Boxhoy - Box

“don’t worry guys!! i’m just doing surveillance so there’s no bad things up ahead— no it’s okay you don’t need to follow me!! don’t follow me! matteo stop. leave me alone!! okay guys i’ll lied see you at the end lol!!!! see you at il lombardia!!!”

🧡

Remco Evenepoel & Wout van Aert🇧🇪 Photoshoot - UCI Road World Championships 2022 📸 by Tim de Waele/Getty Images

WAIT BESTIE IS THAT YOU (ps: I'm StuckyTsukichan on Ao3)

IT IS ME HOW ARE TOU DOING???

etho’s return to hermitcraft cured everything wrong with me, saved my really bad aplang average, and gave me a cookie

him and iskall’s relationship, THEY APPARENTLY ARE ON SO MUCH YET DON’T SEE EACH OTHER?? chef’s kiss. the board of signs with messages to each other? i’m on my hands and knees. his shopping spree and pointing out iskall’s messes and then complimenting his terraforming? crying.

etho’s collecting platonic husbands like pokémon cards and y’know what? good for him

i need to adopt and provide health insurance to my mutuals live-blogging with me please

damn,,, i wonder who they’re gossiping about

moon big is NOT etho’s problem.

if etho just wants to buy out people’s entire stock and carry ginormous shopping bags around the island, then good for him. if etho wants to build funny farms that serve relatively no purpose but to make iskall go “ooh what’s this”, then good for him. if etho wants to be a self-made sugar baby boss with hot red plastic sunglasses with the price tag still on them, then good for him.

i support him 100%

“did you see me. did you see me behind you in front of you always there on your wheel. i was there. always there. congrats on bronze it belonged to me. why did you hug tadej like that are you replacing me. can you fucking hold my hand. can you touch me with the camera in front of you. can you do that please. can you please. stop staring at tadej.”

ggwp milo🫶🫶 you deserved that sparkly cape for sure. always feel free to reach out to me and talk cycling anytime :)

cycling fic rec list

basically everyone can ignore this, but as someone who got hyperfixated on professional cycling (even if I cannot ride a bike) and is now competing in cycling fanfic events, and I have just done an event for one of the 3 biggest races.

@wtfanworkclassification organised this amazing event, so massive thank you to them, so I thought i'd recommend some of the awesome fics (some stages are missing, which are the ones where I wanted to rec myself haha :)

stage 2 - magic au

“Nature” decided

Wout and Mathieu are stuck together. literally.

General

Mathieu/Wout, background tadej/jonas

I decided magic doesn’t work on jonas

1/1 - 503

stage 4 - mutual pining

E stands for… evenepoel

wout/remco

“I was just talking to Julian.”

“Remco.” Wout is not sure if he should laugh or be concerned.

“Hm?”

“Your screen. It’s turned off.”

Wout and Remco go to a rave. E stands for ecstasy Evenepoel

Mature

wout/remco

Fluff

1/1 - 1317

stage 6 - accidental baby acquisition

A nature break with a purpose

Edo & Wout

“Edo, what is this?”

A pudgy hand reached out and Wout smiled, cheeks and the corners of his eyes crinkling in brief adoration. “Hello, little one,” he cooed, reaching out his own hand and letting the infant grab onto his pointer finger with her whole hand

[or, Edo and Wout (and the adjacent rest of VLAB) become fathers. For VAEFC2024]

General

Edo & Wout

Accidental Baby Acquisition

1/1 - 1165

stage 8 - guilt

You are lucky you’re my boufriend

sepp/adam

I thought I was getting better

But Visma doesn’t want me at half health and I get that

But are you getting better

I don’t know

[or, the lieutenant boyfriends text throughout the length of the 2024 Tour de France. For VAEFC2024]

General

sepp/adam

Texting

1/1 - 900

stage 9 - 5 things

It only counts in Paris

tadej/jonas

Him, below on the cooldown bike, legs gelatin and Jonas, above on his muscular thighs, powerful calves, still smiling so modestly. He looked like an angel. Tadej wanted to devour him like the devil, leaving only the yellow behind for the taking.

[or, five times Tadej finished in the winner’s room and the one time he brought his victory to his own room. FOR VAEFC2024]

Mature

tadej/jonas

Tour de France

1/1 - 2053

stage 10 - accidental marriage

What happens in Monaco never stays in Monaco

wout/jonas, remco/mathieu

Remco smiled out of confusion, throwing up his hands. “Who? Was it, I don’t know, Wout Van Aert? Another cyclocrosser? Even fucking-”

His jaw set at Mathieu’s guilty expression. “You are married to Wout van Aert. The Wout van Aert.”

[or, Wout and Mathieu have to come clean to their boyfriends. For VAEFC2024.] 

Teen

wout/jonas, remco/mathieu

I can’t be mean to them

1/1 - 1469

stage 11 - patience

The wait/weight of a dying man

Sepp & primoz

“Go race Ben. Have some patience.”

“I-” Primoz went to retort, but nothing came out. He has had too much patience for one man to bear.

[or, Primoz can’t wait on himself much longer. For VAEFC2024.]

Teen

Sepp & primoz

Waiting

1/1 - 1320

stage 12 - take your fandom to work au

I hope this email finds you well

tadej/jonas

Get a glimpse into the daily life of TDF’s Slovenia based, busy as a bee Administrative HR team!

“Hello, subhuman resources, Jasper speaking”

Tadej wants to say hi but only manages to cough, right after his mic connects,

“Hey, uh. Sorry.”

“Lovesick much today?”

Not rated

tadej/jonas

Alternate universe - office

1/1 - 1543

stage 16 - huddling for warmth

Cervelo versus colnago

sepp/adam

He realised it was just Sepp, standing ominously in the doorway. “What do you want now?” He asked, swiping to another reel.

“It’s cold.”

“Thanks for the revelation,” Adam grunted.

[or, Jonas and Tadej set up their lieutenants, but things don’t go to plan when a snowstorm comes through. For VAEFC2024.]

Teen

sepp/adam

1/1 - 1798

stage 18 - escape

“I’ll leave a light on”

wout/mathieu

!!! detailed mentions of Wout’s crash in DDV + a lot of angst in general !!!

When Wout falls in DDV, Mathieu begins to understand how important Wout really is to him. In the Vuelta, he is there when Wout needs him the most.

“I will keep you safe, you hear me, I will go to fucking Lourdes if I have to. But you will be fucking safe.” he whispers more to any fate-related entity than to Wout.

Really a fic to try and comfort myself, but also for everyone out there who needs it.

Not rated

wout/mathieu

1/1 - 2550