Straight From The Field #2

Max *waiting for Jane*: ugh where is she?

Jane *running and slightly out of breath*: sorry I'm late. I got you a gift.

Max: aw, what is it?

Jane: a rock. It looked cool.

Max: okay, cool.

Three Months Later:

Jane: can I borrow a sweater?

Max: sure, in the closet.

Jane: *opens the closet*

Jane:

Jane: is that, is that a box of all the rocks I gave you?

Max: uhh...

Jane *tearing up slightly*: I didn't think you keep them!

💙Elmax with stars and moons in pastel blue!💙

Eleven: W-who do I shoot!?

Max: Them!

Clone: No! They’re lying! Remember? I love you.

Eleven: *shoots the clone*

Max: What the-

Eleven: ‘I love you’ sounds like something you wouldn’t say to me.

Max: Ok, WOW-

BTS as Dad Tweets

Namjoon: One thing I definitely underestimated when I first became a father was the great amount of joy embarrassing my kids would bring me.

Seokjin: I constantly google “how to put your kids up for adoption” so my kids can find it on my search history and know that I’m not messing around.

Yoongi: [in car drop off line at school]

Dad, this isn’t even our school. “Look kids…Daddy’s hungover. Just go in there & learn something, ok?”

Hoseok: Parents say a lot of things over and over. For example, I just said “Please don’t pull Daddy’s pants down in public.” for the 500th time

Jimin: I hope I never hit that dad phase where I think it’s a good idea to buy a minivan.

Taehyung: My son can now reach the light switches so don’t come over to our house unless you’re really into raves or want to have a seizure

Jungkook:

Child: What’s neglect mean?

Me: Shhh daddy’s playing video games

Band Kid Confessions #2

Junior, Guard

For indoor season we had a sad show, and a lot of the girls were having trouble performing, but I’m really good at it so they asked me how I always looked so sad and tearful when I performed, and I told them that I was in theatre so I’m good at expressing emotion. But it’s really just my face because I’m always scared when I do work.

me: *comes up with a half decent idea for a fanfiction*

*ten minutes later*

2017 colorguard mood: “Don’t spin like a little bitch.”

Story time #2

Junior, Guard

Once at a football game we were playing this school that had fans that were super disrespectful to our band and one of them shouted “our green is better than yours!”, which was probably supposed to be something really rude, but all I could think about after that was that our schools literally had the same color green.

please talk about what jane and max would be up to in those outfits

dyking it up! they are absolutely the tacky lesbians whose clothes are all thrifted and mismatched and three sizes off. they love the mall, because they get to people watch and get inspired for their next look. just window shopping there, mostly, unless a clearance item can be shoved in el’s baggy camo pants or max’s culotte pockets. they eat sundaes at ahoy’s, envious of steve’s hawaiian shirt, and sit outside the building bouncing rocks against the wall or doing skate tricks. and you know mi armario es tu armario, so they mix and swap each other’s pieces all the time

Me: man this next drill move looks really hard, I hope I don’t hit anyone!

Freshman trombone: *3 steps ahead of his line, about to run into me* oh how the turns have tabled