There Are Days When Lili Is A Little Too Into Her Head — These Days Include The Times She’s Stressed

“would it be so bad if i said i didn’t mind a kfc,” now who was she and what had she done with xu lili? the girl who complained about the smell of fried chicken oil and how it would induce a zillion and one underground pimples by morning seemed to be nowhere to be seen. “at least they would welcome our presence.” 

would they make a cake out of chicken legs if she mentioned that it was her birthday?

“yea —“ her eyes drift to her heels, “for sure, definitely not dressed for anything outdoorsy. let’s also not climb any hills, i don’t think my body can take any more stress.” she knows seoul is made up of nothing but hills but if anything, it was a subtle yet desperate plea for a taxi ride rather than slumming it in the subway.

her steps begin to slow as she thinks over the options more seriously, feeling the chill in the air as she suddenly comes to a stop and is not incensed by the warmth from walking. “mmm, i’d say warm and cozy. anything but cold, please.”

"we can make it work, even if its..." jisoo side eyes lili, "a hole in the wall." at this point, most things truly were closed around this time, but he's sure there were some homely mom and pop shops, or businesses that knew they could take advantage of these days, where everyone else had off. "i promise, i am not dragging you to KFC or anything that defaults in that direction." that would make it even more of an unhappy birthday now, wouldn't it?

"but you didn't even have a birthday cake... we're going to have to remedy that." hopefully it didn't mean him baking one but if it had to happen. if his eye does a slight twitch, jisoo doesn't comment.

"not to be completely lacking adventure, it is not about me and i'd rather not completely misguide it so would you prefer something warm, or cold, relaxing... cozy, or random and," heaven forbid, "i am not going to give you the option of outdoorsy because a, we aren't dressed for it and b, i'd rather us not end up sick."

୨୧     THE DECISION     :     DATE LOTTERY # 2025

going into her decisions, lili had half the mind to deny minkyu another date — how dare he try to one up her in front of millions!

least of all with surprises that he knew lili hated!

( the act of surprise, not the gift from a surprise — never a gift )

it would show him that she was not one to be trifled with! she was miffed! absolutely horrified! ( she says this but was she really — had it really been so bad — no, she was just upset over nothing because her flair of dramatics could only handle so much all while under the guise of her public persona )

and minkyu — that sneaky little devil! — knew that lili could never deny him on national television. so, she follows the narrative — playing the role of some awe-struck, lovesick fool who had the time of her life laughing along to minkyu’s cute little quips and his gab and gall for surprise.

seated, legs crossed primly at the ankles as she’s asked those three special words: “will you continue (again)?”

and ( like the drama queen she was ) just like that, she’s smiling; all teeth — grin shining bright as a little blush dusts along the apples of her cheeks as if just the thought of another date had her sheepish ( as if! but the role was far more important than the cringe of it all ); that seeing minkyu again after such a wonderful date would only overjoy her.

( god, she was going to give minkyu a piece of her mind once this was all over )

“it was such a good date, minkyu-씨 could have chosen anything else but he thought to do something he had never done and i liked it, it was very … courageous of him.” thankfully, it stopped at courageous and didn’t turn to anything worse. lili was not someone you should have as your emergency contact. “i really wasn’t expecting the ice cream tower surprise — how it was even made is even more crazy.” it truly defied gravity and lili was not sure how they got through it the way they did.

“if i could, i’d say,” a thoughtful and suspenseful pause for effect. “the adventure should continue, yes.”

however, the second these cameras turn off, minkyu was getting a second helping of a smackdown. 

EYE OF THE STORM     ୨୧    @yujinlgc     / backdated !

it was an ill-kept secret that lili was rotten to the core. sure, she liked to think of herself as a better, bigger person when it came to most things but even the ugly head of jealousy was hard to hide. 

harder to hide when one of her close friends — at least, closer than most — had just debuted before her. 

yujin deserved it, of course she did, she worked harder than anyone she knew but that couldn’t — wouldn’t — stop lili from secretly wishing for her despair, her downfall, because deep down that was just how vile her heart was — how despicable her ambition had ruined her. but it wasn’t like it was yujin’s fault that lili was left behind — falling through the cracks so far below to not even be considered — no, it wasn’t yujin’s fault at all.

and yet, that wouldn’t — couldn’t — stop lili from blaming her. 

but like any bigger, better person, lili was trying her best to keep it hidden; smiling when she sees her friend at her debut showcase. grinning and bearing it when she sees her friend’s face all over her social media. she was the bigger and better person, but lili was seething through it all.

very much so as she sits beside her so-called friend and listens, with bated breath, as the other vented about struggling with her new-found fame, god — it was taking everything within her from rolling her eyes, livid at what she was hearing. 

