Btw If You Wanna See A Blind Character, The Chief Engineer On Star Trek: The Next Generation Is Blind.

someone: yeah I support mentally ill people. I want to get rid of the stigma

me: yeah so I'm recovering from a self harm addiction- *an anvil is dropped on my head*

Just a reminder that ableism against personality disorders, especially cluster b personality disorder, is alive and well.

Not having empathy doesn’t make someone evil. It doesn’t make them an abuser. In fact, people without empathy are better in certain vital positions. We’re better at being first responders, 911 operators, and other tasks that would overwhelm empaths. We work better in critical situations than empaths do.

Thinking that any disorder makes someone evil is ableist. And when you take into account the sexist bias in diagnosing women with BPD and the racist and classist bias in diagnosing POC and prison inmates with ASPD and NPD? It’s not only ableist, it’s all kinds of -ists. Plus, it’s really rich for someone who claims that empathy is what makes someone good to have so little empathy for people with disorders that are literally trauma-based.

So yeah if you see someone being a dick to people with PDs? Say something. Because they’re definitely not going to listen to us.

When I talk about visible autism on my blog, I’m usually not talking about those who are clocked as quirky and weird. Although that’s completely valid, I’m not talking about them. I’m talking about those of us who are VISIBLY autistic. Those of us who are clocked as those autistics. Who are clocked immediately as having something wrong with them. Those of us who are named as slurs. Who are yelled at. Who are attacked. Who are glared at, pointed at, stared at, pitied. Those of us who are automatically assumed to be with caregivers. Those of us you see talked about in medical journals and on the news as “inspiration” when we graduate or get invited to prom.

This is us. This is who we’re marked as. This is who we are seen as. We are seen as less than, as animals, as objects, as “inspirations”. When we accomplish something it’s usually not seen as our accomplishments but as the accomplishments of our caregivers and support staff.

I get so mad when someone comes onto my blog, MY blog. Me. A visibly autistic, nonverbal person, and doesn’t even look at my tags or pinned post and says “Omg me too, I’m seen as quirky and awkward, I’m visibly autistic 🥰” and like…go you but I’m not talking about you. I’m not talking about “low masking”. Im talking about LOW masking. No masking or very very low masking. Those of us who are immediately seen as autistic.

And it’s frustrating. It’s frustrating when people come into my blog and say this because, you DON’T get it. You just don’t. You don’t get what my life is like, what my experiences are. What it’s like to be LOW masking or no masking. You don’t get that. And yet you try and squeeze yourself in. And that hurts. It hurts to have people who won’t ever understand this squeeze themselves in. Stop doing this.

An unpopular opinion that actually makes sense when I explain why I have it. (Well makes sense if you're not abelist)

I'm not too fond of the "I don't want to be led by the people that ate off of led paint and played in asbestos." Criticism against baby boomers.

Obvious abelism aside (the criticism is implying that baby boomers are less fit to lead because asbestos and lead severely negatively impacts cognitive functioning.)

But both of these mass disabling events are centered around a lack of knowledge that asbestos and lead has such a severe impact on cognitive functioning.

And I don't like that because many people today are also victims of a mass disabling event caused by a lack of information.

Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder.

Up until 2013. The only fetal alcohol diagnosis that existed was Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. And it's caused by severe alcoholism in the pregnant person, and the baby tends to have withdrawals after they're born.

Back then. It was believed if you drank while pregnant, you could still get lucky, and your child can be born "completely fine".

But very recently (I think it was in the early 2000s?) People started saying "No. They're not 'completely fine'. They don't have the classic signs of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, but they're still impacted by the alcohol on the developing fetus." And it was in 2013 they realized that yes. Even "just one or two glasses" causes Fetal alcohol spectrum disorder.

It's estimated 1 in 10 pregnant women between the ages of 15-41 have had alcohol in the past month and 1 in 5 first graders have fetal alcohol spectrum disorder.

Fetal alcohol syndrome is pretty well known. They have a distinct face shape and learning disability.

But fetal alcohol spectrum disorder can (but doesn't always) have specific facial features. Other symptoms include

Trouble with emotional regulation

Issues learning

Low body weight

Loss of coordination

Issues with empathy

Shorter height

Hyperactivity

Holding attention difficulties

And you're thinking "wow. That sounds a lot like my autism/ADHD diagnosis". Yeah. Since it's not well known in its mild forms. It's often misdiagnosed as autism/ADHD and often times the best way to know is by straight up asking your parents if there's any chance your mom drank while pregnant.

I asked my mom, and she was one of those strict "I didn't even dye my hair while pregnant because I thought the chemicals would seep through my skin and affect the baby."

But like...

Let's not make fun of baby boomers for being disabled due to a lack of knowledge? When a lot of us Millennials and GenZ are probably affected by a similar lack of information.

-fae

A list of pyromania symptoms one might experience.

Not a guide to diagnosis.

- the urge to ignite flames.

