Where your favorite blogs come alive
we gotta stop pretending that anakin skywalker was a normal happenstance. it’s not every day that a bull moose breaks into a stash of cocaine, busts into an elementary school and stomps a classroom of children to death, and then spends the next twenty years murdering the shit out of every other moose it ever sees in all its life until it finally commits quasi-patricide by throwing its dad into the ocean. other jedi fell to the dark side of the force, and they killed, what, a couple people? other jedi are touched by the dark side, which means they really just had a pissy week? anakin touches the dark side and kills a few dozen people. anakin falls to the dark side of the force and then murders or attempts to murder almost everyone who ever knew him in middle school. anakin falls to the dark side of the force and then storms the jedi knitting club and starts cracking heads on the pavement. within ten minutes he has saddled up to go balls-to-the-window balls-to-the-wall batshit, he stops at the bodega by the jedi temple to shotgun a four loko and a sugar free monster energy before immediately proceeding to kill like a thousand fucking people with a sword