🤔

I cannot be more serious, there is nothing better. There is nothing better than the feeling I feel when I'm with God. I went years running around doing all kinds of stupid things before I met Him, but He calmed my heart the same way He calmed the storm. Anxiety fled, lust died, anger wained, grief packed up and left, and He moved in.

You may think I'm crazy. An idiot who never learned to question. A traditional bum who can't open her mind to new ideas. Even an uneducated fool spouting whatever false tales.

You may think I'm in need. A victim to white men who drilled this religous crap into my head. A kid who doesn't even know better, she'll wake up once she get's old enough.

You may think I'm evil. A weirdo out of my mind who only lives to shame others. A cultists trying to drag others down with me. A judgemental, sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic, trump supporting conservative who can't understand that sometimes she isn't right.

Well let me explain something

I'm sane. I question everything, the how, the why, the what, the who, the when. I adopt new ideas all the time, only the difference is, I have boundries when it comes to ideas trying to pull me away from the Word of God. I'm educated, and I plan to become a professor.

I'm not a victim. I chose this path for myself, no person or group manipulated me into it (besides, it's not a white man's religoun, it's middle eastern). I may be a kid, but the things I've seen and felt was something even a toddler could identify as unmistakenly God.

I'm not evil. I don't shame people, thinking they're gross or whatnot just because we don't share the same beliefs, I pray for them and their wellbeing. I'm not a cultist and I would never willingly drag anyone down if I knew what I was following was false, in fact, I wouldn't even be in it myself. I don't look at any gender, race, occupation, status, or sexuality and think I'm looking at devil's incarnate, just a person like me and everyone else who doesn't know the goodness of God (Also, I'm not even a republican and I'm well aware I'm wrong sometimes).

Contrary to many beliefs, I'm not as bad as people try and peg me to be. I'm just a kid trying her best in a world where nobody ever looks back on the weak. I'm just a kid who struggles to make friends or relate to people. I'm just a kid that wants to love and be loved. Trying to understand, find my way, do what's right and be truly happy.

I'm just a child.

God's child.

I just went to sweet frogs and on the way and my family was discussing politics and how America may or may not survive these 4 years long enough to fix it back up. It had gotten me pretty down cuz it looked pretty grim when this happened:

Mom: Don't be so down, at least you're still here.

Me: Yeah, but for how long?

Mom: As long as Jesus says so.

The moment she said that, I felt so much better. I had forgotten who was in control. But knowing nothing can happen unless God let's it happen makes me feel sooo much better.

God works :)

Jesus still loves you. Let that settle. He still loves you. Before you existed, He loved you. Before you knew Him, He loved you. When you were in the middle of your sin, He loved you. While you repented, He loved you. When you refused to repent, He loved you. When you cursed Him, He loved you. When you denied Him, He loved you. When you ignored Him, He loved you. When you prayed, He loved you. When you cried, He loved you. When you screamed, He loved you. When you were hurt, He loved you. When you were content, He loved you. There was never a moment He did not love you. He has always loved you, just as He said he would, so much so that He died in your place for things He did not do. He did all that simply because He loves you so much that He wants you by His side. All He asks is that you love and honor Him. Please don't reject His love.

Aktugawa plz why

Ok, so if you haven't seen bungou stray dogs season 5, this is a spoiler. Proceed with that in mind.

Aktugawa's ability can manipulate clothing right? Is there a specific reason why he can't use the clothes on someoneelse's back or what? Like I love my boy Aku, but my dude would be so overpowered if he just used his head. Ik he can use more than his coat cuz he used his shirt on the ship in season 5, so unless they were both of some special material, he can use any cloth. Bsd could have been so much shorter if my dude just stabbed and sliced everyone with the clothes on their backs. Like the only way to dodge that is to strip down to nothing, and I don't think anybody's gonna do that, or at least think to do so immediently. We could have killed Fukuichi so easily if we just kept stabbing him with his OWN clothes. I love you Atsushi, but we can all agree that if Aktugawa just used that move when they first met, bsd would have been an episode long.

