𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵…

i need to read 5 more books till the end of the year but i honestly can't decide what to pick next. i want to read slowburn but it's never done as i like in books and when i think of it, i realise that i don't even want to read romance. i can't decide on genre and on author and on anything at all because nothing just feels right for me. i want something poetic but it's hard to find poetry that would actually speak to me. i can't trust recommendations because it always feels off and i don't even trust people's opinions anymore. why is it so hard? why do i need to read a hundred books to find the one that would feel like it sees my soul?

i am a big believer in letting music (and other media) come to you when you're ready for it. you may only know vaguely of an acclaimed beloved artist and suspect that you'd be into them but just... not ever get around to it. and then in 15 years one of their songs just hits you the right way and what a gift to suddenly have all of their works to explore! there is no hurry; what is good is always good.

and maybe i am a little bit in love with all of my friends. how could i not be when they place their whole heart in my hands and trust me to carry it safely home? lazy days spent in comfortable silence, tearful nights spent giving each other a reason to live. the exhilaration of learning your little quirks melting into a future where i know you better than the lines on my open palms. mutual understanding to be forever gentle with one another. inside jokes that follow me long after you've gone, reminding me to slow down and laugh a little more. your eyes are the lens through which i can see the world with love. your embrace is the shelter under which i find strength to continue on.

when hozier said “and the nights were as dark as my baby half as beautiful too” and no grave can hold my body down i’ll crawl home to her” and “every word i’ve got is foreign to me” and “when you kill the lights and kiss my eyes i feel like a person for a moment of my life” and “i slithered here from eden just to sit outside your door” and “love with every stranger the stranger the better” and “don’t be kind to me honey don’t feed me i will come back” and “i wouldn’t fall for someone i thought couldn’t misbehave” and we let him get away with it?

youtube.com/watch?v=tc-jMrxgPsw&t=47s

DEAD POETS SOCIETY dir. Peter Weir

simran, full of emptiness

"fuck you my child is completely fine"

your child reads classic literature for fun

the word lover is so infinitely soft. So universal. So timeless. Two girls with awkward, hungry hands. A boy and a girl in the dark. Two men in empty light. A marriage of 40 years. Letters over eons. Sappho’s poems. The corner of a mouth. Lovers, lovers, lovers.

A Beautiful Red Flower ~ Karolina Grabowski