Henley Monday - Early Edition

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WNIPqafd4As&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYp-EOiG9VM&feature=related

It's the final Valentine's Day post and I thought I'd make it a bit of a mega mix if you will. In my lengthy research (read: one afternoon) I discovered that Celine Dion's Las Vegas show is the most nonsensical, melodramatic, coco for kookoopops, bald albino clown-starring, sparkly, shiny, billowing piece of performance that ever was or will be. In short: amazing.

So, to close your day, here are some of her finest songs performed in the absolute strangest manner possible: Celine's way. Bless her. May she reign forever. Amen.

PS - I know that last one is ten minutes, but I promise that the jaw-dropping over exuberance is totally worth it. As a friend recently pointed out about her performers, they are all totally drinking the Dion Kool-aid.

Unlikely Loves - Ear Worm Edition

I sang this song to a friend recently, and she asked if I just made it up on the spot. I immediately and vehemently informed her that it was the great George Michael singing a song about which Freud would have had volumes to say.

Please enjoy this twisted, manic, whispered ballad video that is so completely of its time with super models and wisps of fabric across the frame from one of our favorite 80s pop overlords.

Be warned: This video is almost 6 minutes long and will suck you in completely.

Henley Monday - "Hold Onto Your Butts" Edition

Guys. GUYS. Guys. The time is finally upon us. The time now that a whole new journey begins towards true love that can last anywhere from 6 whole months to a lifetime (cheers Ashley & JP). Yup. You guessed it. Hold onto your butts because THE BACHELOR BEGINS TONIGHT ON ABC AT 8/7CT!!!

And would you look at the fine wardrobe choice made for our Bachelor Sean Lowe in these promotional shots? That black henley looks good Sean. Let us hope that your good fashion choices lead you to good choices on the show that won't leave us screaming at our TVs.

The start of the Bachelor also marks the return of my Bachelor recaps which go up on Wednesday. xoxo

Henley Monday -

Well, it's that time of week again kids. Time again that we must pull ourselves up by the bootstraps and soldier through another five days of work. Time again, that we must bolster our strength and will to go on with the image of a beautiful man wearing a henley dancing through our heads.

So give it up for the Chan-Chan Man! His recently appointed title of People's Sexiest Man Alive was just the cherry on top of a banner year for Channing Tatum. He has evolved from a big, dumb, beautiful baboon to a big, charming, beautiful baboon before our very eyes. We applaud both your career and your fashion choices, Mr. Tatum. Well done!

Distraction 2012 -

The polls on the East Coast are starting to close , and at the brink of actual results rolling in, I am impatient as ever. Good thing I discovered THIS little gem only minutes ago.

It's like the Backstreet Boys KNEW that I would need some happy frivolity today. This song is a real-life dream come true for me because as a wee lass (and certainly NOT within the last five years that would be insane ha HA ha) always wanted my beloved Boys from the Backstreets to release a Christmas album just like the other boy bands had done. But now, after more than a decade of waiting, the time as finally come.

The boys are men and they are all back together singing "la ta da da da's" in five part harmony with a heavy synth background. It is a true Election Day miracle.

Henley Monday -

Happy first day back at work after a long weekend! It was a beautiful weekend up here in Chicago, and I hope everyone out there enjoyed the last official bits of summer fully. I know I did.

But maybe you enjoyed a little too fully and now the hours until you can go home and put on sweats and watch So You Think You Can Dance are dragging by? Enter Hugh Jackman looking fooooiiiiiine in this here crisp, white henley. Jackman doesn't get better than this.He is a tender, hyper-masculine PRINCE among mortals.

Keep it up with the TWO-SIDES Hugh; we love you for it.

Henley Monday - 

Hi folks! Here at Henley Monday I thought I'd start to throw some new players into the game in order to give you even greater perspective as to how universally attractive the henley is.

As such, here is Marat Safin, currently a Russian politician, but more appropriately a former pro-tennis player. Can you imagine a human person being more adorable and sexy at the same time than Marat is being here? His little sweater henley and his whole-face smile and what I imagine are his sinewy forearms.

Good stuff. Spasibo for this Marat, spasib bolshoe.

I want to hug Lindy West. I want to take Lindy West out to the poshest brunch spot in town. I want to buy Lindy West the baby animal of her choosing. I want to follow Lindy West around with a boom box playing her favorite pump up song and fire a confetti cannon any time she enters a room.