I'm not defenseless as long as I can pray

Soo I just discovered this thing called artfight. AND I WANT IN SO BAD. But I'm a stupid loser and I'm too wimp to actually try it out cuz communities scare me and I feel like I won't actually be interacting with people and instead sit in my sad corner by my sad self the whole event.

That and when I made myself an account, I misspelled my username without realizing and now I have no idea what my username actually is and therfore can't login to my account nor participate.

And they have a contact to fix this kind of issue but, again, I am a little loser baby who's too embarrassed to ask for help.

I hate myself.

OK FINE AFTER SOME THOUGHT AND REALIZING IT'S IN ONE WEEK I DECIDED TO ASK FOR HELP AND JOIN. I REGRET MY BIRTH

UPDATE, I WAS JUST BEING DUMB. TURNS OUT I NEVER ACTUALLY FINISHED THE REGISTER CUZ I HAD A SPACE IN MY NAME. I JUST SIGNED IN AND I CAN JOIN NOW.

I JUST REALIZED I HAVE 6 DAYS TO CREATE GOOD LOOKING CHARACTER SHEETS FOR ALL MY CHARACTERS AND IM FREAKIN OUT.

Christians will be persecuted. Always. But I just want to point out, that what used to be, and in some places still are, persecution, is different than the kind of persecution others will face. Crucification, execution, torture and death now turn into sarcastic jabs, angry yelling and hateful glares. Both are pretty scary, but think of what used to be the punishment compared to now. I am so guilty of this, as I am very shy and outspoken. I plan my entire conversation before even initiating it when I simply want to ask for a pencil. I count the amount of sniffles I have to make and panic at 5 because I feel like I'm disturbing people. I hate attention, I really do, especially bad attention. So I avoid talking about faith in public because of this unspoken rule in society that says religon is a forbidden topic. Let's all just be glad we aren't in a hydrolic press and that all we'll get is side glances

Ok wait am I stupid?

Ok so I just had a dumb question pop into my mind out of nowhere. I randomly just figured this out and I NEED someone to explain to me.

So, Dazai met chuuya when they were 15, which is why it's called the 15 manga and ark. So, if they were 15 back then and they're 22 now, doing subtraction, it's been 7 years since they met, right? Ok that adds up, because they always mention how their partnership has gone on for said many years. HOWEVER, Dazai left the port mafia 4 years ago and was in hiding the whole time. Subtract 4 from 7 and, correct me if I'm being dumb, but that leaves 3. They've been partners for 3 years. Not 7. Not 6. But 3. Have I been lied to or am I overthinking this? I NEED ANSWERS PLEASE

Idk, I just thought of it lol

I love many things in this show. Story, jokes, culture, characters, art style, even the sometimes ear wrenching dub, but none of it tops my man Wolfram over here. He's my favorite, yes, because he's a typical pretty boy, but also because he has this dumb ability to be the damsel in distress every dang episode. Like he's a literal genderbended princess peach at this point. I recommend watching the show, so I don't wanna spoil it for people. If you wanna see the dumb list of events this poor prince has been through, continue further.

• Proposed to by a stranger, a human no less (at war with humans and to his kind, they're seen as mean and ugly creatures)

• Be strangled by a water dragon by fiancé

• Fall into a sandpit while being attacked by a huge bear.

• Always falls sick when in human territory

•Went missing

•Attacked by bandits at least 10 times in just the 1st season out of 3

•Always seasick

•Kidnapped about 3 times from the top of my head, yes its been more

•MULTIPLE CASES OF LITERAL POSSESION, they just can't keep they're hands off his poor delicate body

• LITERAL DEATH. YES. HE DIED. LIKE DED. HEART STOPPED, NO PRANK, COLD AS ICE, DED

• Held captive

•In the manga he had a coma possesion

•Getting his literal heart stolen. Literally. Like reach into his chest and take out the organ. I'm not talking about him falling in love with Yuuri

• In the novel, Yuuri stabbed him

• Yuuri almost obliterated him

• Got shot with an arrow

• This btw is off the top of my head, meaning out of the 3 seasons, this isn't even all of it.