“so,” lili deadpans, about a word or two from being fed up, trying to simmer her anger as she gnaws at the straw of her matcha latte. “what do you want me to say, yujin?”

CHALLENGER APPROACHES ❗️❗️ XU LILI AS ❪ BAYONETTA ❫

•  ໒꒱ . CHUSEOK # 2024 、

lili wakes in a bed not her own on september seventeen.

the middle of the week, from below, seoul had become a ghost town; veteraned city dwellers crawling back to their hometowns for the three-day holiday. from where she woke, lili lays in bed, still stuffed in her pajamas and the lush terry-cloth robe afforded by the hotel.

it takes her a moment to react, still trying to figure out how and why she was anywhere but her bed in the dormitory or her bed in her apartment in cheongdam then she remembers and kind of wishes she doesn’t. pulling the covers over her head when she hears the notable knock on the door, the sign of the room service she had requested the night before when she had been left on her own by the end of the day.

ramming her feet into the pair of slippers at the end of the bed, she makes to the door — still not ready to start the day but it was now or never.

and well, lili was never one to dwell on spilled milk, anyways.

( even if the traces of such a thing were still found having run dry on her cheeks )

having promised her september sixteen for her time, lili still could not believe it. it was unheard of, yes, and lili, quite frankly, hadn’t expected her grandmother to be so proactive in scheduling for her time and yet, lili could not help but be excited. 

expected to spend the day, arriving to seoul that very afternoon, they had booked a quiet lunch at a hotel in myeongdong. it had been months since she last saw her grandmother, was it last year that she had seen her last? it had been that long.

with a laundry list of grievances, lili puts it behind her, puts her best ( read: newest ) dress on and rides to myeongdong with a smile that could not be contained. even the driver, who’s known lili since she had arrived in seoul, finds it questionable but doesn’t press her for it, lest it loses its shine from the most minor intrusion.

arriving on time — consideredlate in her grandmother’s book — she rides to the top floor, all the nerves and anguish bundled in her tiny fist as she clutches her fendi to her chest and steps, head held high, towards the hostess.

the expected, “your party has already arrived, follow me.” makes lili’s insides twist but her smile doesn’t fall; keeping in time with the woman as she follows behind to a pair of doors centered at the back of the restaurant, it’s patrons littered to a select few due to the nature of the holiday.

when the other makes a move to open the doors, lili stops her, thanking her for her guidance only for lili to take a hand to the knob herself. she needed the moment to be alone, she needed the breath that she had been holding in ever since she had stepped off the lift.

with a brief one, two — inhale, exhale — she pulls the door away from its hinges, stepping into the room.

and her guise falls.

her expectations have run dry and to no one’s surprise, her smile finally loses its luster.

“so, where is she?” she asks, taking her seat across from one of her grandmother’s lesser-of-importance assistants. one who probably knew korean and wouldn’t have minded the mini-vacation, the one that she had been granted after she took care of the errand her grandmother had sent her on.

the errand?

breaking the news to her beloved granddaughter.

“beijing. they’re awarding her for her work in the eco-development of ….” that’s when lili tunes her out, feeling the grip on her fist loosen as her eyes lose sight of the person in front of her and all she wants to do — all she really can do is wait there until the woman finishes whatever she was ordered to do.

“the chairwoman paid for your stay at the hotel, if you’d like to eat we can also order a meal.”

that’s when lili stands, fingers now digging into the beads of her bag. “no, let’s go to the room, i’ve suddenly lost my appetite.”

she watched the assistant round the table and knew the other was counting her blessings; out of all the things lili could do, she was lucky to have found a day lili was too tired to try.

making someone’s life hell could be saved for another day, lili was too busy trying to pick up the pieces of her pride.

they ride down to a different level and lili follows her down the winding hallway to a suite on the far side of the floor. 

a hand waves the key card to its function and the click of the door has it open before lili can slip from her daze.

