Bushido Blade 1 Story Mode

WLC 2.1: Licker Bar

Sitting in a tavern, a gecko in a ratty wig sits alone at a booth in the rear. Dressed in a red shawl and leggings, she swirls her drink while watching the crowd hounding the flame-haired bartender. He pours, shakes, and passes drinks in an effortless dance.

L: It was a few months after I moved here to Rankedge. I's at Libby's having a pint.

J: Of course, you were. You were always at Libby's. So glad that place burned down.

L: How can ya say that? Weren't ya friends with Jr.?

J: Yes, and she hated working there. She didn't want to be saddled by her dead dad's dream.

Her wandering gaze is suddenly pulled by the sound of the door. A knight in shiny armor steps inside, looking about. The gecko slips out of her seat and sneaks across the tavern.

L: She looked like a scaly elf. A real beauty, too: skin blue like lapis and hair of water. Too soft in the face and too fancy a suit to have seen much action.

Ignored by most of the drinkers, the knight makes her way to the bounty board and attempts to pin her own parchment to it. "Come on," she says, "Get in there you... tack."

L: Naturally, I had to take a chance.

D: Were you always looking to help people, Nana Ling?

L: Y-yeah, I'd been helping everyone and their mum.

"Problem, mate?" asks the gecko, taking the page, "Going questabout, eh?" Her eyes dart back and forth from it and it's poster.

"Yes," says the knight, annoyed by the audacity, "But I have need of a guide into the Underdank." She looks the gecko over. "Doubt you'd be of any help."

L: The undine was in pursuit of her missing "roommate" from St. Chastity's. And ya know how the girls from there are.

J: St. Chastity's School for Lady Paladins?

L: The very same. Never been a straight lady in that building.

"Well, ya'd be wrong," says the gecko, "Name's Dr. Ling, local wizard and probo'solver." She hand the page back. "If your mate's up a gumtree, I can help. Ya got a name, lovely?"

"Maraja," says the knight, placing her fist over her heart, "Champion of Vanessa."

J: Vanessa? Really?

D: Who's that? Do you know her too?

L: I'm getting to that. Hold on.

"Champion? Then why ya looking for aid in a pub?" asks Ling, "We got a shrine up the way." She tilts her head at Marja's continued distrust. "At least let me show ya that far."

Maraja sighs, "Sure then." She shoves her paper into her bag. "Lead the way."

Locking Swords

Blade clashes in Bushido Blade 2 are more interesting visually than the first game. The character who is winning actually pushes the loser around in a far more obvious way.

POV: You've locked blades with the leader of the enemy clan on a castle roof.

POV: You've locked blades with a shrine maiden on competition grounds.

POV: You're just gals being pals when she just lets you win.

The motion of actually flinging the loser is something I'm sad the sequel lost, but the clarity of who is winning is more important.

WLC 5.E: She Tangle with My Sheriff 'til I Pork

Jevoi leans on the railing, looking out on the endless sea of stars. As much as she needs that tome, her mind keeps wandering off. That demon has crawled into her mind like a weevil. Yesterday keeps playing in her mind.

"You're trickier than I thought," says Tanglepork, her gun pressed to Jevoi's back. "Hiring staff to humiliate me, didn't see that coming."

G: Ya're welcome.

"You can clearly see, I-"

"Shut up," growls the sheriff, jabbing her hostage with the gun's barrel, "Where is it?"

"With a horny sea hag," says Jevoi, "That coven's probably used it all already."

"Stop ly~ing~," sings Tanglepork, "If you don't have it, you know what ha~ppens~."

"Diablo mio," a voice rings out; it belongs to Angustias, who is slithering down the dock. "What are you doing?"

"Arresting a criminal," says the sheriff, flashing her badge, "Stay~ back~, de~mon~."

Angustias glares at the gnome. If she's going to do anything, she has to take initiative. She subtly coils her body. As fast as she can, Angustias conjures her six swords and leaps toward the gnome, swinging wildly. One sword cleaves off the gnome's gun' barrel. Another, the hand holding it. One slices open the back. Another, the belly. One stabs a knee from behind. The last, up the butt.

A: A rather unsatisfying fight, I'll admit. After that- J: She died on the spot. L: Is that so? D: That's how the mean sheriff died?

Tanglepork's screams are trapped in the unseen bubble surrounding the trio. For all Jevoi's dismissiveness and daughterly angst, she has learned some of her mother's spells. The sheriff uses her remaining hand to try to hold her organs in as she collapses to the floor.

"A lizard who's a wizard?" Angustias less asks and more blurts in confusion.

"No," says Jevoi over Tanglepork's softening sobbing, "I'm ...an eldritch... trickster?"

"Still sounds like a nerd," says Angustias, reaching down into Tanglepork and pulls an organ up, still attached to a tangling mess of the sheriff's "pork", so to speak. "Let's play a game, the first of you two that identifies each organ gets a point."

"Kidney," says Jevoi.

"Correct," says Angustias, crushing it.

"That's not fair," whimpers Tanglepork.

