Concerning Horoscopes And Tarot Cards

oh oh, oh, I can play this song, badly.  This is a song you dont fully appreciate til you’ve been there.

I legit am envious of people who drugs and the procurement therein are their biggest problems in life.  You know they did a long term study on junkies(heroin), and found the ones who didnt die of heroin overdose, after 20, 25 years got super bored with junk and just stopped.  THAT’S the real struggle, the drug, the withdrawal, thats nothing compared to the life after, the boredom, the sleepless nights, the regret of past mistakes, the contemplation of a futureless future, the realization that you’re not special, you’re not a victim of circumstance or of substance, you’re just lazy and selfish.

Drugs are the least of your worries, life is the true horror, and life kills you like no other thing, the very oxygen you breathe destroys your cells, the gravity that holds you to earth damages your organs, the food and water you take in slowly erodes you, the shit that backs up in you festers and eats you, the germs all around you tax your immune system so long eventually it gives up.  Do drugs, dont do drugs, it really doesn’t matter, it’s all contingent on which way you want to die, and how slow you want to do it, and thats a personal choice that has nothing to do with popular opinion

The moon had risen behind him, the color of a shark's underbelly. It lit the ruined walls, and the skin of his arms and hands, with its sickly light, making him long for a mirror in which to study his face. Surely he'd be able to see the bones beneath the meat; the skull gleaming the way his teeth gleamed when he smiled. After all, wasn't that what a smile said? Hello, world, this is the way I'll look when the wet parts are rotted.

Clive Barker, The Great and Secret Show

and since i just seem to be arbitrarily posting music ya dont know ( because I’m lazy ) here’s a song you know in a language youve never heard, youd be shocked maybe to find this language is actually the granddaddy of English, but we dont want the tumblr community thinking too abstractly now do we.

Clay, did you ever love me?" I'm studying a billboard and say that I didn't hear what she said. "I asked if you ever loved me?" On the terrace the sun bursts into my eyes and for one blinding moment I see myself clearly. I remember the first time we made love, in the house in Palm Springs, her body tan and wet, lying against cool, white sheets. "Don't do this, Blair," I tell her. "Just tell me." I don't say anything. "Is it such a hard question to answer?" I look at her straight on. "Yes or no?" "Why?" "Damnit, Clay," she sighs. "Yeah, sure, I guess." "Don't lie to me." "What in the fuck do you want to hear?" "Just tell me," she says, her voice rising. "No," I almost shout. "I never did." I almost start to laugh. She draws in a breath and says, "Thank you. That's all I wanted to know." She sips her wine. "Did you ever love me?" I ask her back, though by now I can't even care. She pauses. "I thought about it and yeah, I did once. I mean I really did. Everything was all right for a while. You were kind." She looks down and then goes on. "But it was like you weren't there. Oh shit, this isn't going to make any sense." She stops. I look at her, waiting for her to go on, looking up at the billboard. Disappear Here. "I don't know if any other person I've been with has been really there, either ... but at least they tried." I finger the menu; put the cigarette out. "You never did. Other people made an effort and you just ... It was just beyond you." She takes another sip of her wine. "You were never there. I felt sorry for you for a little while, but then I found it hard to. You're a beautiful boy, Clay, but that's about it." I watch the cars pass by on Sunset. "It's hard to feel sorry for someone who doesn't care." "Yeah?" I ask. "What do you care about? What makes you happy?" "Nothing. Nothing makes me happy. I like nothing," I tell her. "Did you ever care about me, Clay?" I don't say anything, look back at the menu. "Did you ever care about me?" she asks again. "I don't want to care. If I care about things, it'll just be worse, it'll just be another thing to worry about. It's less painful if I don't care." "I cared about you for a little while." I don't say anything. She takes off her sunglasses and finally says, "I'll see you later, Clay." She gets up. "Where are you going?" I suddenly don't want to leave Blair here. I almost want to take her back with me. "Have to meet someone for lunch." "But what about us?" "What about us?" She stands there for a moment, waiting. I keep staring at the billboard until it begins to blur and when my vision becomes clearer I watch as Blair's car glides out of the parking lot and becomes lost in the haze of traffic on Sunset. The waiter comes over and asks, "Is everything okay, sir?" I look up and put my sunglasses on and try to smile. "Yeah.

Bret Easton Ellis, Less Than Zero

We make an idol of our fear and that idol we call God.

Ingmar Bergman

Who says Germans arent poetic