The Transgenderfication Beam Hit The Second Tower Ft. Ooccoo Top Surgery

Fandoms are fucking wild because what do you mean I just stumbled upon a smutty as hell "shooting the United Healthcare CEO AU" fic??? That is a thing that just exists on the internet and was seen by my two eyes???

You know what, Link WOULD be a very good butt-scooter.

One of the most memorable dreams I ever had was when my family and I stopped at a hotel to spend the night on our trip to Kiawah Island. In the hotel room, I dreamt I was racing in Mario Kart 8 except everyone was not on karts and instead racing those nostalgic butt scooters from elementary school PE class.

For whatever reason I had this extreme rivalry with Link because Link was the absolute greatest butt scooter racer in all of Mario Kart. Link and I were half a lap ahead of everyone near the end of the race. I was frustrated but I tried my absolute best. When we were about to cross the finish line, I used up every last bit of energy I had and managed to beat Link. When I finished 1st, I yelled

“FUCK YES!”

so goddamn loudly that I ended up shouting it in real life, immediately waking everyone in my family up including myself. Everyone was wondering what the hell happened and I had to explain this very dream I just had to them.

y’all really recommend books like: title, there are gay characters, enemies to lovers, young adult, written by poc

not once do i ever see a summary

Sometimes, it's just you, your cat Faggot, and your horse My Shayla

You gotta make up some crazy lore to tell little kids about that scar, like say you fought a tiger or something-

Random lore: I wear the exact same sequined pink turtleneck every year on Valentine's Day. It is not comfortable in the slightest, but if I'm gonna be single, might as well get everyone's attention-

@gigglesum @ketchup-will-live-through-this @fall1ngawayfromm3

it's so weird to me that everyone on this website is a human person outside of their weird internet niche so rb this with a random bit of your lore

Elaborate, if you will-

Just realized the ultimate flex on the planet Arrakis would be a bowl of rice

Gonna start referring to periods like that

The Curse

Aka Hylia's favourite transmasc gets amnesia and forgets what periods are

PART TWO!

Who wants to go start an AI-free imperialistic society on a desert planet and get eaten by space worms with me?

me as a kid reading Dune: I appreciate the detailed world-building that justifies why everyone fights with swords and has mental powers, but the idea of a Butlerian Jihad against computers is pretty silly

me in 2025, trying desperately to find the three (3) places you need to go to to disable the latest helpful AI assistant that's inserted itself into my work chat and is advising me to do things that would be a breach of federal law: Oh Now I Get It

I think they should make that pre-storm smell into a drug and let me snort it. Or let me scatter it in the air around my neighbor's house and watch him go slowly insane as the sunny days smell like storms and also make him slightly high so he's wrong about the weather all the time

I spent a lot of time handcuffed and in a cage in high school, for a charity bit the grocery store I worked at would do

the bit was that I was "put in jail for having too big a heart" and customers could donate to my bail to get me out (and the money would go to a children's hospital or something)

now. I was very clearly a teenaged employee handcuffed inside a large cage. and I would honestly tell people that I had been in there for hours. and people would say, that's terrible! that's awful! and I would show them my wrists red from the tight handcuffs, and say but I'm sooooooo close to making bail.

and then they would dump some cash in the basket, I'd thank them, and they'd walk away.

and every so often, one of the managers would come by and collect some of the cash, so I could keep being soooooo close to making bail.

I was very good with this bit. Parents with small kids would pay $5-10 if I told their children I had been placed in jail for not cleaning my room/doing my homework, etc. For people in their 20s, I'd threaten that I was very bad at playing the harmonica, but I WOULD play it and we'd all suffer unless they paid me. and for the most amount of money, older men in suits would almost always pay $20s if I avoided eye contact and stammered a lot.

eventually, the managers started to feel bad because I was in the cage so fucking long and often, that I'd need someone to brace me when I got out because I'd have no feeling in my legs. wobbling like a newborn giraffe.

but I would also rake in at LEAST $100 an hour in charity.

so they were like, hey champ. can we, uh, give you a pillow to sit on. in the cage. would you like a pillow so you're not just sitting on a cold metal slab. can we give you a pillow.

and I had to explain to them that if they gave me a pillow, people would think I was more comfortable, so they wouldn't feel as bad, so I'd bring in less money.

the compromise was that they'd bring me a nice coffee every couple hours, which I would have to try to block with my body from the customers.

all this money went to charity. that's what the money was for. it's what was on the sign. but how much they were willing to pay was very contingent on how comfortable I looked, never mind the fact that I was still a teenaged employee handcuffed inside a cage.

and out of the dozens of shifts I did this on, not ONCE did ANYONE say, hey kid I'm going to go talk to your manager because what the fuck is going on here. they would just drop money in the basket, and I'd thank them and sip from my secret drink.

I actually had people get MAD at me that I told them I was far away from bail, they donated like $15, and then 20 minutes I got let out because my shift ended.

again. the money was for charity. it was on the sign that was very clearly placed on the upper half of my cage.

so yeah. even when people think they mean well. people can be really, really fucking stupid.