Asd - Blog Posts

The ‘you’re mature for your age’ to sleeping with a bed full of plushies in your mid twenties pipeline is real

• this user is on the autism spectrum •

Dude gave me autism and trust issues/ trouble opening up to others and made me easily distracted & I procrastinate a lot

But just imagine how powerful we must've been without those... he feared us. Just think about how strong we must still be?! Incredibly strong.

rb and tag with how god nerfed you. he nerfed me by making me lactose intolerant

It sucks. Only last year or so I've learned about this and how it's common among people with autism. I tend to feel bad and unproductive for struggling to start something.

executive dysfunction be like *wants to do something* *doesnt do it* *feels bad* *wants to do something* *doesnt do it* *feels bad* *wants to do something* *doesnt do it* *feels ba

I hate:

How often I need to go to therapy

How my mom treats my mental health

How my mom reacts to my choice to set boundaries

How my mom reacts to my plan in the future

The fact that my mom doesn’t like me having in person friends because she needs to drive me

The fact that even my best friends mom sees my moms flaws

The fact that I can’t do what I’m supposed to for my age but my mom refuses to get me diagnosed with ASD so I don’t have any conformation

The fact that the only person who treats me like I’m enough is my best friend

My English teacher

That one bitch in all my classes

All the stupid things my mom yells at me for

The fact that my mom said “I worry about you but I worry about how much you’re missing school for this” in response to me explain that my therapist wants me to go back next week

In conclusion: I am burnt out and can’t distinguish emotions except being angry and missing my best friend. Everything else feels muted and hopeless

This is cooool!!!!

I made this a long time ago but for some reason never posted! It is my quick guide to protecting yourself against burnout as a person with ADHD and ASD.

Of course it is all about meeting your support needs at the end of the day, which are completely individual and may vary over time, but this could function as a guide if you have a hard time figuring out where to start! 🫶🏻 💙💙💙

One thing I need allistics to understand is that autistic people often have wildly different perspectives of what conversations are "acceptable" and what aren't. Many autistic people talk about "private" topics really openly, and allistics see that as oversharing. Other autistic people consider everything private and avoid asking/answering questions, so many allistics see them as weird or like we have something to hide. I for example am in the second category and since I was a child, I had strange boundaries on what's acceptable to ask and what isn't. That's alright, it's simply just another autism thing.

Does anyone else ever feel like their body parts are on wrong? I get this weird sensation sometimes that mine are, even though I can look at it and see it’s fine.

Right now, it’s my hips and pelvis. It just feels wrong.

Is this an autistic sensory thing?

I had apple slices and brie last night for dinner

Hyperfixation Food #48

Apple slices and smoked gouda cheese

There’s one thing I always think of when I hear “how could you let it get so bad?” and similar phrases. It’s in the comments of every video of matted hair or a dirty kitchen.

I think the appropriate response is “what would have to happen to you for you to let it get that bad?” And when you think about that question, and the horrifying answers that come with it, you almost certainly have more sympathy for the person you were being judgemental to.

Yesterday I was supposed to meet with my case manager, since we’ve never met. I had the address and even confirmed in the morning it wasn’t a Telehealth visit, like the additiona automated call I received the day before said it was. I arrived early and waited in the office. And waited. And waited.

Then I received a message from my wife saying that the case manager was at our house. She never said it was in home. I couldn’t handle anything else after that call.

I cried so much. I never ended up meeting her because I was 25 minutes away from home.

We will eventually reschedule.

Why is life so challenging?

As a ND person, I hate having to take communications courses in college. It reaffirms that NT people are confusing AF.

I was working with a young kid yesterday who was screaming and struggling while her dad and I tried to wash her hair but in between screams I asked her what kind of soup she would be if a witch cursed the world into becoming Soup World and her utter confusion broke the spell of her fear. She stopped crying and just looked at me and echoed “Soup World????” and we got her hair clean no problem.

you don't have to be "burnt out" to justify tasks being difficult for you. Being autistic or having ADHD makes TASKS DIFFICULT INHERENTLY. WE ARE DISABLED.

I’m having a very emotional day. My business communications class is triggering a lot of old memories from when I was working at two different companies. I know I did what I could with the knowledge and tools I had at that point in my life, but the memories still hurt.

Not knowing I was autistic and how that impacted everything in my life was a huge factor. Not being properly medicated for ADHD and feeling like I was the only person who didn’t have my shit together practically killed me. I still have PTSD from comments I saw and heard others say about me. About being gaslit by my manager. About being so overwhelmed that I am still dealing with burnout.

It doesn’t help that I’m not in therapy right now. My case worker is pushing to try to find me a therapist but the system is so overloaded and there just aren’t enough people to go along without burning out the therapists.

On top of all that, my assignment this week in my business communications class is to talk about my chosen field and how communication has changed. Except I don’t have a chosen field. I’m struggling to figure out what it is and if I can actually work. I’m in crisis every day about it. Being disabled but “not disabled enough” is taking its toll right now. I’m not okay. I’m hopeful things will get better but that’s where I am.

Being overstimulated is so weird with both ADHD and Autism.

Do even the slightest sounds make me wanna scream and cry? Yes.

Does listening to some intense dubstep on max volume in my earbuds immediately ground me and help? Also yes.

I stress about having to use my card properly and not take too long and what if it doesn’t read right and what if there aren’t seats and what if I have to sit next to someone who wants to talk and where do I look and ALL THE NOISES.

And that’s just for buses and the light rail. I’ve been rehearsing air travel for much longer.

To other autistic people, how do you feel about travelling on public transport?

The beginner autistic guide to common terms in our community (with extra context!).

*Disclaimer, I’m not a professional. This is just knowledge from my experience as an autistic person. Please feel free to correct anything :)

These definitions will include some of my own opinions and thoughts, especially on the more controversial terms. This is simply to help better prepare new autistic community members for conversations they become engaged in. Having all the perspective and context you can have can be very helpful when moving into new social spaces.

Autism (Or Autistic Spectrum Disorder, ASD): A neurodevelopmental disorder that is present from very early childhood. It’s mostly recognised through difficulties with social interaction and restricted and/or repetitive behaviours. The way it is referred to as “Autism Spectrum Disorder” is specifically referring to the fact that autism presents in countless ways. There are common traits and patterns, but the severity and complexity of those traits and symptoms is infinite.

NOTE: This does not mean that ‘everyone is a little bit autistic’. You are either autistic or you are not. It just means that if you have autism, it may present very differently to other autistic people you know.

Asperger’s Syndrome: Asperger’s syndrome is usually considered an older term for a ‘subtype’ of autism. The term is considered outdated by the DSM-5 and no longer used in that document. However it is still used in a lot of other countries. Now it is becoming more socially known that ‘Asperger’s syndrome’ is just a specific presentation of autism. Many autistics don’t like the use of the word ‘Asperger’s’ because of a couple reasons:

The term has a long history with NAZI’s and eugenics.

The term seems to basically mean ‘high functioning’ autistic, which simplifies the condition.

Asperger’s Syndrome is defined in a very similar way to autism, however people with “Asperger’s’ may be described as ‘gifted’ or ‘intellectual’.

It’s important to note that many people still identify themselves with the term ‘Asperger’s’. While it is good to be educated and up to date with terminology, some people have identified with this term their whole life and it’s not wrong to use the term for one-self. But either way, I do encourage you to do more research if you are comfortable.

Neurotype: Can be basically defined as the type of brain function one has. Some people consider autism a neurotype, and then neurotypical as another neurotype. However, many people claim that autism is ‘just another neurotype’. This is a harmful way of thinking about autism because autism is a disability. Labelling it as a ‘neurotype’ belittles all the struggles autistic people have that make them disabled. Autism is a spectrum and so some autistic people may not really consider themselves disabled, but many do.

Neurotypical (NT): A non-autistic person with no other mental conditions.

Allistic: A non-autistic person who can still have other mental conditions, such as depression or ADHD.

Neurodivergent (ND): Traditionally ‘Neurodivergent’ has been used to mean either autistic or ADHD. However in some contexts it is used to mean someone with any mental condition, including personality disorders or mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety.

Neurodiversity: a term used to describe the fact that there are many neurotypes in the world. It is used to imply that differences in brain development and function should be accepted as relatively normal. I think this is a good sentiment, but that some neurotypes should still be considered disabilities as well as a neurotype, so as not to diminish the struggles specific neurotypes go through.

High functioning/Low functioning: The labels of functioning are terms used to describe how independent an autistic (or other kind of disabled) person is able to be. Many autistics do NOT like the use of these terms for a couple reasons:

It tends to focus on the way an autistics disability affects the allistic people around them.

It simplifies the experience of the individual with autism to how independent they are, and is also not very descriptive for anyone trying to help the said autistic person.

High needs/Low needs: These are labels used to describe how much assistance an autistic (or other kind of disabled) person may need. It is slightly preferred by autistic people as the language is more centred to what the autistic person needs, rather than how independent they can be.

NOTE, many autistic people would argue that these terms are basically the same as high functioning and low functioning. I personally consider it to be best to just state someones highest needs or difficulties. For example “Olivia is nonverbal and highly sensitive to light and noise.”.

Masking: Masking is the act of hiding ones autistic traits to appear to be neurotypical. Masking is often a survival strategy developed by autistics to evade bullying or isolation. Masking can include suppressing the urge to stim, forcing oneself to make eye contact, learning how to ‘properly’ execute facial expressions, studying body language, etc. Masking can be an extremely vital skill for autistic people, but when an autistic person has to mask for long periods of time it can lead to negative consequences such as burn out or meltdowns. Masking can also be used in the context of other disabilities, such as ADHD.

Scripting: Scripting is a form of masking, when an autistic person pre-plans or practices responses or entire conversations. You may have a script you unconsciously follow for questions like “how are you?” Or “how is work?”, etc. It may be inspired from TV shows, movies or observing other people interact.

Burn out: Burn out is when an autistic person reaches their limit and has decreased energy for an extended period of time. Burn out may last anywhere between a couple days or a few years. Burn out is often caused by excessive masking, but can also be caused by repeated rejection, bullying or other mental conditions. Burn out is not the same as depression, but it can co-exist with depression.

Meltdown: A meltdown is when an autistic person experiences what might look like a ‘tantrum’. The person may be very angry, yelling, punching or hitting things (or themselves). They may be aggressively stimming or humming to themselves. A meltdown, internally, feels as if you are completely filled with negative energy, as if you might burst. It can feel like extreme irritation, or anger, or shame. Meltdowns can be caused by any number of stressful situations. For an autistic person this can be having a lot of social events, their routine being disrupted, having to eat foods they don’t like, being overstimulated, or even just negative social interactions.

Shutdown: A shutdown is very similar to a meltdown, in how it can be caused. For me personally, I tend to have a shutdown if I am not in a safe place to have a meltdown. From the outside it looks very similar to dissociation, and it can co-exist with dissociation. It typically feels like you are shutting down, turning off. You emotions were about to burst and then you just went numb. You may be unable to move, or go non-verbal. You may be crying quietly or you may simply just very suddenly feel the need to go home.

NOTE: Meltdowns and shutdowns can appear to feel like a panic attack, but they are different. Panic attacks come from intense feelings of dread or doom. Meltdowns and shutdowns come from repeated, or intense, stressful situations for an autistic.

Hypersensitive: Hypersensitivity is when the brain processes sensory input (such as touch, taste and smell) as much more intense than a neurotypical person would. This can mean that a slight cold breeze may feel painfully cold. Or looking outside a window can hurt ones eyes because it feels too bright. Or having to wear specific textures to stay calm.

Hyposensitive: Hyposensitivity is the opposite of hypersensitivity. It is when your brain inteprets sensory input as much less intense than a neurotypical would. Ways this can present in an autistic person include not realising when they hurt themselves, having a high pain tolerance, being unaware of temperature changes, etc. You may also not recognise your bodies hunger cues, dehydration or need for sleep.

NOTE: An autistic person can experience both hypersensitivity and hyposensitivity. It can also fluctuate day-to-day.

Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD): SPD is basically the term for experiencing lots of variation in your sensory input. It is similar to Auditory processing disorder. Which is where your hearing is technically fine (you aren’t any form of deaf), but you have trouble distinguishing what specific sounds are, or listening to one, important sound, in an area with lots of different noises (for example, being unable to understand what someone is saying next to you, because the TV is on.)

Overstimulation: This is when an autistic person has been experiencing too many different sensations at once, or for an extended period of time. This may be caused by too many noises happening at once. Or even just one annoying sound repeating for a long time. It can also be triggered by touch, taste, sight and smell.

Executive function/dysfunction: Executive function is the term used to describe how the brain initiates tasks. For neurodivergent folk, our executive function is often dysfunctional. This means we can often find it difficult to start new tasks. A way you may experience it is when you are sitting down, you may be screaming internally that you need to go and get some food, but your body seems unwilling to co-operate. Having executive dysfunction does not mean you are lazy, or do not want to do the task, it means you may be unable  to do the task.

Autistic intertia: Autistic inertia is related to executive dysfunction, because it is a term that helps describe how autistic people struggle to switch or initiate tasks. “ An autistic at rest remains at rest, and an autistic in motion remains in motion”.

Special interest/Hyperfixation: A special interest is a extremely long term interest/obsession with a particular topic. An example might be being really into pokemon. Learning all the different types of pokemon, playing all the games and collecting heaps of merch. A hyperfixation is a more short-lived interest that can be destructive in it’s severity (for example, it might get so extreme that it’s the only thing you can think about, to the point where you neglect your needs). Special interests are less likely to be destructive. But hyperfixations can be healthy and normal too.

Stimming: Stimming or self stimulation is the act of doing repetitive movements to help self regulate. Stimming can look like spinning, chewing, flapping hands, dancing, foot tapping, pen clicking, touch soft fabrics, using weighted blankets, lighting candles, eating crunchy snacks, etc. All of these forms of movement or repetitive sensory input can help us regulate our emotions better, prevent a meltdown or shutdown, or focus on a task easier.

NOTE: Echolalia is another term you may hear. It is a form of stimming in which an autistic person repeats sounds/phrases over and over.

ADHD: Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder is a neurodevelopmental disorder like autism, but it affects the brain in different ways. It often presents as having difficulties with paying attention, regulating emotions and hyperactivity (or, alternatively, it can present as being inattentive).

Savant or Savant syndrome: A condition when someone with some type of significant mental disability is an expert/’savant’ in a particular field, to the point of surpassing neurotypical experts. An example might be having photographic memory, or being able to learn languages extremely easily, or being an extraordinary mathematician. Autistic people often don’t like to hear the term ‘savant’ as we are often only valued by ‘society’ if we are savants. And if we are not, then we are often treated as lesser. This is kind of a form of eugenics.

Eugenics: Eugenics is a philosophy or belief that we can selectively breed humans to ‘improve’ humanity. Or create the ‘perfect race’. This was an idealogy practiced by Adolf Hitler during WWII, which lead to the holocaust. Eugenics is often a subtly underlying philosophy behind many statements that, on face value, seem relatively harmless. For example - “autism is the next step in evolution” is currently a popular statement. However, this implies that every other neurotype is not an improvement, which therefore implies that being autistic is superior. This would be considered a form of eugenics. Eugenics is considered a horrible philosophy because it encourages people to look down on others and dehumanise anyone not like themselves.

Co-morbidity: A co-morbidity is the term used for a condition that is regularly seen in conjunction with another condition. For example, autism and ADHD are often seen together. However, it can also be used to simply describe someone who has more than one condition (physical or mental).

AuDHDer: Someone with autism and ADHD. Just a shortened way to refer to people with both disabilities.

Selective mutism/Situational mutism: When an autistic person (or other neurotype) experiences periods of being unable to speak or communicate. This can often occur in stressful situations, like before tests or during doctors appointments. It is officially referred to as ‘selective mutism’ but many are trying to change it to ‘situational mutism’ as the individual does not willingly choose when they go non-verbal.

Alexithymia: Alexithymia is typically described as the inability to define and/or describe ones emotions. So you may often feel a type of discomfort, but not be able to label what it is. Not being able to distinguish between anger and irritability. Or not knowing if you feel sad or confused. It can make seeking professional help for many conditions really difficult, as you are unable to put your experience into words. It can also be similar to hyposensitivity in the way that it makes it difficult to understand what you body is feeling.

Dyspraxia: Dyspraxia is a disorder that affects co-ordination, movement and balance. It can make things such as sports, driving, cooking and writing difficult. It is fairly common in autistic people.

Prosopagnosia: The inability to recognise/remember faces. It is more common in autistic people.

Synesthesia: Synesthesia is when one form of sensory input is sometimes also experienced as another. For example, someone with this condition may see colours when they hear someones name. They may hear a song and get a taste in their mouth. This is also more common in autistic people.

FINAL NOTE: Autism is a spectrum and you may not experience all of these different terms, or you may not experience them in the way I described them. That does not mean you aren’t autistic. This is not a diagnostic tool. This is simply a guide to learning the terms you may often hear when discussing autism.

I thought I didn’t have RSD until it was pointed out to me that I take things like a personal attack and that I’m super emotional. So I researched it again through this lens. This happened just a few days ago and now I can’t unsee it.

Unpacking my own neurodiversity is weird, even after all these years.

My bestie just got the autism diagnosis for her 7 year old son. I think I convinced her not to put him through ABA. She’s already getting a referral for OT. What helpful therapies are there that aren’t abusive or traumatic that I can suggest she look into?

I’m “watching” my bestie’s 7 year old son and he’s watching Godzilla videos. He’s telling me all about the different Godzillas and their abilities. It makes my heart so happy. You go, T! Tell me all about your current hyperfocus and obsession. I love this kid.

I feel this

I’m diagnosed as autistic, but I don’t really struggle a lot with social cues. I pick most of them up naturally it just takes a while. I have trouble figuring out when I’m supposed to speak so I usually just don’t. And I can’t usually tell when to stop a conversation. But I’m pretty good at all the other social stuff. Can I still be autistic? Is there a chance I was misdiagnosed?

"I pick up on social cues naturally but it just takes a while."

That's not picking up in social cues naturally. That's reading them and interpreting them after you learnt them via study and masking. Allistics don't need a while. It's instantaneous.

Trouble figuring out your turn to speak and stopping a conversation? Autism.

And pretty good at social stuff or you're no longer a child and have learnt the rules and regulations around social interaction?

This is classic imposter syndrome and I can tell you that if you are diagnosed as autistic, you're autistic. We're all different, yes, so my struggles will be different to yours. But reading social cues like an old 1950s radio manual is not the same as allistic understanding of social cues.

*warm hugs*

I just read that asking someone how they are is rhetorical; my mind is blown. Is it really rhetorical? I’m so confused.

Things to think about and ponder

fully personal opinion

see many autistic people online treat someone calling self “high functioning” as a red flag, and some view it more extremely as irredeemable and make immediate assumption about person.

and i don’t… fully agree?

like of course see where they come from. there definitely are autistic people who identify as “high functioning” (high functioning autism, HFA) or “aspie” to separate self from the other autistics because they look down on other autistics. others may even believe HFA is this new evolutionary goal and people with HFA and only high functioning autism is better than everyone else, allistics included. they are yucky.

i carefully curate n select my internet experience because know if get mad, won’t be able to step away. so i don’t see these people much at all online. also because of dominant views in online autism community, these aspie supremacy HFA people don’t really participate in online actually autistic community.

but the reason i say i dont fully agree is because….

for so long me as a higher support needs level 2/3 austistuc and my friends who are similar or have more support needs as me & may be labeled “low functioning”, we been spoken over in online autistic community. dominant view of autism in online actually autistic community say every autistic all the same just mask differently or stuff like that. can look at my other posts for more context.

so, i really do appreciate when… how to say… an autistic respond to my posts say “i’m high functioning and i agree/thank you for bringing light to issue/etc etc.”

like. call themself as “high functioning” to, yes, separate themselves from me, not in the “im better than you i worth more than you”, but in the way of “i acknowledge me being/being seen as high functioning means i have different experiences than you, and on higher support needs/level2 3/low functioning issues i don’t have the lived experience and i need to listen.”

like i fully appreciate the latter, you know?

it’s also okay to say like. “while i don’t identify as high functioning, i do acknowledge i am often seen as high functioning, and that means i get treated better than those called low functioning.”

anticipate some people will say “well there still are better terms out there, like low support needs.” and the thing is, high functioning, levels, and support needs may all be trying to describe similar things, but they don’t neatly translate to each other. they don’t exactly mean same thing. “high functioning” doesn’t necessarily always mean low support needs.

and it not my place to tell other people how to self identify!

also because, i do like functioning labels when voluntarily used as self descriptor.

so, TLDR, i do oppose professionals & other people forcibly labeling autistics with functioning labels, i do hate those aspie supremacist high functioning autistics. but i think there is more nuance (always more nuance) to the “call self high functioning = bad” conversation. sometimes really do appreciate when someone self describe use “high functioning” to note difference in autistic experiences.

idk just personal thoughts. idk make sense.

Here’s where I am today

Wish to know where your needs fall on the spectrum?

Take the test here.

This test is NOT for diagnosis.

Where your needs fall can change throughout your life and even day to day.

I know I wasn’t diagnosed as a kid because it wasn’t a thing they looked for in girls and I was social and good at school and acted “normal”, but omg how was I not diagnosed as a kid?!

autism is just being a picky eater, wearing the same hoodie for 9 days straight, and the sun stressing you out

Guys, I just learnt that Spongebob being autistic is CANON!!

NO FUCKING WAY???