Fictive Culture Is Watching One Headmate Go “sigh…. I Wish I Could Be Like Him…” While The Guy

Experiences in the Alterhuman Community (and Beyond) as a Fictive

It's a weird experience being a fictional character, especially dealing with fandom, the fact that your source is fictional, and interactions with people based on that--including some of the dehumanisation that's so common toward fictionfolk. I'm gonna go into that here because I need somwhere to collect my thoughts, so this might get long. I'll be talking about my experiences as a fictive, but this could very well apply to anyone who identifies as a fictional being--fictionkin, fictionlinkers, etc.

So, I see the version of me on the screen as an AU version of me, in short. I mean, I'm me, and I don't think I even looked exactly 1:1 with my canon self--so naturally, even though events line up pretty closely, I see my source as... Almost like a fanfic of my life? Like sure, that's decidedly me, and decidedly a lot of the things that happened to me and my friends, but also not me. I'm not that guy on the screen, he's what represents me.

Even though I fully believe I got here by dying in a literal past life, my source media here is absolutely fictional to me and I just... Don't look at it in really any other way. Which I guess makes sense if you put it into my perspective--what else would it be? It really is like reading a fanfic based on your life though, or reading an article about yourself in the news. A bit of a shock, a bit of "why did they include THAT?" sprinkled in here and there, a bit awkward sometimes, and it does tend to resurface bad feelings. But overall, it's not that personal to me. I'm largely fine with it existing.

On the other hand, what is shocking is that people see me as fictional. I'm a fictional introject, from a fictional source, from the perspectives of a lot of people here. But I look at my source and I go well... Yeah, that's fiction of course, but my life is an actual thing that happened to me. Realistically I know that not everyone has spiritual beliefs and not everyone even accepts fictional identities as something "real", but man is it weird to just... Have it be spun in such a way?

I'm used to being in the media, I'm used to having cameras on me and being in the public eye. I'm used to articles and stories and posts on the internet. I'm used to fans even! But this isn't your regular, run-of-the-mill experience of people wanting to know you because you're a hero. This is people who see your life and experiences as a fun story they saw in a book or on TV, coming up to you with the idea that you're their favourite character, and not... A whole entire person. It's so damn weird.

There's still that level of disrespect that comes from people who are a little parasocial with you, but it almost hits deeper here because a lot of the time, you know they're not seeing a hero or the things you've literally done in your memories. They're seeing that guy on the screen they think is cool, and while he represents you, he's not you. And they're treating you like a celebrity because of that weird fanfic version of you on the TV or in that book.

There's usually little acknowledgement of your life or experiences as "real". When you're presenting as your fictional identity around others, you tend to get put into one of a few camps:

Cool Character from Media who I love and adore and want to talk to (and will probably get fanperson excited about it). I will probably get dispraportionally upset if Character tells me to back off a bit because I don't want my blorbo to be mad at me.

Character from Media I'm in love with and will immediately start asking invasive questions to or outright flirting with. Could get real gross real quick.

Problematic Character or Guy From Problematic Media that I instantly dislike because that's so Problematic how dare you show your face. I'm reporting you for being Character, you should change your identity if you want to exist so bad.

Character from Media who is disabled/queer/mentally ill/has any soft personality trait ever and I will now be treating you like a sweet little babyboy cinnamon roll who could not hurt a fly.

Person who identifies as Character? How interesting! I'm going to really pry and question everything from your actions in-source (to get unique perspectives from Character) and question literally everything else. Because this is Science and I'll get mad if you don't tell me everything, you need to tell me everything or you're rude.

Of course there's nuance and there's absolutely times where you'll be treated as a normal person, but the above are... So damn common. I've been here for a few months and I've already had some weird stuff happen to me simply because I'm Kirishima and people feel entitled to give me cutesy nicknames or whatever. Even without knowing me or my system at all beforehand. It's just.. So different from anything I've experienced before? Being treated like a celebrity is dehumanising enough, but being treated like a character.ai bot or just generally a form of free entertainment and not a person is so perplexing to me.

There's also that if you're from a popular source, you see stuff about yourself everywhere. Posters, plushies, advertisements, posts on social media--all of it. Some of that I'm used to already, but it's kind of weird when you're mentally aware that this is all for that twisted-mirror version of yourself and not you. And if you get a little uncomfortable at some fanart showing up out of the blue, or someone making a source related joke... You're kind of just expected to brush it off. Which yeah, I get it! It's about the source, not me, but it's still just... A weird feeling. A feeling of not being allowed to be upset because it's about the source and not literal you.

I think there needs to be a line, maybe. Not saying that fictives should be putting a stop to any media or fandom ever, just.. That maybe respect toward us for being uncomfortable with fan content due to being a fictive or fictionkin should be more normalised. It should be more okay to say "hey, I'm Character, please don't joke like that" to a friend, or "don't send me fanart of this thing, I'm Character and that's weird"--which it normally is! But there does tend to be a sort of layer of "Oh, it's because you're Character. You know that's not you, right? You shouldn't be upset, you need to source separate more."--when if most other people were to set a boundary like that, it would usually be respected. Source separation can be great, but if someone hasn't separated or doesn't want to, why is it okay to still send them material they're uncomfortable with--or at least, why do people tend to argue that the fictive should "just separate from source" instead? It... Just boils down to alterhumisia toward fictionfolk, honestly. It sucks.

