HOW TO SAY I'M FUCKED IN JAPANESE? Where Lili Probably Shouldn't Be In This Workshop And Yet, Here She

they play their own game of pick and choose — his comments on the masses do little to appeal her to go out of her way to ask for another favor from another person she would rather not spend a second of her time with.

the thought, itself, made her moment here with seunghyun seem the slightest bit more bearable than any of the other options made available. at least she wouldn’t get hit on, proposed to, and/or suddenly arranged to be married. all of things she was trying to avoid with seunghyun’s mother — but her way with words was all too tempting. 

her eyes follow his line of sight to a woman in dangerously tall heels and a purse that looked like it was from marry poppin’s on xanax. “oh, she seems to love you.” then she frowns, eyes redirected to his seemingly nonchalance. “what ish? does she get nicer whenever she gets a touch up on her migrating zyderm?” lili was more preferential to eating her duck rather than seeing it on the face of some over-aged mistress.

Seunghyun snorts. "Nothing? Nothing at all? What a shame..." He knew so little about Lili other than his mother's infatuation with her bone structure - but she was beginning to seem a lot more foolish than she looked. Who would subject themselves to an evening of this willingly?

He bends to swipe at his pant leg with a subtle scowl, rising up to cross his arms over his chest. He eyes the elder waddling this way and that by the terrace's edge, muttering something to himself.

"Do you know who that is?" the model asks with a quirk of his brow. "New appointee on the board of directors at Hanhwa group. Total basket case. If I even so much as say hello I'm going to be stuck listening to him babble on for the next three hours..."

He scans the area for a moment, spying a woman frantically searching through her purse. He can't quite put a finger on it but she seems so familiar... They lock eyes and she frowns almost immediately. Oh, that's right. One of his mother's acquaintances whose shifting filler he just found so interesting ( and often commented on it quite loudly ). "Why don't you ask her? She's friendly. ...Ish."

“oh, thank god.” she says under her breath at the sight of minkyu. relief floods her senses while a smile breaks onto her face; if there was ever a time for lili to be thankful — maybe it would be now. 

finding out it was minkyu who had been selected as her secret date for the afternoon was a blessing in disguise. lili wouldn’t say she was an introverted personality, however, she is someone who did not take kindly to strangers well. something about her resting bitch face and her overly prickly personality seemed to deter people and lili could never quite understand it. 

( couldn’t or wouldn’t — )

she is, nonetheless, at a loss for words as he comes her way. her finger immediately going to the kuromi plushie with a tease on her tongue and a smile already riding her lips — the nerves she had felt just minutes prior already a thing of the past. the cameras a figment of her imagination as she stops in front of minkyu with a laugh. “what — no way, i should have known this was yours! if i knew i would have chosen my melody instead of this.” she takes the snake with a small shake, “did you guess it right, though? tell me, who did you think you were going to meet today? i’m all ears.” 

she had chosen the snake to represent her chinese zodiac, other than that she hadn’t really put too much thought into the secret item. 

“i’m so glad it’s you, though. i feel like i’ll have a fun time today.” which, honest to god, lili finds herself not lying about — if it had been anyone else, she wonders how much of herself she could show before finding herself retreating into the shell she knew others would gravitate towards. with minkyu, lili knew she didn’t need to try as hard. like she said: blessing in disguise.

"can you guess what we'll be doing today? hm, hm." if it wasn't already obvious with all the kites flying overhead.

Appearing on a dating show should, in theory, leave Minkyu feeling at least a tad jittery, perhaps a touch anxious. Yet, all he exudes is the confidence of a leading character in a romantic anime–it's like a dream come true for him to be at the heart of a romance-themed scenario, his favourite genre, even if the whole affair is staged and far from reality.

Undeterred, he's styled his hair into that signature side part and wears a boyish grin on his lips as he strides towards the designated spot, brightly coloured kites adorning the sky.

"I wonder what the date idea is," he muses aloud, mindful of the ongoing filming–after all, the viewers can't tune into his inner thoughts unless he vocalises them. Running a hand through his carefully styled locks, he scans the area and spots the jellycat snake he's been instructed to seek out, just ahead.

And when his eyes lift to meet the owner's face, his own expression lights up instantly; it's a genuine reaction, devoid of any pretense or scripting, as he hoists the Kuromi plushie and waves at his designated date partner as he approaches her.

"Lilissi!" he calls out, adding the honorific for the sake of public television. "Wow, I can't believe it. You're really my date partner!" His words spill out with genuine excitement, pausing briefly as he stands before her, holding up his item. "I bet you didn't expect me to be yours, huh?"

