Ha, One More Piece, And Then I'll Sleep

Workin on my anxiety by adding more to this account thingamajig 👍

My country is failing apart, but damnit, I am going to keep improving

Alright, alright, I said I'd post more art stuff

I woke up in the middle of the night and had this design in mind. I can see though, now that I've sketched it out, it's a lot of little pieces of other character designs I like, so I probably won't use it for anything. The character's name is Quillan tho

Finally bit the bullet and actually downloaded Tumblr- yay! Hoping this will encourage me to post more art, because it honestly gives me a dopamine hit, even with the little bit of attention it gets

Imagine having been born in 1905... And all your life it doesn't fucking stop. The Great War, the Spanish Flu, and then you go out of your mind for 7 years. Everyone is traumatised and nothing matters. Then another crash. And then the rise of fascism, and the War to end all Wars didn't and it's 1945 and you're just about still there. You may have fought or ferried the boys from Dunkirk or sabotaged the Nazi occupiers or worked in the factories and put out fires during the Blitz and you're lucky to be alive, because not all your friends made it. But you are and finally, fucking finally, it stops. It stops. You are tough as nails and you can put that strength to work into building something and you do, and people have cars and can buy icecream and you have a pension fund and the kids have money of their own and no nightmares.

I want that for us. I so want that for us. I want to be the generation that has seen fucking everything and is like a MRSA bug and unfazed and when that Cheeto finally dies, I want us to. Plant the gardens and clean the seas because we can and we want to and we remember some joy, some time of trust even when it got broken and we can say to the 20 somethings "let us show you what we can build, how it can feel."

And maybe Gen beta will take it all for granted like the boomers did, but we can give Gen Z and Alpha some peace because we, and Gen Z and Alpha have seen the Dark Times and fuck that noise.

Uuuugh mental health and healing is difficult because you gotta but mental energy into, and that's conscious, whilst physical healing requires physical energy, which you don't have to focus on or put effort into, cuz it's subconscious and your body puts forth the energy for you.

This does mean we gotta scold ourselves when we have icky thoughts or are overly anxious and it's haaaarrdd

Imma try noting and posting more stuff as a sort of rejection therapy thing, idk, I've got some art on here now and it's terrifying and I think that'll eventually be good for me

Okay, so, I'm not very religious anymore due to a terrible childhood, but I miss singing hymns.

A group of people coming together to sing of hope and faith. There's something about that I think we all need more of nowadays, whether in a worshipping sense or not.

Ight, imma try to make these little post of mine more productive. I think trying to write something more positive/hopeful/soothing might help my mental health

AH ANXIETY WHY DID I POST ANYTHING EVER AHHHH

I miss being in love with life.

But just because I'm not right now doesn't mean I can't be one day.

I have to believe I'll get there one day.

I can't wait to be in a place in Life again where I can be openly kind to people again

I love you all, you're just also scary sometimes