“would you like me to —”

“actually,” she cuts in, then, hand on the door to stop the other from entering. “i’d like to be alone. please wish my grandmother a happy 中秋节 for me.”

she had the sense to know that, at least, her grandmother would check in whether the assistant had completed her job before she would ever pick up the phone to actually call lili about it — not when the fuse and all the dramatics that come with it had been lit.

leaving lili with the room key, the door closes and the first thing lili does is toss her bag to the bed, noticing the packed suitcase by the balcony door and she can’t help but laugh. the woman really had planned it all despite saying she would make time for her.

and rather than own up to her mistake of ever promising anything, she found a way around it, with a non-apology of money — the stuffed pack had barely fit in her bag — and a paid stay at a luxury hotel hotel. 

lili knew she shouldn’t have held her expectations — 

fuck, but she had already let them run away with her before she could help it, she thinks, sinking herself into the comfort of a warm duvet and the low-lit chandelier. feeling the depths of the silence render her emotional. 

had the quiet ever felt so lonely as it did today? 

she tells herself she’ll allow herself the tears. she’s granted it this one time and after that, she’ll never think of it again for the rest of the year.

what lili doesn’t consider is the way the tears come and never stop.

FAINTING SPELLS     ୨୧     @lgcjunyi   /   on most days, lili could hardly care about the rigidity of hierarchy and its subsequent rules as outlined by said order. but today was not most days — lili had checked the list once, twice, three times and it has definitely passed the reservation time! 

it was her turn to use the practice room — and the last thing lili liked was when her time was wasted, especially on a day before her beloved day off. starting the week strong could only be graced with ending the week just as strongly, and unfortunately, in order for that to happen, she had to finish practice. that is, if her patience didn’t wear off as thinly as it was starting to.

looking through the rooms until she comes across the one she had reserved, she peeks into the window — finding it oddly quiet — huh? was it not in use?

opening the door, she’s shocked to find the collapsed girl inside, buffering as she stares, wide-eyed at the girl sprawled in the middle of the room — fuck, was she breathing? did she need cpr? 

how did that go again? 

scrambling to her feet, lili does the first thing that comes to mind, reaching for her water bottle, she dumps it on the girl, that should wake her up, right?

@LGCENT just posted a photo!

fun fact! did you know that the year of the snake is my chinese zodiac? so, as my zodiac intends, and as the clock strikes on the last hour of my birthday, i declare that this will be my year of transformation, renewal and spiritual growth! 

#lgctrainees #lgcent #xulili

lili speaks with an ease of someone who didn’t care of the eyes on her — then again, when had people looking at her ever mattered?

in fact, for lili, it was always the more — the merrier. 

she basked in the idea of eyes on her, whether or not, it was deserved. lili was vain, ambitious and had the cut-shit guts to get what she wanted— this she knew. and it was this same thirst and vanity that she saw in spades in jieun — maybe that was why it bit into the very envious tremble that she kept at bay beneath her smile. 

“oh but of course — we all know how some actress can be so, so high and mighty. primadonnas.” the words dance along a line of dismissiveness but her smile speaks otherwise, directed to jieun in a way only lili knew the other would recognize. like a snake as it slithered up to your throat, coiling tight in between words that could have been passed off as nothing. 

( except coming from lili — it was never really nothing ) 

“you guys have that saying right — the more a diva fusses, the more they try to compensate for their … shortcomings, is it?” she feigns the slightest uncertainty — as if her lack of korean fluency would tangle her words. “but you don’t have that problem, though — you’re always so well taken care of.” 

old vices are hard to relinquish, even when she has become a better person and is on her best behavior on the set. it's that same space that makes her wary of the friendly grins that would easily pull the rug out from under her.

it doesn't help she is there too, in a habitat that jieun judged natural only to her and her fellow actors, staff and production team, mingling around the people she tried so hard to impress and to make see her in a good light. especially now.

so even if the conversation a few steps from her is irrelevant and she's busy reading the script by herself as she waits for the next scene, jieun is somewhat alert. enough for the scoffs and good samaritan masquerade not to go unnoticed, but she doesn't look up to check who they are talking about. she doesn't even need to, because it only takes a couple of seconds for one of the managers to kindly offer her a cup of iced coffee.