@LGCENT just posted a photo!

angel of mine  ꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱  

#lgctrainees #lgcent #xulili

there are days when lili is a little too into her head — these days include the times she’s stressed before a monthly evaluation, chipping a nail, mascara running when the tears just can’t stop, the impending doom that her birthday is coming a little too soon, and right before a big date. 

she isn’t one to third wheel, but she is lili and selfishness was just something her friend and her latest boyfriend was going to have to deal with unless they’d rather spend the rest of their date watching her fall into a spiral of nerves ( because lili nervous was never a good sign ). what she didn’t expect was the consequence of such selfishness would lead them to dumping lili on the first ride they could find and running off to leave her to her demise.

lili: 0, disco pang pang: 1

it was safe to say that lili had no idea what she was in for as she was herded onto the contraption; feeling somewhat like cattle being wrangled onto the back of a truck. the unease from the structural integrity of the ride intensified the feeling tenfold especially when she heard the creaks and the whirrs as it started up — and suddenly she was being knocked from her seat; manicured hands reaching out for nothing but air as she feels her body afloat.

once this was over, she was going to murder her friend — that’s if she survives this.

while her screams were muffled by her mask, there was nothing that could hide the horror in her eyes as she finds herself jostled higher and higher with each rough jerk of the ride; hands scrambling to grab whatever she could as she feels herself fly from one part of the ride to another until fingertips brush against a shirt — from there she’s holding on for dear life, “don’t you dare let me go!” nearly crying into the stranger’s neck as she does so.

⸻ WHEN WE DISCO ( @lgclili )

Sunday - cheat day - was the one day of the week Byeongkwan could do whatever he wanted. Lounge around the trainee dorms in his underwear all morning? Check. Spend an hour at his favorite record store? Absolutely. Go on blind dates? If the stars aligned ( translation, if one of his friends made a very convincing powerpoint presentation and managed to successful send her buddies off to meet somewhere in Incheon - ). But most importantly, he could eat whatever the hell he wanted. This usually meant sampling every street food stall within arm's reach in the hour leading up to said... alignment.

Sure, he was supposed to be on some strict diet, dedicated to maximizing gym time or whatever. But what his personal trainer didn't know wouldn't hurt him...

See, the problem was his trainer did know ( How? Was he psychic? Have a sixth sense for Byeongkwan slacking off?! ), and he seemed to have made it his life mission to catch the trainee in the act - mid inhale of three odeng skewers shoved into one bite.

"Oh, shit."

The smart move would've been to accept his fate ( 500 push ups and stair sprints until he saw stars - ), but instead Byeongkwan made the executive decision to dodge. One day he might appreciate having someone so invested in his fitness, but today was not that day. So, he took off. Left, right, then a slide through a group of pedestrians, all while cursing his choice of sneakers. Somehow, he ended up in a line of college students waiting for a turn on the Disco Pang Pang ride. No one batted an eye at the random guy in a hoodie, mask, and oversized shades ( the pinnacle of subtlety ) sliding into their group as they filed onto the ride.

Settling into his seat, he nodded along to their small talk, murmuring something vaguely enthusiastic. His attention, though, was fixed on the man standing below, arms crossed and glaring. Byeongkwan lowered his shades, wiggling his eyebrows before leaning back smugly. He'd rather endure three hours spinning on this thing than -

"Woah. Is it always this fast?!" he sputtered, scrambling to grip one of the guardrails as the ride jerked to life, tossing its passengers like ragdolls.

satisfied with his answer, lili only beams in response. maybe she should call it luck that the cameras were rolling — getting an complimentary answer from minkyu as so has never been easier. 

“alright, alright, picasso. i can’t wait to see what you come up with.” she teases, eyes shining bright as she looks from the set of colors she had already swiped to her side to him. 

every now and then, her eyes briefly glance his way — a mirror of the image she was trying to transfer to the kite itself. unfortunately, lili was no artist — not in this way at least — but she makes the most of her materials and does her best to her strengths.

in the end, her kite looks more reminiscent of those old school shoujo mangas she and taeha used to pour over back in high school in between competitions; how she had remembered such a small detail is beyond her — but here it is, drawn in it’s full length: accented with big yellow stars and overly-drawn pink and blue flowers to surround the image of minkyu in the style of a shoujo protagonist from the 90’s. 

her ears perking when she hears his completion and she immediately snaps up the kite before his eyes could take in what she had made — smile already just that bit triumphant and overall pleased with what she had come up with.

“okay — i’m ready.” she takes a breath before initiating the countdown —

“one …. two …. three!” 

once sung, she spins her kite in time with his only to feel her lips crinkle in amusement; laughter already on the cusp of her tongue as she tries to choke out a — “is that supposed to be keroppi?? or is it kermit?” 

Off-camera, if this were truly Lili and Minkyu in their natural states, her comment about Hollywood actresses would be met with a snarky reply;

Minkyu would likely respond with something along the lines of how she’s pretty cute, but there’s no way she could compare to someone like Anne Hathaway.

