୨୧ Dear Diary #3: Ways I Want To Become Physically Healthy According To Islam ୨୧

i don't know who needs to hear this, but guilt, self-hatred and shame are not sustainable sources of growth and healing. you can't hate yourself into feeling better, or being better. you can't repeatedly punish yourself for your flawed humanity and expect wholesome results.

Any advice for sister's struggling with hijab/ pardah/ body image ?

Assalamualaikum🤍,

Jazakallah khair, Thanks for considering me to answer this.

First of all you wanting to take hijab, do pardah is a blessing and guidance from Allah swt so you have to believe that he has chosen you to represent his deen.

Few tips I can give from my journey are:

To study the lives of great women of Islam, and how haya (modesty) was such an important part of their lives.

Make an intention to seek Allah swt's pleasure from this act (and everything besides this in sha Allah)

1 step at a time, don't scare yourself. Start to cover up in ways you are comfortable with then ask Allah swt for help. But begin with the intention to obey Allah's commandments in its true from. (We see alot of women turning hijab into fashion). Know that it's an obligation and we will be rewarded for this.

Don't look at other girls, wallahi what you are in the eyes of Allah matters the most. The trends and standards of this world keep changing.

Make peace with the fact that our beauty and our being is reserved for the man Allah swt has written us and it has to be the best feeling that only those chosen eyes can see your beauty.

And last but most important, hijab doesn't only mean covering yourself, its also lowering your gaze from forbidden things, its also purification of your tongue, what you say and what you do not say.

I will ask Allah for ease for you and all my sisters who are struggling with hijab and pardah. In sha Allah🤍

♡Remember Our aim is the pleasure of Allah swt not this dunya.♡

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Lately I've been thinking about body image and how I should be perceiving myself as a Muslim woman.

For as long as I can remember, I've struggled with my weight and finding clothes that are modest and fitting, and I know we all grew up comparing ourselves to other girls and maybe even actresses and models that appeared in advertisements and on television. I also grew up in a time when there was no such thing as "plus size clothing" or "modest clothing". The Western clothing brands we had didn't offer a wide range of sizes and lengths for the Muslim girl who maybe doesn't exactly want to wear skintight jeans or spaghetti straps.

As I grew up with my eyes glued to the media, and with less-than-kind comments about my body really hitting it home that I was gross and unacceptable, and then with the multiple failed diets I went on from the age of 11 or 12, things started to look hopeless for me. So I did what girls on the internet were doing: not eat at all.

Obviously, that didn't work. The act itself only lasted for a few weeks at a time, with my weight dropping then skyrocketing when I couldn't do it anymore.

But the mental impact of all these years piled up is something I'm still struggling with as an adult.

Now, in my twenties, I'm trying to remind myself how a Muslim should treat his/her body. I'm trying to remind myself of all the Hadiths we learned about how, when, and how much a Muslim should eat. How a Muslim doesn't dress to show off certain "assets" and hide "flaws" in their body, but simply to be modest and humble. How every part of our body is going to speak on the Day of Judgement. How we don't live to eat but eat to live. How our bodies don't belong to us and we'll be asked what we did with them.

I'm trying to remind myself that there's more to my body than how it looks. That I should be more concerned with keeping it healthy because it was entrusted to me by Allah, rather than abusing it and making it ill.

This life is a test, and for me, my body and my health are a test too.

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