An Interesting Sci-fi Short Story From 4chan.

omg leaked season 7 footage of tcw!! siege of mandalore looks so good

albaparthenicevelut replied to your post: You know, having read Master and Apprentice now, I…

Obi Wan’s first 10 years as a knight are just ‘Please find Master Jinn and Padawan Skywalker and talk them back from the Outer Rim/a hidden fortress/abandoned Jedi Temple/the nearest tall tree.’

Obi Wan hitting bushes and trees on Dagobah with a long stick: “Qui Gon??? Anakin???!! Master Yoda says you have to come back to Coruscant now! Don’t make me erase the taped episodes of Flower of Varykino from your TiVo!!!!”

GOD, yes, you know that Obi-Wan somehow would have ended up even MORE exhausted in this AU. In many ways it’s like he somehow got knighted and then was immediately given two Padawans, one of whom is FULL DAMN OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW BETTER.

Anakin’s probably constantly showing up at Obi-Wan’s quarters, eyes as wide as saucers, breathlessly saying his Dramatic Possibly-Last Goodbye to Obi-Wan, because this time Master Jinn is POSITIVE that he’s figured it all out, and they need to go to Ilum and do some ritual he read about on an ancient scroll, and they need to go NOW or this whole Prophecy thing is going to fall apart and the SITH SHALL TRIUMPH OBI-WAN OH MY GOD. Anakin thought Obi-Wan was hard to read sometimes? CAN YOU IMAGINE ANAKIN DEALING WITH QUI-GON AND HIS NON-EXPLANATIONS AND MYSTERIOUS VAGUE STATEMENTS AND SECRET ARCHIVE VISITS THAT HE WON’T TALK TO ANAKIN ABOUT? His poor brain would be scrambled so fast. 

Obi-Wan, half-asleep, is just like “All right Anakin, very well, goodbye then. Please make sure to leave on the homing beacon this time so that I can find you when you both inevitably get trapped in a cave within 24 hours.” 

I have $24 to last me til Friday, what should I buy with it?

Padme “no concept of my own mortality” Amidala teaming up with Anakin “no impulse control” Skywalker to catch her own assassin. There’s no way this can go wrong

after getting fed up of hearing sokka gently implore zuko to consider “using logic and reason to solve his problems” for the umpteenth time, zuko decides that instead of actually giving serious consideration to this all but impossible advice, he will simply name his swords Logic and Reason, and that’s that problem solved. sokka’s only response is to roll his eyes and deadpan, “wow, I bet you think you’re very clever.”

of course, zuko does think he’s very clever, and so he brags about it in a letter to katara, who finds it equally hilarious. and when the time comes for sokka to make the same plea to katara (which doesn’t take long, mind you) she just says, “but I already do solve all my problems with logic and reason,” and holds up two fists. sokka is even less impressed the second time around, because it’s not even an original joke.

and then suki gets involved. meet her fans, Logic and Reason. and toph’s two giant boulders, which, when she crushes them together, create the center at which ideas meet. not to mention mai’s knives, among which are Thinking Things Through, Rationality, and Common Sense.

it is one day that azula laments that she wishes people would employ logic & reason more often and sokka, sick to death of this joke that was barely funny the first time, goes “oh, let me guess, they’re these two giant bodyguards who shoot lava out of their hands.” and azula’s just like “no wtf??? it’s the process of using critical thinking to make decisions????”

sokka’s like “really?? it’s not the tiny knives in your hair or various poisons or anything like that???” and azula seems genuinely concerned that he’s hit his head on a very hard surface. at which point sokka must acquiesce to the fact that azula might be his sole ally in this matter, which truly defies all logic and reason.

Road Trip

[Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Ahsoka, traveling through space] Anakin: [piloting while drinking a soda through a straw] [still drinking] [runs out of soda] [still making loud drinking noises] Obi-Wan: [slight eyelid twitch] Ahsoka: [playing something on her phone] This…is really boring. Can we stop for a bathroom break? Anakin: There’s a refresher on the ship, Snips.  Ahsoka: [dramatic sigh] I just wanted to get a change of scenery. This is taking forever! Obi-Wan: Now now, Ahsoka, patience is an essential element of being a Jedi. [sotto voce] How much longer do we have left, Anakin? It’s been ages. Shouldn’t we be home by now? Anakin: Not too much longer. [under his breath] About three days.  Ahsoka: What?! Obi-Wan: Three days?!  Anakin: Well I thought I’d discovered this great shortcut. That maybe turned out to be a hyperspace lane going in the opposite direction. And normally I would have noticed sooner but I kind of…fell asleep.  Obi-Wan: Anakin! Ahsoka: [covering her face with a travel pillow] Oh my gods…three more days of this… Anakin: Well I’m sorry, but it sure seems like my former Master should have woken me up, except that the old man fell asleep earlier than I did! Obi-Wan: Oh, so this is my fault? You choosing an unapproved alternate route without telling anyone is on me? Ahsoka: [throws a candy wrapper at Anakin’s head] Anakin: Young lady, that is not model Padawan behavior! [takes another long, loud sip from his empty soda] Obi-Wan: [scowling at him] As if you’d know anything about model Padawan behavior.  Anakin: [throws the candy wrapper at Obi-Wan]  Obi-Wan: I feel my point is proven.  Anakin: [pointedly takes another drink] Ahsoka: Oh my GODS, please STOP DRINKING THAT! Obi-Wan: [grabs it out of his hand and throws the can across the room] This! Bloody thing! Is empty! [all three of them yelling at each other] Mace: [popping up via holo-Skype] Kenobi, Skywalker, Padawan Tano: is everything all right? We expected you back by now. Do you need assistance?  Anakin: [nodding] Oh, Master Windu, we’re fine. Just a little…uh… Obi-Wan: …traffic! Congestion. A very large…construction…project.  Ahsoka: [nodding and smiling] My Masters have got it all figured out. Don’t you worry, Master Windu! We’ll be home soon! 

i love writing luke’s tendency to be a feral little man like Yes he’s the savior of the galaxy Yes he’s a pure hearted beam of sunshine BUT he came from a hick town in the Outer Rim with nothing to do but hang out in bars and use ROUSes as target practice AND he shares DNA with anakin skywalker so he can drink Han under the table and thinks traffic laws are a joke send tweet

Star Wars: The Clone Wars | “Gungan General”

an episode of the clone wars

yoda, hitting a bong: stole a fuckton of holocrons, the cowboy did

ahsoka: well ok! let’s just stab him until he gives them back

anakin: haha y-

obiwan:

anakin:

obiwan:

ahsoka:

anakin: no ahsoka……. it’s not the jedi way

Me thinking about how Ahsoka canonically thought of Anakin and Obi-wan as her adoptive family and even told people she was adopted: