I Don’t Want A Degree Anymore I Want A Nap

being a russian and trying to be a part of the dark academia community is HARD

the first snow comes in the middle of october and it’s a harsh winter from november to the end of march, so you have to wear ugly jackets and a million layers of clothes if you want to make it to spring. wanna be aesthetic and mysterious, wearing turtlenecks, a coat and a nice pair of shoes? well, dying of pneumonia is also very romantic. [keep yourself warm, please]

okay so.... hear me out... there is a youtube video with dark s3 bloopers and i’ve noticed something... a scene where doris comes down the stairs and there is a silhouette that kinda looks like agnes?? were they supposed to meet after all? idk i’m probably just overthinking but...

kara x north

“ - forever?

- forever.”

“I know, I know, but hear me out. You read The Idiot, right? Right. Well, ‘Idiot’ was a very disturbing book to me. In fact it was so disturbing I have never really read very many fictions after, apart from Dragon Tattoo kind of thing. Because” - I was trying to interject - “well, maybe you can tell me about that later, what you thought, but let me tell you why I found it disturbing. Because all Myshkin ever did was good…unselfish…he treated all persons with understanding and compassion and what resulted from this goodness? Murder! Disaster! I used to worry about this a lot. Lie awake at night and worry! Because - why? How could this be? I read that book like three times, thinking I wasn’t understanding right. Myshkin was kind, loved by everyone, he was tender, always forgave, he never did a wrong thing - but he trusted all the wrong people, made all bad decisions, hurt everyone around him. Very dark message to this book. ‘Why be good’. But - this is what took hold on me last night, riding here in the car. What is - is more complicated than that? What if maybe opposite is true as well? Because, if bad can sometimes come from good actions - ? where does it ever say, anywhere, that only bad can come from bad actions? Maybe sometimes - the wrong way is the right way? You can take the wrong path and it still comes out where you want to be? Or, spin it another way, sometimes you can do everything wrong and it still turns out to be right?”

The Goldfinch, Donna Tartt

the greek squad be like

— 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙜𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙨 𝙛𝙖𝙢𝙞𝙡𝙮 𝙖𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙨.

vanya’s storyline only proves the dangers of heterosexuality. protect yourself. be a lesbian.

please just let me go

wholesome student life things that we should collectively start romancizing

waking up and being genuinely thrilled to go to class because today is THAT CLASS you love so much you’d like it to never end

coffee breaks with friends, chatting and joking about this particularly hard essay and the prof’s mannerism

coffee breaks on your own, as you absent-mindedly watch the people around you, while thinking about what you’re working on

finding this book you’ve been dying to read for so long, and borrowing it from the library

the feeling of excitement that goes through you whenever you remember The Book is in your backpack

understanding everything during demanding classes and being genuinely interested in the subject

buying a New Special Pen and taking colorful notes that look super pretty

not being able to shut up about your school projects (no your friends dont really care about the intricate details of what you’re working on, they don’t even have the same major as you, but they’re happy to hear you rant with such a burning passion)

actually doing the extra reading and having your curiosity so piqued by what you’re reading that you go on and on and suddenly its 1am and what happened

printing the project you’ve spent so much time and energy on and feeling the paper’s warmth

actually submitting that project without feeling awful about it because you know you did your best and aren’t responsible for what happens next

when you finally finish this Super Hard And Important Essay at like 3am, open the window and feel the cold night air on your burning cheeks and everything is dark and quiet and you can see the moon and you’re at peace with everything for a few minutes

when this professor you admire says you did a great job and/or that you’re talented!!!!

realizing two concepts that seemed so far away from each other and that you discovered in wildly different contexts are actually interlinked, then Realizing™ things and linking concepts/works/articles to each other at the speed of light & being super excited about it

being so deeply immersed in your work that you didn’t realize two hours have passed

finding the Perfect Spot at the library

that Pure Joy moment when you FINALLY understand that super obscure sentence/text

when you feel anxious because you’re not done with your homework & the deadline is super tight & your friend tells you they aren’t done yet either

same but with an even more intense relief feeling when you realize you both haven’t even started yet

when the professor starts a new reasoning and you can predict what the next idea/the final conclusion will be

when the professor mention your favorite novel/author/fictional character in class and you feel like your internal screech of joy could shatter glass

the Academic Salt™ that has you like 👀👀

when the professor tears apart an author or scholar you hate and you’re like YES I WANT BLOOD GIVE ME BLOOD

when you learn that Cool New Fact that makes you reconsider your whole life

leaving the library after a long productive day and feeling like nothing is real but experiencing everything more intensely

leaving the library at night after a long study session and everybody has left already and its just you and the long neon-lit corridors then stepping outside and smelling the crisp night wind

feel free to add your own!!!