This, of course, would all be in playful jest, never serious, always lighthearted. But the cameras are rolling, and while Minkyu always strives to present his most genuine self to the viewers and fans ( slash girlfriends ), he knows this moment calls for sweetness;

it's a moment meant to quicken Lili's heartbeat and those of the audience.

So he gives her a sweet smile, one that seems reserved solely for her, and gently lifts his free hand to fix a stray lock of her bangs. "You should already know you're much cuter than any Hollywood actress." he says, his voice soft and sincere.

Even as they sit down, his perpetual half-smile remains, his eyes scanning the array of tools before quickly picking up the right markers and pens to decorate the kite.

"You'll be surprised. I'm the modern Picasso!" he declares with a playful brow wiggle in her direction, almost charming, before his focus returns to the kite.

He's chosen the same colors as her favorite plushie, even attempting to draw a chibi version of it. Though it hasn’t turned out perfectly, it's recognizable enough.

After a few minutes, he looks back up, a grin on his lips as he hides the result of his craft with his arms. "Okay, let's show what we've created on the count of three!"

PUBLIC ENEMY # 1 (KIDS: 1, LILI: 0). lili hates kids, that is fact, lili is stuck in a pile of stuffed animals because of her public enemy number one (kids), that is also fact — @lgcasami

just when lili was starting to think she had done enough volunteering to grant her an all-exclusive ticket to heaven, she’s implored to do more — and this time it was with her least favorite type of person: a child.

now, lili was no child-eating heathen a la hansel and gretel but she — for lack of better words — had an aversion to them; much like an allergy. the mere sight and/or thought of them seemed to prickle her skin in the same way a rash would. not only were they gross, saliva-slobbering cretins — they just annoyed the fuck out of her.

( unless they were the ones who showered her in unnecessary compliments then maybe she would give them a pass but it still didn’t stop them from swiping their snot-ridden noses across their stubby fingers and dressing her cashmere sweaters in boogers — all from experience, all that she experienced that very day )

call her heartless — sure, she could be — but despite her smiles and her laughter, falling into a pile of plushies was not how lili wanted to spend her saturday; especially when after being pushed into said pile of plushies, she found herself adept from getting out of this germ-infested pool of stuffed animals. 

a groan escapes her, ready to accept her fate — perhaps, she’ll die here in this engorged display of fluffy opulence and they’ll name a wall after her — choosing to lay in the pit with a hand sticking out as she weakly yelps, “can anyone help me?”

shen xiaoting

she doubts it — but lili should be thankful for zoe’s optimism. it might be the only thing keeping her hopeful for the rest of the day until the ride home. just a couple more hours and they were home free — at least, this is what lili thought.

lili was not a work with what’s available but god told her beggars could not be choosers — and it is only today that she realizes the truth of those exact words. with a grim smile and a hand to hide it she feigns a dramatic sigh before falling onto zoe’s shoulder, “don’t worry, zoe, once we get back, you’ve got a ginseng chicken soup with your name on it on my dime, i swear it.”

only a couple more hours, she tells herself, and lili is near ready to  buy their whole dormitory soup if she needs to speed up the process. sitting up straight, she raises a brow, genuinely pondering what part of the weekend that she enjoyed — sparingly — there were times here and there she liked, if she truly could get out of her nitpicking ways to admit it. 

“mm,” she thinks for a minute longer because it was genuinely that hard for her to find some part of the weekend she actually found enjoyable — because knowing lili, this weekend was not her top ten — nor top one hundred — best picks of a good time. “spending time with you and jiah, i guess. but like —“ she lowers her voice to a whisper, a hand raised to cover her lips lest their be lip-readers in their midst. “i already hang out with you guys back home and at least there we have cell service.” before dropping her hand. “but i guess the chickens were kinda cute — smelly, but cute. kinda like you.” she laughs before pinching the other’s cheek, “kidding but you definitely did stink after friday.” 

— 🐰 » 

Zoe watched Lili with a mix of amusement and concern, noting the exhaustion etched in her friend's features despite her attempts to maintain a smile. Being on their feet for hours wasn't easy, especially when trying to promote something as seemingly mundane as soap bars at a fair.

"Grace, indeed," Zoe replied, her accent softening with empathy. She could sense Lili's frustration, the subtle strain in her voice as she talked about luck. Zoe leaned more toward believing in hard work, but she understood how luck could sometimes sway things.

Zoe chuckled and shook her head. "Well, you're so right there, but I guess we'll just have to work with what's available. Who knows, maybe we'll be pleasantly surprised today," she said optimistically to Lili's mention of the disappointing food, though she shared her doubts about the culinary offerings.

The mention of ginseng chicken soup brought a wistful smile to Zoe's face. "That does sound amazing," she agreed, imagining the warmth of the soup on a chilly day like today. "But hey, even if the food isn't great, at least we have each other's company," she added, playfully nudging Lili.

