Am I Supposed To Be Grateful Or Not ?

WhO wiLL WiN??

Toxin vs Virus

Who do you think will win?

I tried tried and tried. In the end i gave up. This's why i'm always ending up hating myself.

My Dream On 1st July 2019 😜

I had a dream today and in the dream i had a boyfriend 😂😂 I dont really have a boyfriend in my real life but i had one in that dream 😂 He and me was going to go out. So he decided to borrow a rental bicycle to take me around the place to visit them. I was the one have to fill up the form first. I asked him if is it okay to choose the starting and returning point at the same place we filled up the form, he said that would be expensive. That rental shop also provided the service where they send and take the rental bicycle from the place we chose. He asked me to wait for a while and went somewhere. After sometime he came back and tell me a place's name. I wasnt sure about the spelling so i handed him the pen and asked him to write. He took over the pen from me and filled up the rest of the form. He was wearing a grey shirt and if i'm not wrong a grey shirt with a white dhoti. I cant clearly remember him now. But, it felt real. Everytime when he crossed by me, i could felt his smell. It was so real. Really real. I've never imagined before that i'll have such dream. Why did I had such dream ?? Why do i have to meet a guy who said to be my boyfriend when i dont have one in my real life ?? It was so confusing yet a different feeling. Oh yeah. In the end we visited all around the city and he safely returned the bicycle. I asked him if he has returned it safely and he nodded yes. I dont remember what city it is or where the places we went. But i do remember sitting in between his hands at the front while the was riding it. Then, in the last i said goodbye to him smilely and thanked him for the day. We went in different ways. My sleep was over. And That' THE END.

No matter how busy or how much rush you're in take some time to stop and look up to the sky. The endless sky filled with clouds in the daytime and twinkling stars at nighttime will tell you there's no limit in this world as long as you don't limit yourself in a fixed box 🙂

There were days while I was in matriculation that I never wish to go back to again. But now it feels like those days are repeating. But now, the only difference is that I'm not crying every day.

I want both

When I was there today, standing along the shore and doing sampling, I didn't wanted to leave the ocean. I was standing inside the water a bit farther from the shore but not that much. When i turned around and look at the vast ocean, it looked beautiful. The weather was also perfect today, neither too sunny nor cloudy at all. And the timing was also perfect. The chill and waves that were hitting my legs, I didn't wanted to move away from it. Even a step. That's when I thought of it. That I want my future self to do this too. Of course, I want to do laboratory work. I have imagined myself working in a laboratory environment countless times. I have no doubt in that. But after today, it made me realize that I want both. I do want to work in a laboratory but don't want to do it all the times. I also want to come out and work in the field. Meet small to big creatures to see what they're up to and let the wind pass through me. Get myself wet from playing/working in the ocean and get myself tired by fighting the waves just so I can have a good night's sleep. When my tired self comes home, I want to give myself a hot shower and full filling meal and then blop! I want to drop myself on my bed and sleep with no alarm set. Then, once I'm awake, I want to go the laboratory and take a closer look at the new creatures I found. That is how I would like to live. I don't want to spend the whole time stuck in the laboratory. Neither do I want to spend my whole time in the field. I want to do a job which balances both. I want to find pleasure by doing both. At least, that's what I believe.

There are some shots from today!! 💙

Also they was something about the ocean that made me feel weird. Made me feel somehow dizzy. I felt like floating. Today was the first time I'm stepping and standing in the ocean (minusing the time we did sampling for Dr. Mel's fieldwork session) after my diving practice. It somehow felt weird and calming at the same time.

My life in KMM in short. But i'll never stop running towards my goals no matter how thorny the part is 💪🔥

I always wants to be a part of them. But in the end, I only able to look from a far. It's starting to get annoyed with this way

It's a great feeling of untangling the earphone 🎶