CONSIDER

CONSIDER

(I’m assuming this was made before Shotaro and Sungchan joined, so I’ll add them to houses 5 and 3 respectively)

House 1: Taeyong, Ten, Jungwoo, and they’re all giving the silent treatment

Pros:

- you can basically do whatever you want if they aren’t talking to you

- you’ve got Taeyong so the house will be nice and clean, and you can experience his holy cooking

- Taeyong and Ten mean you’ll have fish and cats to hang out with

- it’s never a boring day when Ten and Jungwoo, NCT’s confident gays, are in the same room

- imagine the gossip between these three that you can just listen in on

Cons:

- not bad for you, per se, but Louis and Leon mean those fish might not last too long

- Jungwoo’s probably gonna have a weird ass sleeping setup with the members like his current room with Jaehyun. Again not really bad, just weird.

- you can’t talk to them because they’re giving you the silent treatment

- no fruit if Ten’s there

Loophole: it wasn’t specified how long they’d be giving you the silent treatment for

House 2: Kun, Hendery, Jaemin, but you can only communicate by shouting as loud as you can

Pros:

- pure chaos

- Kun can cook and keep people alive; Hendery and Jaemin cannot

- waking up early won’t be a problem because you won’t be sleeping in the first place

- you finally have a good reason to buy those nice sound cancelling headphones you wanted

Cons:

- pure chaos

- I’ll give it three days for Kun to completely go insane

- between Hendery’s chaotic self and Jaemin’s espresso shots nobody’s getting any sleep ever

- those sound cancelling headphones won’t even work though because MinDery are too loud

Loophole: ha good luck there isn’t one

House 3: Doyoung, WinWin, Jeno, Sungchan, but the smoke alarm is on low battery and is beeping the whole time

Pros:

- seukka seukka

- Doyoung can keep the house clean

- WinWin would probably do chores out of boredom too

- Jeno will probably make beeping noises right with the smoke alarm, so at least it’ll be funny

- Sungchan can experience firsthand Doyoung’s wrath. Wait... is this a pro or a con??

Cons:

- until you’ve been kept up at night by a chirping smoke alarm, you have not felt true pain and suffering

- WinWin will probably cut all his hair off by the time quarantine is over. He’s barely got any sanity left please let him keep the crumbs he still has

- Doyoung may keep the house clean but he gets angry

- Sungchan’s tall enough to fix the alarm but bold of you to assume he knows how

Loophole: gl

House 4: Taeil, Lucas, Xiaojun, Chenle, but the only food is plain toast

Pros:

- Lucas came up with the idea of having different varieties of drinks to replace to blandness of having plain toast everyday

- Taeil, Chenle and Lucas are total party animals so no day would be boring

- Xiaojun and Chenle means you get Bella and Daegal too

- since you can only eat toast, Xiaojun can’t make his questionable oreo microwave cake

Cons:

- Chenle’s gonna lose it and cut Daegal’s hair again, save her

- Bella better watch out in case Chenle comes for her next

- Chef Moon Taeil is quaking because all they can eat is toast

- You just can’t let Haechan know you were spending time with Daegal because he will end you

- the house will probably be a mess since Taeil is part of the 10th floor and Xiaojun and Lucas are part of the WayV dorms. And Chenle

- Bella’s gonna pee on the floor again and Xiaojun will have had enough at that point and leave the house to go join the goose mafia

Loophole: the toast has to be plain, which I’d assume means you can’t have anything on it. Nothing mentions the kind of toast. You got wheat toast, white toast, rye toast, etc.

House 5: Yuta, Mark, Renjun, Jisung, Shotaro, but the house is super haunted

Pros:

- Mark freestyle rapping while everyone else is screaming and getting chased around by evil spirits

- Yuta would tell scary ghost stories to freak everyone out but you’d probably cackle at Mark’s scared face. “I- I’m not scared, dude. Nah, yo”

- Taro’s safe because nobody can get angry at his cuteness and he’s too pure to be haunted by anything. The spirits love him

- Mark and Jisung are banned from the kitchen, so no house fires unless Renjun snaps

- Yuta’s just vibing and here for the ride honestly

Cons:

- Who tf was cruel enough to put Jisung in the haunted house group?? Boy gets scared so easily

- Renjun would realize the house is haunted and be like “please take them”

- if he doesn’t kill the other members himself out of rage

- honestly you’ll walk into the living room to catch him sitting by a pentagram and candles with Jisung as a sacrifice

Loophole: hehe good luck :)

House 6: Johnny, Jaehyun, Haechan, YangYang, but there’s no internet/tv/video games

Pros:

- Johnny’s jokes

- experience Jaehyun’s unbothered (• ◡ •) ?? look in all its glory

- Johnny, YangYang and Haechan could be screaming at the top of their lungs meanwhile Jaehyun’s just looking into some imaginary camera like he’s on the office, mentally sipping a margarita thousands of miles away on some tropical beach and you will laugh your ass off

- just lots of laughs and probably pranks

Cons:

- could Haechan and YangYang actually survive that long without internet?? Nah

- I mean they could but it would be at the expense of everyone else’s safety and sanity

- pretty sure these four could be considered a frat

- have fun being trapped in a house with four bored extroverts for who knows how long

- you’ll slowly go insane

Loophole: no video games? Play monopoly and watch Jaehyun’s competitive ego crumble as Haechan takes control of half the board

I’d probably choose house 1, 2, or 6. 1 because my ult bias is there, and so are his cats, and cats bring serotonin. 2 because who needs sleep when you have fun, screaming and coffee?? 6 because come on. Those four members stuck in a house with no internet has some comedic possibilities.