"oh? you're a lifesaver! thank you manager-nim," she smiles genuinely as she takes the coffee and the man runs somewhere else, probably after another actor he had to take care of ( he wasn't even her manager ). the actress turns to face lili and flashes a smile at the girl, sipping her drink.

the subtle implications that jieun is making his life hard or abusing her power hit a nerve — not that it was hard to rub her the wrong way. jieun was guilty of many sins, but she never mistreated her staff or co-stars as her work and everyone in it were important to her. but, right now, she can only swallow her annoyance and do what she does best: acting.

"oh yeah, he is always in a hurry but is very attentive... it's not easy to look after so many of us," she points out with a grin, keeping it safe in case anyone eavesdrops. "it's a relief to know there are so many people looking after them too. you know how rude some celebrities can be..."

lili could only agree. animal crossing had always been advertised as an easy going slice of life type of game — no hard level, no cheat codes — that is until the new game on the switch had completely changed up the way they played and instead of being a mayor or a random villager of some honky-tonk town, you were now stranded on a base island with all the workings to make it your own. it had taken lili a long week to fully understand the mechanics but after that, everything was like clockwork — so, in kind, she could see where hyuk’s wariness of the game came from.

though, it did not stop her from wanting to push him into a pitfall. 

glancing at the screen, lili counts the branches that have fallen out of hyuk’s pockets and frowns, there was enough … but she was tempted to see him get stung by bees. it was all in the name of entertainment, anyways! hyuk would surely understand, right?

right!

“mm, i think we should try a couple more trees. maybe we can get some more coins.” she supplies, in what is a helpful tone, trying to disguise her need for amusement with a considerate grace.

“i think it looks easier than i thought”, hyuk found himself saying, slowly his suspicious aura fading, giving place to a more comfortable and trustworthy person; he could admit it was hard for him to open up immediately to people, especially when he was playing an important role, as a trainee contracted to work for an important brand. “i guess it helps when the joystick fits this good in my hands, don’t you agree?”

he didn’t really remember the last time he played games in a videogame, his parents ensured he could have everything he wanted, but he never thought about that, not when they all looked so expensive. so hyuk played the part of pretending he knew what he was doing and absorbed what people around him did, so he could still be a part of the cool kids gang.

“a stone for an axe? axes look important, maybe we should try to find it then.” he replied, scavenging his pockets, emptying them to show it to lili’s character. “this is what i have, do you think it’s enough for a net or should i shake more trees?”

truth be told, lili had been using the fact that she was a foreigner as her golden ticket. not being able to understand this or that had done wonders for getting over-zealous coaches to get off her dick back, even if she 100% did understood this and that, they didn’t need to know that, right? right. 

and it seems that the girl before her had the same exact idea in mind.

“not really, just felt —” she pauses, thinking over her words. “today wasn’t my day.”

she snorts, eyes passing over to the coach who still hasn’t let up, hovering to the side — trying his hardest to understand a tongue he’d never quite master. “obviously.” for that — lili could not help the smile curl upon her lips, warm and welcoming — something so much unlike her, lili would have felt a chill roll up her spine if she had been the one to have seen it firsthand. 

so she stands to her full height, shoulders rolled back as she picks up her forgotten yogurt cup and takes the other up on her offer. “what did you say your name was?” she tosses the cup to the far-end bin, off to the side. "i'm lili."

Amelia feels some what connected to the other female. It was like she was similar to her and enjoyed chaos as much as she did. Of course, her being of Chinese descent too made their connection even better. Amelia maintained her expression in order to hide her true intentions from the staff around them.

❛ Yeah I've been there before. Is there a specific reason or-? ❜

Amelia noticed the other female's eyes and a slight smirk appeared on her face. So perhaps she was up for some fun and a chance to mess with the coach. Amelia, still speaking Mandarin, explained her thoughts. ❛ Well, clearly the coach can't speak Mandarin so we could have some fun with this. I'm feeling chaotic today. ❜