Let Me Sleep - Blog Posts

I don't like living I want to sleep I want to be put into a coma until my body eventually rots and decays I don't want to live yet I'm too scared to die so let just me sleep forever more until my soul fades out of existence sleeping is nice I like sleeping when I'm asleep I don't need to think when I'm asleep I don't need to dictate my future that's coming far too soon when I'm asleep I don't need to feel I don't like feeling I don't understand feeling feeling feels weird I don't like it I want to sleep I want to rest let me sleep

no one gets it...and even if they did, the universe is keen on not making our paths cross. I wish to meet him, the him as crazy and angry and sad as me, he understands phone lines don't help with depression, he'll see people talk about SH and think he deserves it but he'll never do it since he's too scared, he bed rots all day, his bed has become his casket, his only sense of enjoyment is the media he consumes, he has soulless dead eyes and a nose comparable to gods, his eyes are auburn and hair dark curly but what is the point of being beautiful if people use that against you too? what is the point of being ugly if people use that against you too? he tries manifestation, witchcraft, subliminals, anything— to stop the voices in his head saying "this is all meaningless." because no one wants to hear that, no one wants to share pain, only joy. "who will share my pain with me?" he wonders. he is me. he is everything i am and everything I'm not. and I want to cling to his skin, not just mine. and I want to feel him inside me, not just my fingers. and I want to look into his eyes, not just from my mirror. Voglio vivere e morire con lui.....but he's just, not, there.

Seriously, if someone doesn’t walk over and knock me unconscious right now, I should be clearly marked dangerous for the environment, and locked up in my room ‘till next year.