Yes, But I’m Trying To Learn To Not Give A Shit About What Other People Think..

After figuring out that I most likely have autism, reading books on it, etc, my life has started to make so much sense. I was berated at a young age for being “weird,” a “freak,” smart but lazy, can’t understand spoken instructions, “a pleasure to have in class” but “needs to raise their hand more.”

Wish I knew earlier

the differences in tony and peter’s suits will always drive me insane.

Iron man is built to be big, bulky, loud and flashy. it’s got gadgets and gizmos and flies on its own. It’s a suit, but it really functions on its own as well. Even Rhodey in IM1 couldn’t guess there’s a person in it. It’s supposed to look like a robot. You’re not supposed to see the human. It’s a suit made to hide in.

the spider man suit is incredibly thin and hides nothing at all. You can see the person, the head is shaped like a head, there are fingers and it looks human. it is nothing without its pilot. you can hear his voice, unfiltered if he chooses. It’s made to make sure that the person inside is seen as a person. It’s not a disguise.

Peter used his vigilantism to express his humanity. Tony wears his suit when his humanity is too much for him to bear and he needs to hide from it.

Autism & Fluctuating Support Needs

Lil Penguin Studios/Autism Happy Place

I remember a while ago there were several metas talking about Bucky being right-handed (which he then confirms in TFATWS) while the Winter Soldier is left-handed, usually using this scene as proof:

And maybe even this:

But recently I saw several gif sets of Bucky on the train right before the fall (one of which I’ll reblog after this) and look:

He’s moving the gun between his left hand and right hand interchangeably, even when the right arm is not injured. In a later scene, he takes down the trooper with a single shot with left-handed aim — so he’s no slouch on that side. He then goes back to using his right hand when he picks up the shield.

On the converse, the Winter Soldier also uses his right hand and left hand interchangeably, notably in that scene:

In fact I think if you do an overall tally of how both Bucky and the Winter Soldier reach for their weapons — whether that’s a rocket launcher or a gun or knives — you’ll find that the majority of the time it’s in their right hand (just a quick GIF search would prove this). But the times they do use it in their left hand, they are still dangerously competent with it.

So I think Bucky (and the Winter Soldier) is right-hand dominant as he says, but he’s learned to use his left hand competently as a shooter before became the Winter Soldier. He’s then turned it into a useful skill to throw off his opponents.

Up until this point he’s been trying to stab Steve with his right hand, but Steve keeps blocking it with his shield. When Bucky drops the knife into his left hand, Steve’s attention follows the knife and Bucky instead uses his right hand to punch Steve in the head.

I think another part of the “Winter Soldier is left-handed” thought comes from the fact he often uses the left arm for brute force tasks - like ripping off doors from cars and helicopters, and punching into cement.

For most of us, our dominant hand is both the stronger and more dextrous hand, but for Bucky his right hand is more dextrous while his left arm is stronger (we’ll just accept the science of that for now…). So I feel like this is something that Bucky has learned to adapt — he uses that left arm for tasks that require the mechanical strength or as a metal shield, while the right is still his instinctive go-to for fine coordination tasks.

How, why, and when Bucky learned to be ambidextrous not just for firearms but also for hand to hand combat is a delicious source of angst worth exploring.

Also my memory sucks so if I don’t have it in writing to go back and look at, I will forget everything that’s been said

Thank you @ The Autistic Teacher

Me: “I can’t be autistic, I don’t have sensory issues.”

Also Me-

- The person who told me to try freezing grapes is my enemy.

- *Physically gagging from trying to eat a freeze dried strawberry*

- “I can’t sleep, my shirt is on.”

- This yogurt had pieces of fruit in it so I will let it spoil in the back of my fridge and die of starvation before I eat it.

- If anyone touches me right now I will become a safety hazard

- *Throwing myself off of furniture*

- Something is crinkling SOMEWHERE in the next room and if I don’t find it and destroy it I will never sleep again.

- This person’s headlights were too bright for 0.5 seconds and now I will have a migraine for the next 4 hours.

- My hands are wet MY HANDS ARE WET MAKE IT STOP

- What do you mean these clothes are dry? They’re clearly still damp, how do you not feel it? They’re still damp!

- These two rocks rubbed against each other and made a noise and I think I may have broken a tooth from clenching my jaw so hard

- If I am forced to wear jeans for more than 0.3 seconds upon entering my home I’m going to start crying

Feel free to add your own

SEBASTIAN STAN at Ghetto Film School in January 2023.

A commission that I’ve worked on a while back.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

This was the second image in the series of illustrations featuring Bucky Barnes as The Winter Soldier during the four seasons. Here he is in winter, cuddled up with some animals.

These paintings were super fun to work on and made me step out of my comfort zone a bit, because I don’t draw characters a lot.

Oh I’m so gonna do this with my brother

Does Steve’s kids have like 50% super soldier DNA?

Do they even know who their father really is?