There's a lot of problems with basic respect toward fictionfolk of all kinds--hell, even in the alterhuman community where it's meant to be safe. I don't know if this rant is entirely coherent or not, I don't know if there's anything noteworthy to take from it--but if you do take something from it, let it be that fictionfolk want to be treated like people. Source separated, not source separated, canon divergent or compliant, hearted, linker, 'kin or 'tive--we're people. Don't let our identities change the way you instinctually treat us. Let us be openly us, and treat us as you would anyone else.

REBLOG IF YOU LOVE YOUR HEADMATES!!!!

you there. person posting a "list of alterhuman terms" post in the community tags. name and define five alterhuman identities that ARE NOT nonhumanity or fictionkinity. if you try to use voluntary nonhumanity as one of these the dragon gets to eat you. you have five minutes.

being plural means a headmate pulling you into headspace to cuddle with you and help you go to sleep because of your& insomnia

being plural means smiling and laughing at a joke one of your headmates made, or having witty banter with them as you make a meal that you'll both be able to enjoy

being plural means a headmate going "its okay, you don't have to do this, i can do it" and you thanking them because yeah, you cant do that, and thats okay

being plural means thinking about your headmates when buying new clothes, or seeing a shirt or pair of pants for sale and going "they'd love that !!"

being plural means making one of your headmate's simplyplural profile, and spending lots of time perfecting it so that it fits them to a T

being plural means knowing you aren't alone

being plural means knowing that your headmates, your friends, your family, are always there for you

being plural means love.

THIS POST IS INCLUSIVE OF SYSTEMS OF ALL ORIGINS !!! DO NOT BRING SYSCOURSE ONTO THIS POST.

The muffled sounds of tails swishing in the open blue, listening to the generational symphonies sung by whales carried in such gentle tunes...

So vast, so terrifying, so beautiful, and so satisfying.

The ocean will always be in me, floating me in it's embrace.

I actually hate getting referred to as human. On tiktok, it's always "ur human" or "but ur human", and it gets REALLY annoying.

Like, no I am not human. I don't want to be perceived as human or a human who identifies this way. No, I AM a werewolf. I AM what I identify as.

Made for the Alterhuman Minizine Jam by @oceaniccourt. My first time making a minizine. It was tiring but rewarding.

You might be a soulbonder if…

You are a writer/roleplayer whose fictional characters “have a will of their own” or “refuse to do what they’re supposed to”

You experience fictional entities sharing your mind/body in a unique way

You have the sense that fictional characters spontaneously or gradually take up residence in your mind as full people.

You feel like you can ‘channel’ fictional characters spirits  the way a medium would channel the spirits of dead people.

You have a fully or partially realized internal space where characters interact in your mind with one another and/or with you

You ‘just know’ things about certain characters even though they were never stated in their source material, whether you are the author or not. (character’s exact height, favorite ice cream, etc)

Someone in fiction, or in real life, addresses a certain character and a reply just automatically comes out of your mouth.

You get into whole conversations with people ‘as’ a fictional character without meaning to

You experience periods of being a fictional character/a fictional character inhabiting your body (shifts/fronting)

You pose a question mentally to a character and they answer back.

You ‘sense’ the presence of a certain character in your mind mentally/emotionally

You sense that a character has a certain emotion for you/or wants something from/for you

You feel an emotional connection/friendship with a character that feels returned

If any of these sound like experiences you’ve had, you might be a soulbonder!

You can find out more about soulbonding here.

Whenever I see someone saying they “wish they were a system,” I don’t think: “Oh how DARE they try to mock this shit that debilitates me every day!”

I think, “I wonder what in this world could make them feel like they need to have multiple voices in their head.” I think, “Are they lonely..? Did they even have any friends whilst growing up..? Were they neglected..?”

I understand because I also felt this way as a little kid, elementary school age (5-10). **I** wanted to be less alone as a kid, so I created imaginary characters that began to separate and distinguish themselves from one another. While yes, I had some major events of trauma, my trauma was what I thought as “monotonous” or “insignificant.” I just wanted someone to talk to, someone to confide in. I didn’t feel safe telling an adult what I went through, so it was stored in another alter.

You guys are so quick to jump at someone you have no information on in any way. You don’t know how educated this person is on the complexities of DID, and you don’t know what the person went through at all.

Please stop being so harsh and aggressive towards people figuring themselves out.. you would want that grace too..

Wanted to make a positivity post regarding some things that we see fake-claimed based on our experiences.

So shout out to systems who:

Are mostly fictives!

Can sometimes/frequently willingly switch!

Have low amnesia barriers!

Have little to no difference in how alters type/speak!

Aren't entirely sure about being a system!

Are certain in being a system!

Speak aloud more often then internally!

Have/had maladaptive daydreaming!

Split due to hyperfixations!

Have had alters fuse due to trauma!

Openly switch in public!

Split tons of headmates at once!

Have had some sort of communication since childhood!

Don't want to fuse!

Don't have access to their headspace memory!

Have triggers that pull alters OUT of front!

Believe your own experiences! If you feel like you might be plural, you probably are.