This Just In:

Considering my irl name is already kind of oxymoronic at face value I could argue that I’m already there. (No you don’t get to know.)

if you were an ace attorney character what would your pun name be

Cackling over the fact that they’re fucking fighting over a species of horsetails, this is literally every botanist ever lmfao

i love it when botanists fight in the annotations

guy in 1939, taking his time to line up his typewriter to painstakingly write the family name: its equisetum hyemale!

guy in 1948 scribbling on a slip of paper: no dumbass its equisetum prealtium

guy in 2020 on a sticky note: hey fuckass! its equisetum hyemale, are you smoking crack? are you on fucking crack? update annotation.

no

I want to believe it can happen tho

I don’t mind the idea of him being demiro or demisexual at all, but I’m a bit biased I think /j

May 2025 bring upon the ace attorney fandom, a boom in aspec Phoenix art and fic.

Yes

The obligatory post

We await the return

He’s thawing…

Jokes on you, it’s a panic attack so mild you’re confusing it for chest cramps.

I now know how to describe my dog when he sprints inside the house because the grass is wet and he doesn’t like having wet feet

Ploop ploop ploop

I used to work as a cashier at a grocery store and literally had a middle aged lady go “you’re really good at organizing my groceries for me, other cashiers at the next store over don’t know how to do it the same way you do” (I could bag groceries and organize some of the self-brought trolleys that were full up in less than five minutes. The manager still wanted me to be somehow faster) and if that doesn’t sum up this entire post in one experience I don’t know what does.

Still got paid a “competitive” wage of the bare fucking minimum. Glad I left that place.

Worked there for two years and they treated me like shit for the majority of the time, and my labor skills weren’t even valued.

You can’t complain about a lack of skill due to high turnover rates and also claim said skills do not exist. Make it make sense.

Absolutely.

Your marriage premium package? Revoked. Sorry sir. The cunt counter is closed for the next four years. Should’ve voted for Harris.

Here’s an idea: Instead of just not having sex with them, you could just divorce or breakup with them and realize you are worthy of being in a relationship with someone who not only values your life, but also who has enough brain matter to prepare for the future, and not just vote on party lines like a stupid bastard.