You most likely will feel the urge to start fires in some way, be it activating a lighter repeatedly or creating bigger flames by burning things. The urge can feel like an itch in the brain, a stretch in your fingers or just the sudden need to grab a lighter or fire source. It can be very intense at times, making it hard to resist the impulsion to do so.

- the urge to touch flames

Some experience the impulse to attempt touching fire. From putting your fingertips to a candle or lighter flame to putting your hand on a campfire or bonfire. This of course is a pretty dangerous and possibly self harming urge to have but the majority of the time the intent isn't to harm but simply to feel the warmth and sting of holding fire.

- satisfaction in fire

Many feel relief, relaxed or even euphoric once they've started fire. For many, fire is a sort of stimuli almost nothing else can give them. Watching a small flame dance or watching fire eat away ant kindling can be enough to satisfy the crave in their brain for that stimuli, however for some that still won't be enough, thus why the most commonly known pyromaniacs tend to be people who create much bigger fires than anything.

- stress or depression

More often than not you may feel mood swings due to the lack of stimuli your brain craves from fire. Going without it for long can cause some sort of distress that manifests differently for everyone and can become more intense the longer you are letting your brain crave to give in to the impulses. For some this comes as a depressive episode, high stress levels, anxiety episodes, paranoia and so on, often influenced by any possible conditions one might have in addition to pyromania or simply influenced by their environment. This can cause someone to lash out, isolate and shut down or even lead to them creating a bigger fire to relieve all that distress.

- lacking control

When struggling with an impulse based disorder like pyromania, you may experience a lack of control over your impulse, starting fire and lighting things without thought and being quick to give in to urges. For some this lack of control can be small, they are able to resist the impulses better than others, but for some this lack of control is large and they struggle intensely with the urge to start flames.

- feeling drawn

Many feel obsessed over or lured to fire and flames, an almost intense affinity of some kind for all things related to fire.

- purposeful sparks

Most fires pyromaniacs set are on purpose and if you have pyromania you likely experienced setting more than one or two fires on purpose.

- excitement

Plenty feel a rush of some kind just before starting a fire, almost a thrill in the anticipation or excitement at the idea of the act. Some feel this as glee towards the relief fire gives them. Very rarely is this ever sexual, if it were it would be pyrophilia, a different condition.

- hoarding

Some collect fire related materials like matches and lighters or candles due to their fascination for fire and always feeling the impulse to start one. Some may carry a lighter at all times just to watch the flame in small moments when the urge starts bothering them during the day. It's not uncommon to find a lot of candles or different lighters in there home in varieties, often a range of used, empty or new lighters. Some even keep all their lighters instead of throwing them away after they've emptied.

Unfortunately there is still a lot of research yet to be done about pyromania, it's causes and it's symptoms as it is not a very common disorder to have. Some even call it rare.

This does not mean that very little is currently known, plenty is known about the disorder so far and I intend on sharing as much as I can and making the knowledge as publicly available for free as possible, but there is quite a bit still yet to know.

I'm sure there are symptoms I missed for example.

While I have the disorder myself I am not a professional, nor in the medical field, and so there is much I myself may miss.

While I'm not an expert, I am open to answering questions and discussing as much as possible.

@clusterrune @delightfulweepingwillows @hewasanamericangirl

"i'm using delusional in the right context, it's not like it's that serious"

DELUSIONAL DISORDER + SCHIZO SPECTRUM DISORDERS + TBI + MANY OTHERS

"calling someone a narcissist isn't ableist it's not a disability"

NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER

"sociopath/psychopath are just adjectives it's not like I'm hurting anyone"

ANTISOCIAL PERSONALITY DISORDER

"saying i'm ocd doesn't affect you it's just the way i act"

MOTHERFUCKING OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE PERSONALITY DISORDER

"i'm schizoposting lol it's just a joke"

SCHIZOPHRENIA

SCHIZOID PERSONALITY DISORDER

SCHIZOAFFECTIVE DISORDER

SCHIZOTYPAL PERSONALITY DISORDER

it's never just a joke, it's never an adjective. use a fucking thesaurus

Jus wanted to take a moment and say..

DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, TAG MY POSTS WITH ANYTHING RELATED TO LIFTBLR!!!

That shit is fucking stupid...I swear..how're you gonna go into a store (or several) shoplift, and then not only come home and brag about it online but do so by sharing photos of the stolen items, a list of the locations you hit, AND the monetary value of the items in question?!?!

This blog is NOT about shoplifting or theft for fun or to be quirky or what the fuck ever...it's about legit KLEPTOMANIA!!!

in recognition of World Down Syndrome Day on March 21

I feel like if your MRI doesn't show anything you should get a refund

I love to use my disability “as an excuse.” Fuck yeah my disability is an excuse. It’s the most valid excuse I have. I’m not helping you lift that box/etc because my disability would make it fucking painful. Not wanting to be in pain is a good enough reason. I’m not going to put myself in pain to comfort your sensibilities.

Yes I’m using my disability as an excuse because I refuse to hurt myself for you. If you’re mad about it you can cry! ❤️