I Think I Like Women But Also I Like Men But I Don't Really Want Engage In Amorous Congress With A Lady

I have decided to never go out again I was at my friend's house and I got lost trying to get there and then I was really awkward while trying to help set up her online classes and eventually she handed me my jacket because she had to get dressed to see a movie and I want to curl up in bed she was literally so nice though we were talking about atsushi and akutagawa mimicking each other in the like death things?? after we sorted out her computer

I need to stop flirting with my friend oh my

She's giving me standards that I'm afraid no-one else shall fulfil and I

What do I do help me help me

Our texts are so unhinged but I

I don't think it's a joke anymore

Ffffuuuuccckkkk

Said in a singsong voice

In this world, nobody has your back. As i have discovered today, they shall not tell you things, despite having known each other your whole life.

(Nobody told me I was saying "narrating" wrong)

(I've been saying narra-rating and nobody corrected me)

I got hot water directly from the tap in my eye it burs so much

and now I'm sat in my bathroom crying via candle light oh my

Walked into my mom in the hallway and I just

"Where did you come from??? ...where did you go? ....

Where did you come from, cotton-eyed joe?"

Talking about fanfiction with my group chat and everytime they ask what my favourite fanfics for certain ships are I just have to deflect the conversation because my favourite fics just so happen to be written in october and they don't want to match my freak (the freaky little guys make me cry over them for 30+ chapters)

I need to put a shelf up on my wall but for now the only part of my bookshelf with enough space for my picture frame is subsequently also the one where I have all my 'children's books' so you can bet your socks that there is now hatsune miku fanart next to my collection of horrible histories

Wife is crying because I told her I just want her to be happy with life regardless of whether that's married to me in the future, or if she marries a man and I must remain her friend for eternity as long as she's content. WHAT DO I DO???? I DONR WANT HER CRYING??? HELP???

The urge to talk with, like, a really victorian sounding vocabulary, and the desire to talk exclusively with um modern?? terms are both within me and they're fighting with swords right now. Most of the time this results in me sounding like a vampire who's been alive since the 1800's and eventually stopped trying to sort out the current slang and now says stuff like "you engaged in amorous congress, my dear bro? That's utterly awesome sauce!" Via text and I think I have to accept that

If/when I finally get around to buying cosplay I NEED to aquire a chuuya one not just because he's an awesome character (which, admittedly, is one of the reasons) but my farmer ahh has sheep and I fear it'd be quite the nice little thing to cosplay him and take a picture with my orphan lamb