Angustias drops the kidney and pulls up another. "Liver," Tanglepork tries to yell.

"Yes." Angustias sets it back in. As she does, she notices Tanglepork attempting to wiggle something out of her vest pocket. The demon stabs another sword into the gnome, this time, in her shoulder. "I know your kind's tricks." Angustias tries to pull something else out of the gnome, but it's small and buried. "What's this little thing?"

"An ovary?" asks Jevoi, glancing around nervously. "You should stop before we get caught. Just kill her already."

POP-SQUISH

"Just one more," says Angustias, eyeing Jevoi with a mad fire in her eyes. "I'm finally getting why so many demons are into this." She pulls another organ up. "Besides, the gnome can't die from this."

"Please, don't crush my bladder," cries Tanglepork. She clinches her eyes and focuses on her magic. "Optica-"

Angustias punches Tanglepork in the jaw, the force cleaving the gnome's tongue off and shattering her teeth. "No spells!" She shoves the bladder back in.

Tanglepork attempts to speak, but the message is lost in the spray of blood.

Jevoi takes a step back. "I think your game's over, An-Angustias."

"Fine, it's a draw," whines Angustias, "Adios, p**a." She shoves the gnome's severed hand and gun into the open wound and flings her off the side of the ship.

Tanglepork slams into the magic sphere protecting the ship, her cracking against it, and slides down the side, leaving a bloody smear behind her.

Jevoi looks over the railing. "You really think she'll survive that?"

"Yeah," she says, "Gnome's can only die of boredom."

"That's not true," says Jevoi, turning toward Angustias, "That just how they die of age. They're still mortal. If you cut them, they still bleed."

"Oh," says the demon, now licking Tanglepork's fluids off the deck, "Eh."

Jevoi gawks at wild messy display and licks her own eyes.

A: Yes, she died immediately and we disposed of the body. J: Then we went back to Angustias' cabin. L: Yeah, here we go. J: Don't be weird, Mum. We just talked about- L: Then why ya telling me this? D: Did you ever get your book? J: Yes, after the cruise, we- L: One hook at a time. Next yarn: why I killed that old wolf. J: I suppose, you could entertain us over desert. Here comes the cake. D: Oooooooooooooooooooooo! Cake.

WLC 4.6: Tonight, We Dine, In Hall

The dining hall is a grand display: many lengthy tables, elaborate chandeliers, fancy crystal 'candles', and cushioned chairs. Jevoi sits at the head of the table with Angustias on her right. Dalini sits on the left with an unimpressed Ling beside her.

Ling looks down the table into the empty room. "Where's the rest of them?" she asked.

"We're eating earlier than usual," says Jevoi, "I don't want to overwhelm Dalini."

"Don't want to be seen with me," accuses Ling, "Or want my eyes on ya?"

Before Jevoi can respond, a chime rings out and four covered plates float to the table.

"Eh, what's this display for?" asks Ling, "Why not some bloke?"

Jevoi pauses, as if realizing something, but disregards it.

The group uncover their food: Angustias has massive steak, Jevoi and Dalini have fruit salads with snails, and Ling has a large insect.

"Dire roach!" says Ling, "Ripper, the lobster of land." She breaks off a leg and begins sucking the meat out.

Dalini begins scooping fruit into her mouth by hand.

"Use a spoon, please," says Jevoi, pointing to the by Dalini's bowl, "It's rude to use your hands like that, Dalini."

"Okay," says Dalini, picking up the spoon and carefully trying to pick up the pieces.

"The fork may be more useful," says Angustias, cutting up the meat before her.

As Dalini stabs a strawberry, she asks, "So how did you meet?"

Jevoi swallows a bite of food and coughs. "That's- that's a bit of a story."

"We got time, Jevoi," says Ling, cracking open the roach's carapace, "And we got a third witness here too."

Gank briefly flickers behind Jevoi with a malicious grin, as Jevoi sighs. "I suppose we shouldn't keep it a secret."

Was not expecting someone to draw a creature close to my heart as a heart.

🫀🦑

Thinking About Sin

I'm a big fan of combining the Orthodox eight deadly thoughts with the Catholic seven deadly sins: splitting sloth back into despair (tristitia) and apathy (acedia) [though I like to call this one sloth still], keeping envy, but ditching vainglory.

SLOTH and DESPAIR

While the end result of laziness and despair are effectively the same from the sinner side (you don't do things), the means of temptation are the exact opposite.

Contemplate what a being, say a demon, would be that invites you into sloth: a maid, the latest techno-fad, an overly doting parent. Someone who says, "Let me take care of that," which eventually mutates into a nasty little brain-imp whispering, "Let someone else take care of it." This obviously overlaps with several of the other sins.

Contrast despair, who is here to F*** YOU UP. It is here to break you with a never-ending torrent of misfortune, a constant parade of life kicking you in the teeth. This could also have the exact opposite effect, spurring someone into wrath.

The overlapping area would be someone claiming to protect you from the big scary world, but sloth says "Just don't look," while despair grabs you with both hand and slams your face into the worst of it. "Look at it! Look at this s***!"

