Just Realized What I Want- I Want Someone Who Will Be There For Me When I Wake Up Drunk At 4:21am And

help i can't sleep the west wing theme song is playing on loop in my head

so storytime. last august i met up with my cousin and his friend who had just moved up here, but tbh i didn't really have fun (probs has to do with the fact that they grew up in a Very different tax bracket and we thus have Very different views on life, politics, morals, etc....). so when he requested to follow me on instagram i ignored it for like. two months until i felt bad and accepted and followed him back. he then dm'd (just to clarify, he has a gf i think he's just lonely in a new city and would like a friend) and we dm'd a little until i decided to just ghost him bc i was so over it :D fast forward to last week i was feeling guiltier than usual about my past actions and decided to just dm him back feigning apologies. and now we're hanging out friday and he wants my number to determine the time? like why sir we r communicating just fine via instagram. i don't need another form of communication through which i must ghost you when neither of us have fun on friday. so anyways i hate myself

so you know how i was dreading the hangout on friday? well what if it goes well and he invites me to a kickback with his friends who r all very rich too and i get to be friends with a bunch of rich people in a good way and find a rich boyfriend like what if bc that sounds really fun to me

aaaaaaaaaand then after ur emo break someone makes everything feel okay <3 i love my manager sometimes

istg if i don't move out soon i'm buying a fkn vape i've tried so hard to fight it but sometimes a girl's gotta smoke a joint in the bathtub and she can't do that with her parents next door

wow someone's really stressing me out i'm really fighting the urge to buy some cigs :)

it's 3:28am and i am so exhausted but i literally cannot fall asleep because i am too excited to eat pizza tmrw why am i literally a rat in nyc

i miss my friends

why r men so gross like ew

fuck yeah just did yoga feel fresh and new and peaceful and calm intentions have been set body has been stretched and exercised i am so fkn ready to get ready for bed and attack tomorrow