AU where everything is the same except Jon stays the same as he does in S1. No matter what fucked up paranormal event, Jon always explains it away.
Jon: *compels someone to tell their deepest secret* Jon: Obviously I'm just good at getting people to talk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ You're just jealous I'm actually good at my job
Jon:*knowledge appears in Jon's head*
Jon: I'm just naturally smart.
I think somebody else submitted something to the effect of this but you know what? you get bonus points for the skit
I’ve seen a lot of posts on my dash tonight about users who are threatening suicide, with other Tumblr members posting in effort to try to get ahold of them. I think you all should see this:
IF THERE IS EVER A TUMBLR USER WHO HAS POSTED A GOOD-BYE MESSAGE, SUICIDE NOTE, VIDEO, OR ANYTHING OF THE SORT, PLEASE FOLLOW THIS POST.
1. Scroll to the top of your dashboard.
2. See the circular question mark icon at the top? It’s the third one over from your home symbol. Click on that, and a screen similar to the one in the picture will come up.
3. Where you can type in questions, the box with the magnifying glass at the top, type in the word “suicide.”
4. Click on the first link that shows up. It should say, “Pass the URL of the blog on to us.”
5. Type in the user’s URL and tell Tumblr admin that the user is contemplating suicide and has posted a message indicating that they are going through with it or will be attempting. Hit send! Tumblr administration will perform a number of actions to contact the user and take the necessary steps to prevent the suicide.
TUMBLR: THIS COULD SAVE A USER’S LIFE. PLEASE DO NOT IGNORE SUICIDE THREATS.
Reblog this to keep other users aware. Suicide isn’t a joke, and neither is someone’s life. If you didn’t know this, someone else may not, either. Pass it on.
had a dumb idea because i just remembered i used to have one of these old toy tape recorders when i was a kid and id record stories i came up with
i want to bite God's thumb off
"But if we resort to violence we're just as bad as them!"
One man did with 3 bullets what decades of peaceful protesting failed to do. It sent a message. For the first time in decades, the ruling class was afraid.
And now, barely 3 months later, things are back as they were. Not because Luigi's act of violence wasn't effective, but because it was forgotten as a one-off thing and treated as a trend. People Idolized him for his actions but not for the reason they were done.
One man's act of violence was enough to shake the foundations on which this country is built, the rot that had eaten away the hearts and minds of the people had been pushed back, and for the first time, there was clarity in the minds of everyone. There was no Left or Right, there was simply the Working VS the Ruling.
One man was enough to cause the closest this country has ever come to class consciousness, to solving real problems. Imagine ten, a hundred, a thousand more just like him.
Statement eater, paper eater, all the same ;)
NYT has been discouraging reporters from sharing photos of luigi mangione - not due to concerns for his safety but to dissuade sympathy - and refuses to post his alleged manifesto in full. and today, they published an opinion by bret stephens about how brian thompson is the "real working class hero" of this story.
reddit deleted luigi's account, which was completely innocuous and consisted mostly of him giving out advice in health subreddits. they're also deleting any post that includes his alleged manifesto and banning users for sharing it.
luigi yelled that this was "an insult to the intelligence of the american people" while he was being dragged by police and news pundits are framing it as a deranged and violent outburst. news media are picking apart details of his life to paint him as a cold-blooded and mentally ill individual. even something as innocent as playing "among us" with friends is being framed as some insidious look into an assassin's disturbed psyche, ffs.
news media are also capitalizing on luigi's supposed "bizarre and impossible to understand" politics as an obvious way to paint him as a scary individual when the guy is... a centrist, at most. whose views are similar to those of your average college-educated white guy.
multiple news media also keep harping on about how luigi comes from a rich family. an obvious attempt to break the class solidarity that's been formed around this case by continuously trying to tell us "oh he's not like you guys" while ignoring the now pretty well-documented accounts of his multiple health struggles throughout the years.
and all this, and he hasn't even been found guilty of the crime he's allegedly committed. luigi is, as of right now, still innocent until proven guilty. and the news are trying to tear him apart because they obviously fear the symbol he's becoming for low and middle class america.
reblog to give your headache to elon musk instead
“Average person gets kidnapped 5 times” factoid actually a statistical error. Kidnappings Jon, who has been kidnapped 10,000 times is an outlier and should not have been counted
Looking more like a checklist these days. I want off this ride. 😭