab experiment in which researchers worked to synthesize a person who “deserved it” (paper fails to clarify what was meant by this)

had phantom pain in my tail all day today. i couldn't get my tail to stop being underneath me so i sat on it the entire shift at work and it kept aching :(

kept having a tingling sensation on the back of my neck and shoulder too. must have been my hackles being raised the entire time :(

untitled

you can call me 48 or eighter for short. i prefer he/it pronouns. i am 25 in human years. reanimated wolfdog corpse. radioactive mutant lab experiment.

i post abt my life as a mutant undead wolfdog. i am schizophrenic + psychotic + very anti-social. i am timid, so i do not respond to messages or replies quickly. i promise that im a nice guy, my bark is worse than my bite.

hopefully looking to find other lab experiments or similar creatures and make some friends :3 the scientists want me to practice socializing with others more.

no dni. i block freely. i will be posting nsfw posts occasionally so minors dni. please only message me if you are over 18, thank you.

more info abt my me below...

i am a lab experiment created by humans. i do not know for what reasons, but i know that i was a failed experiment. i have been allowed to wander off on my own, but i am still monitored by scientists.

i am a wolfdog who was reanimated and brought back to life by the scientists. my base dna has been modified heavily so my form tends to be very unstable and changes with my emotions. the more threatened or emotional i am, the more mutated my form becomes.

I am physically an undead wolfdog, whose DNA has been modified and mutated through experimentation. this has caused the side effect of me being very radioactive and my form can change depending on my emotions. (example: my body can grow extra legs and eyes and jaws.)

i am heavily radioactive and my base coat glows a soft blue. my bodily fluids contain very concentrated amounts of radioactive materials (blood, saliva, sweat). i tend to avoid humans and most creatures for this reason, as to not cause harm.

i am part of the snare trap system. I'll probably discuss fellow headmates sometimes but this is my own personal blog so its my space only. uhh the main system host is @an0nsleuth

this is not a roleplay blog btw...i am actually a radioactive mutant experiment and i will be discussing my life experiences. reality checking is not welcome unless requested. piss me off and you will be blocked.

tagging system:

tba

will make this look better in the future.

im starting to suspect that we (the snare trap system) is another layer to the poke system.

its weird. the main system still seems to be stuck in this headspace of "we are a teen and we are still in the trauma". while our system feels more...like an actual adult? and we are able to step away from the trauma better.

the main system is stuck in the events still. like they are in a whirlpool. and we are outside observers. but we also existed in there at some point? we are just...not them anymore.

idk how else ro describe it. maybe layer is not the right term.

but the main system feels like they are still stuck in the "we are in the active abuse events". when it has been years since that has ended. we are in a safer and better place now kinda. still live with one of our kinda abusers? the main one is gone. so we are...safer than before.

it feels strange to have this sense of calm compared to Dune. Dune and I are probably the most connected out of the two systems. even Dune and Sonar are not as...similar as we are.

i feel like im a more mellow version of it. in some ways ig.

idk.

ig i shouldn't dig up too much before a stressful day. everyone in the main system is panicking and losing it. they are so scared of disappointing others. to be able to be so aware and step away from those feelings. that is what convinces me that i am totally separate from them.

i am aware i am not in the bad situation anymore. the main system is not. they still think they are a teen in many ways. i do not. they think that they are still under main abusers watch. i know that we are not.

i am clear headed rn. they are not...i wish i could help them. but their head space is like a mine field. and they are huddled in the middle of it.

i cant approach. i can only observe. Dune and Sonar are vaguely aware of me amd the others but they cannot reach us. i can see their emotions and thoughts and feelings but i cant go and talk to them.

its like being able to log into another computer in read only mode. i cannot modify anything. i can only observe. i try to leave "sticky notes" and such to help them but I know as soon as i stop fronting. there will be chaos again.

...i worry about them. but there is not much more i can do. :(

i just have to try and believe that they will be ok tomorrow.