I AM THE SMARTEST IDIOT I KNOW I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF IRONY!!

You herd of spin the bottle now introducing spin the knife whoever it lands on you have to stab.

Me: i think i will do some tomfucklery

Oldest sibling: i think not

Me:

Them:

Me:

Them: not without me

Rebloging as a gay man

Reblog if you're not homophobic

Every url that reblog’s will be written in a book and shown to my homophobic dad. 

Me: seeing an autistic coded character in media

Also me: don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin themdon't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't kin them don't

Everyone time I have to Google online slang for the meaning I feel like a divorce dad trying act cool around my teen child

Ratatouille and Frankenstein are the same thing

What the hell?

We have come full circle

Zombie apocalypse but the zombies can still function as humans and they work at walmart.

"this is fred he has been working here for 162 years and not once called in sick".

"you can't call in sick when you're dead Kathryn".

A nap is just a snack of sleep