Zoe's gaze softened as she looked at her friend, silently offering her support. "Hey, amidst all this chaos, did you manage to enjoy any part of the day?" she asked, genuinely interested in hearing Lili's perspective.

໒꒱ .  TRAINEE MISSION # 16 、INTERVIEW .

lili had never been the spill your guts, vulnerable in front of the camera kind of person.

but she likens this scenario as a part to play. a role she must succeed to in order to get to where she must. and where that place is is where people liked that vulnerable in front of the camera, spill your silly guts kind of crap. 

so, lili does what she can — musters up the silly little guts that would get her somewhat of a good standing and puts on that darling, pretty smile her grandma loves.

WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT FOR TODAY ?

“my favorite? it has to be —” she racks her brain for something memorable that happened today: she had almost fell in chicken shit — it literally was everywhere, it was probably all up in the grooves of her boots — the smell was permanently stuck in her nose no matter what jaekyung had tried, she was tired — lili did not want to revisit such a memory. and yet, here she re-tells the tale like it was some funny comedic sketch that had brought her to her tears in joy and jest. a darling smile brought to her lips even if the only thing she wished to say was that she was thankful that the day was finally over. “getting to see all the cute chickens, we even got to see some eggs hatch in the incubator, it was really cool. i’ve never seen that before.”

HOW DID YOU FEEL ABOUT THE CHALLENGE GIVEN TO YOUR TEAM ?

“hard.” probably the most truthful thing she’ll utter this weekend — and it was only friday. despite grinning and bearing it for what she could, today had really done a number for her. “bearing through the chicken coop was … an experience, i was honestly kind of scared — i thought the chickens would attack us. can you imagine getting chased by a chicken?” she shudders at the horror of the thought, for effect.

WHO DID YOU FEEL YOU GOT CLOSER TO ?

she pauses, thinking about it for a good second. even if most of the day she had stuck herself, like glue, to jiah, lili couldn’t deny that there had been quite a number of trainees she had inadvertently gotten closer to. not that she could help it, in between biting her tongue at the complaints that wished spill from her tongue, she knew the others could tell she was having a hard time and, in the end, was thankful for those who helped to make her dire experience even just a sniff better. “i’d say jaekyung? she even offered her towel to me when she saw that i was struggling.” sure, lili was being a tad bit dramatic but the stench was truly nauseating, the viewers would be glad they’d didn’t see lili hurl.

WHAT WAS ONE LESSON YOU’VE LEARNED FROM THIS EXPERIENCE ?

nothing. lili learned absolutely nothing — she wished to say, but knows that isn’t what they came here for. that that wasn’t what the viewers wanted to hear. so instead, lili works the courage of what a menial, less troublesome, more humble person would think: she knew no one of this manner so she was struggling but she makes do — “that it’s good for all of us to take a moment to slow down and feel the wind in our hair.” something like that, right?

“all the aunties here were super cute, too, maybe their fashion sense here is another lesson to remember.” 

୨୧     THE DECISION     :     DATE LOTTERY # 2025

going into her decisions, lili had half the mind to deny minkyu another date — how dare he try to one up her in front of millions!

least of all with surprises that he knew lili hated!

( the act of surprise, not the gift from a surprise — never a gift )

it would show him that she was not one to be trifled with! she was miffed! absolutely horrified! ( she says this but was she really — had it really been so bad — no, she was just upset over nothing because her flair of dramatics could only handle so much all while under the guise of her public persona )

and minkyu — that sneaky little devil! — knew that lili could never deny him on national television. so, she follows the narrative — playing the role of some awe-struck, lovesick fool who had the time of her life laughing along to minkyu’s cute little quips and his gab and gall for surprise.

seated, legs crossed primly at the ankles as she’s asked those three special words: “will you continue (again)?”

and ( like the drama queen she was ) just like that, she’s smiling; all teeth — grin shining bright as a little blush dusts along the apples of her cheeks as if just the thought of another date had her sheepish ( as if! but the role was far more important than the cringe of it all ); that seeing minkyu again after such a wonderful date would only overjoy her.

( god, she was going to give minkyu a piece of her mind once this was all over )

“it was such a good date, minkyu-씨 could have chosen anything else but he thought to do something he had never done and i liked it, it was very … courageous of him.” thankfully, it stopped at courageous and didn’t turn to anything worse. lili was not someone you should have as your emergency contact. “i really wasn’t expecting the ice cream tower surprise — how it was even made is even more crazy.” it truly defied gravity and lili was not sure how they got through it the way they did.

“if i could, i’d say,” a thoughtful and suspenseful pause for effect. “the adventure should continue, yes.”

however, the second these cameras turn off, minkyu was getting a second helping of a smackdown.