In short, despair is clear counterpart to wrath (and both lead toward violence), but apathy/laziness feels disconnected from it and has more in common with pride and envy.

ENVY the Serpent's Glare

The sin of envy sits at the intersection of pride, wrath, and greed. This position, I feel, warrants its inclusion as a designation of category of sin; it's so common, that it seems more than just the sum of its parts, but a natural point. It's like the color green: once viewed as merely shades of blue, but it seems so obvious now that it never should have been. Some even claim envy is the deadliest of the sins, beating out even pride.

PRIDE, VAINGLORY, and VANITY the Devil's Three Heads

Vainglory and vanity just seem like archaic ideas; subdivisions of a theme that were rightfully reorganized. Boasting and self-obsession hardly feel out of place being dubbed pride and the means of temptation would be the same: just someone who's adhered their lips to your rear.

Having them separate seems as absurd to me as splitting gluttony into different sins. Though, I'm not a religious person, so my thoughts here are more narrative (fantasy writing, that is to say) than moral.

WLC 1.3: Say, "The Princess?"

The wizard's daughter loosened her posture as she stared into the dark backroom. "Please, come out here," she says, her eyes aglow.

At the sound of shuffling behind the wizard, the old gecko sighs, "Fine, do it."

A smaller gecko in a ragged brown dress scurries quickly next to, and hides behind, the wizard. "Nana Ling," she whispers, "Who is that?"

"Don't act like ya weren't listening," says the wizard Ling, her focus still on her own daughter.

Said daughter takes a few steps forward, around the fire, and leans down. "I'm Jevoi, your mother," she says, smiling for the first time in months. "What's your name?"

The little gecko leans out from behind Ling and looks at her nana. Upon seeing a faint nod, she says, "Dalini. My name's Dalini."

"Dalini," Jevoi repeats, "What a beautiful name: Princess Dalini." Dalini tilts her head in confusion. In response, Jevoi stands tall again. "That's right," she says, "I am the Dead Sun Empress, ruler of the Inner Dark." She pauses, looking over her little doppelganger. "And that makes you-"

Ling scoffs. "Still trying to rename Inner Glow?"

"It hasn't glowed in eight years, Mum," says Jevoi, her eyes darting to the wizard's bone-infused hat rim which masks her.

"And whose fault is that, Jevoi?" asks Ling, leaning back so that Jevoi could see her face again, the face they share.

Look at this happy little thing.

wizard lizard

Mr. Gamma ready to rock this world.

Mario Kart World Waluigi 🌹💜

WLC 2.6: A Whole Lot of Hole

Down into the darkness the party did travel, climbing down by hand. One of Kalyani's staves carried a spell that allowed Maraja to imitate Ling's natural climbing.

"Do you really do thhiss every week?" asks Kalyani, carrying her entire weight on her hands alone, "Care to ssay why, dear?"

"Plant research," says Ling, climbing slow enough to keep pace while also carrying the priestess' bag, "I'm experimenting with biolumies in the Cave."

"Bio loomies?" asks Kalyani.

"Rocks and shrooms that glow down there," says Ling, "Trying to find a way to farm in the dark."

"For what purposse?" asks Kalyani, "The food crississ issn't from lack of light."

J: It is odd that you started there. L: Well, it's all I could afford at the time.

"If food can grow in the Caves," answers Ling, "That's a reason to get those b*****ds down there to stop raiding other parts of the Glow."

"Iss thhat why you moved here?" asks Kalyani, "And from where?"

"From Ozzel," says Ling, "Went to Lemonbum's Wiz School. Thought my accent would make it obvy. Where ya from, Sister? Ya don't sound local either."

"Her eyess led me here from thhe cloudss of Shheshhaparvata," says Kalyani, her voice more melodic, "Every few yearss, I-"

"CAN YOU STOP TALKING?" shouts Maraja, whose descent was far more cautious, "HOW ARE YOU SO CALM?"

"Breathhe, dear," says Kalyani, "Move one limb at a time."

The light from above suddenly ceases to be; Bobbobo had closed the dome.

"THE OPENING CLOSED," yells Maraja, her voice cracking, "I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING!"

J: Why didn't you have any light with you? L: Ya think seeing how far down it was would help? Or seeing the light be swallowed by the abyss? The temptation of looking down would've killed her. J: Point taken.

"Mate, panicking is just making ya slower," says Ling, "Which means ya're up here longer. I'd be bottomside already if I weren't watching ya. Remember why ya're here."

"I'M TRYING!" screams Maraja, "WHAT IF WE FALL?"

"Then I'll jump after ya," says Ling, "I'm a wizard; I've a spell to save ya."

"WHY NOT USE IT NOW!?"

"If I use it too soon, it won't work."

"Remember, what shhe ssaid yessterday," says Kalyani, "Disstractsion. Tell uss more about thhiss lady we're following."

"Okay, okay," says Maraja, trying to calm her breath, "I can... do that."