Shoulders Are Built For Sinking Your Teeth Into

Music and How It Makes Me Feel

I've been feeling out of sorts today and found myself gravitating to an album I haven't listened to since I was in secondary school. I have absolutely overplayed it though, so could only really stand 1 listen through ( and even then,I skipped the most popular of the promotional singles).

It did get me thinking about my relationship to music and to this album, however, and I've come to realise that; I have regressed in my emotional fluency, my ability to parse my emotions and to verbalise them - which is tragic because its kinda my thing; and that I relied heavily on music to communicate and my feelings in secondary school and I have lost some of that due to my listening choices of late.

I will definitely be exploring both these threads on here and in private but it's definitely jarring to realise that no matter how much I think I've improved in my emotional regulation, processing and communication, I've somehow regressed in a major contributor to my understanding of self and area of self expression.

I am going through a transitionary period in life and these thoughts are definitely common to me in times like this, and more albums from my last major transition period - graduating from secondary school, moving to a different country, beginning tertiary education - will definitely pop up in my spotify que. Hopefully I come out of this period in my life with renewed interest in musci as a medium of self exploration and that I don't accidentally trigger myself by listening to anything with strong ties to people I dont talk to anymore.

Bateman Begins, A Nathan Bateman Batman AU

And then there was that time I accidentally started a Nathan Bateman Batman AU These are structured as headcanons Pairing: Nathan Bateman x Reader

Rating: M

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven Part Eight Part Nine Part Ten

(More parts beneath the cut!)

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Superman desperately scanning the street during a fight to find the most morally acceptable car to throw at his opponent, knowing that not everybody has insurance, and loss of transportation can ruin a life -

A wave of incredible relief washes over him as he spots the hard geometric lines and silver paintless sheen of a Cybertruck.

annie appreciation post✨

Also something I’ve had on my mind for a while is the idea of Pope finding love while he’s in jail. Like maybe he gets into a fight with another inmate or guard and he’s sent to see the medic at the jail and she’s this super cute gal who’s just so nice and gentle with him and he can’t help but do something everytime he knows she’s gonna be working just so he can be taken to go see her. OMG sometimes I let my mind wander and add some more details to it and like imagine she was like his childhood neighbor that he had a crush on but moved away and now she’s like an emergency medicine PA or nurse and she only works at the jail like once a month for some extra cash while she’s trying to pay off student loans or something and he’d def make some sort of anonymous donation or something to pay off her school. Idk just a cute idea that I love for him.

this is such an incredible idea!!! childhood neighbor reader who used to patch up pope after he got roughed up by the bullies at school and then eventually tussles with his brothers and the jobs that smurf made them do. he would sneak out and meet you by your fence and maybe you had parents who did not want you talking with those cody boys and their crazy mom so you just patch him up using the light from the moon and the christmas lights your parents never took down. bring a flashlight incase it's really bad and you need to stitch him up. maybe he brings you tiny things from their jobs—a bracelet here and a pretty necklace there. and then you leave for school years later and it's like, of course, he always knew you were smart and he thinks you'll be a great nurse and maybe on your last day he comes to say goodbye at your fence and you tell him how he was your first patient and ..... sappy sad goodbye. maybe you come back for breaks but he's not there all the time and your parents downsize and move away or pass and you finish school and start working. maybe he hears from smurf about how that neighbor girl just graduated and he thinks it's a test, like if he does something and sends you flowers or goes to visit you smurf will know what he felt towards you and could use you against him and he definitely can't have that. at the very least he needs to protect you the way you helped him for so many years. so he doesn't do anything.

and you, well it's not easy making an honest living. folsom is very far from oceanside but maybe you live in between or maybe not. but there's extra money for those willing to work a weekend shift in the prison ward. it's just helping the doctor patch up and the guards never leave your sight so it's not really even that dangerous. so you do it every once in a while and maybe andrew hears whispers about the pretty nurse in the infirmary and maybe some jokes about hurting themselves to go have a look. but then he actually does get hurt, by accident, and has to go down there and it's just very. oh. it's you. it's always been you!!! still wearing the jewelry he gave you years and years ago. maybe while you're patching him you make a joke about how it's so much easier with light and how it's just like old times. and then maybe you go one step further and go visit him during your breaks like using his visitation hours. and maybe it goes on like that for a while and he tells you that you really shouldn't be doing this job because it's not safe and he doesn't want to tell you what he's heard but he really doesn't want you here. and you tell him you have a lot of loans and your parents didn't leave you much and you can't just leave but. you know what i bet he'd say he'll take care of it when he gets released if you'll just please stop working here. and maybe stupidly you listen because you've always believed and trusted him. just very. shows up on your doorstep a little bit after he's released with a letter saying your loans are paid off and asks if he can actually come inside now and just :-) im emotional

i got my hair retightened today and it always feels like i got scalped. now i won't get home till 5am tomorrow and i don't have any ibuprofen 😭

Some of my favorites of the night …. I love black women

my husband is so cutieful

Sam Wilson's Smile 🥰

Decided to finally watch prospect, but i can only find it on tubi with no subtitles 😔

Productivity Log #1

I actually did something productive today 😁😁. I cleaned my room. It’[s not much, since I dint make my bed or anything but i swept my room and my bathroom, scrubbed my shower, toilet and sink and mopped the floors. It took a lot longer than I thought it would, since its been a while since I’ve cleaned anything really. 

It felt good to do something other than watch youtube videos and listen to music. I’m gonna see if i can keep this going and start on my school work tomorrow, Theres a lot to catch up on before lectures resume, and I actually want to do well this year. 

I think getting things off my chest has allowed me to start to move on.