The woman deserves lauding. The message of this article is so important, and should be required reading for all woman because it bears so much truth. I will be the first to stand up and say that I am super-duper guilty of making statements like these. Not only to myself, but out loud and often. Watching other people be in love while you aren't, makes it really easy to try and rationalize and explain things away. But Lindy is pointing out that that is STUPID. It is DUMB, DUMMY!

But she also points out that those times when all that nonsense falls away, and life is just life, and you are just you, are awesome. It is the best life can be, and that's what we should be striving for. And if life is the best it can be, then that's just great. And if a relationship should happen to fall into that along the way? Well, then that's just the cherry on top.

So let's all make a pact as women (men, feel free to join in on this. I'd hate to discriminate affirmations) to slap the negative words out of our faces when we hear/speak them and replace them with positive reinforcements and self-actualizing thoughts!

Ready? GO!

My Top Independence Day Movies (Independence Day not included)

Yes, you read that right. I am not including the seminal Will Smith action flick Independence Day in my list of most patriotic movies. Do I always enjoy a viewing of it? Sure, but it doesn't exactly need my endorsement. Let's take a look at some lesser known, equally good films that would perfectly accent your July 4th and why you should choose them over the Patriot or Top Gun or Die Hard (which is a Christmas movie anyway).

1)      Waiting for Guffman (1997) – A mockumentary style film from Christopher Guest and Co. (This is Spinal Tap; Best in Show; A Mighty Wind). It follows a group of small-town-American characters as they prepare for the fictional Blaine, Missouri’s sesquicentennial celebration, the centerpiece of which is a musical covering the town’s history called “Red, White, & Blaine.” It is a hilarious portrait of the American spirit captured in all the bizarre, oddities of the classic Small Town. You’ll find yourself quoting your favorite moments for years to come.

2)      Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999) –Another mockumentary that chronicles small-town American life, this time in Mt. Rose. Minnesota. We follow the various contestants in the Mt. Rose Miss American Teen Princess beauty pageant, and the contestants range from the dopey cheerleader (Amy Adams in her film debut) to the theater geek (Brittany Murphy at her absolute best) to sweet underdog protagonist who practices her tap dancing while working in the morgue (Kirsten Dunst). This movie moves seamlessly from the sublime to the ridiculous, satirizing not only beauty pageants but the politics of the Midwest small-town. Another one with quotable moments every other minute.

3)      Wet Hot American Summer (2001) – Everyone in this movie is someone who has made you laugh till your stomach hurts in something (or everything) else they have done in their careers. Pulling heavily from members of the sketch comedy group The State, it has everyone from David Hyde Pierce to Amy Poehler to Molly Shannon to Paul Rudd to Ken Marino to an infantile Bradley Cooper (AND MANY, MANY MORE!). Directed by David Wain (Role Models; Wanderlust), we see the goings on of the last day at Camp Firewood and mainly the romantic endeavors of the counselors and camp directors. It is weird and offbeat and joyous and dark and a beautiful picture of the kind of summer we all wish we could have again (kind of – give or take a few things like refrigerator humping). Oh yeah, did I mention beloved Detective Stabler, Christopher Meloni, humps a refrigerator?

  4)      Captain America : the First Avenger (2011) – BECAUSE – DUH. It would not be a proper list of All-American movies if I neglected to include All-American superhero Captain America portrayed by All-American beef cake Chris Evans. It takes place during World War II the most nostalgically “good-guys” period of American history, there is a song entitled “The Star Spangled Man with a Plan” and Steve Rodgers is…hoo…he is, uhh…the kind of man with the kind of courage, heart, head of hair, and muscles I think we all wish we could be (myself included). It’s got a good little story and a good bit of action and just a little splash of romance to make a great 4th of July flick. And also, look, yeah, if maybe you double featured this with Marvel's the Avengers I’m not going to do anything to stop you that sounds great.

Henley Monday -

I am so tired today that I wish the world would just swallow me up, pause time, let me nap for roughly seventy years, then spit me back up once time has started again so I can feel rested for the remainder of my life.

However that seems like it would require the defiance of several laws of physics and break the time space continuum or all that hoo-ha. So I'll settle for this picture of Idris Elba. I will let his fearsome masculinity soothe me into a dream-like peace where his perfect, English booming voice tells me tales of old. Ahh yes...I can feel the serenity now...