Hunter X Hunter X Y/n - Blog Posts

Why? Pt.1

Hisoka x reader

Angst, hurt, a sprinkle of fluff. Hisoka tells you that he no longer loves you…

Your pov

Why? That’s the question I keep asking myself. Why did he go? What did I do? That night replays in my head like a broken record. It drains me and it makes me ill. He made so many promises to me. Promises I knew he wouldn’t keep, but I thought maybe I’d be different. Maybe I could be the one he could love. I have so much, but got nothing in return. Now he’s gone. Probably off with someone else saying the same things he said to me. Hisoka is a liar and a true heartbreaker. But I truly cannot see myself not loving him. It’s been three months since I’ve seen him or even heard anything from him. But what do I care? He’s the one that left. I can’t keep crying into my pillow at night wishing he was there. He’s never coming back and it’s time to move on. 

Truth is, moving on isn’t as easy as I wanted it to be. I’m currently working at the bakery I’ve worked at for years. Serving customers as I normally would. Putting on my pretty fake smile and voice so that no one can see my raging pain. He “loved” me more than anyone I had ever been with before. He showed me things that I would’ve never seen if it weren’t for him. My chest feels like a open would that will never heal no matter what I try. My boss, Kyo, is starting to notice how I drift off into my own thoughts. She never says anything, but I know she’s worried. She’s always been so caring. Kyo was the first person I went to after Hisoka left. I never told her what happened and she never asked. I appreciate that from her because I wish I didn’t have to constantly remember that night…

Three months ago…

I waited for him like I always did. Hisoka never stayed for more than a week at a time. Always saying he had work to do and how important it was. I never questioned him about it because I understood the importance of my own job.

I suddenly heard the front door open. Sitting up from the couch I greeted him with the same sweet smile I always gave him. Despite his absence, I still loved him. And I always had hope that once his job was done, we could go back to how we were before.

This time was different, he didn’t smile back. In fact he looked at me like I was a total stranger. He stood there with the door still open staring at me not saying a word. It’s was strange and I swear I got a chill down my spine from the intensity. My throat got dry and my anxiety was high. I knew something was wrong, but I never could imagine the words that wold come out of his mouth…

“I have no need for you any longer. You are far too weak for someone like me. You no longer interest me. Look at you. You’re a mess. You look like you’ve aged since I’ve been gone. Thankfully after tonight I will never have to lay a single eye on your pathetic self.” Hisoka said with laced with venom.

I froze. I couldn’t move. All those years of “I love you’s.” All those years of him saying I didn’t need to be strong that my love was strong enough. How beautiful I was to him. How he told me he cared for me. Now, all gone with a single paragraph of hurtful words.

“Why?” I whispered

“Like I said I have no use for you any longer.” Hisoka spoke matter-of-factly

My heart shattered with his words. He meant it. He was telling the truth. This was as serious as I’ve ever heard him. My eyes poured and my body felt hot. Hisoka just stood there watching. Staring at my broken figure. Finally, after a few minutes, he turned around and walked out of my life forever…

Back to present…

Back out of my daze I finally noticed a customer staring at me with an uncomfortable expression on their face. I quickly apologized and received their order. As much as I want to move on and know I should. I still cannot get over him. But I will try because that’s all I can do. He’s gone and he’s never coming back. He never loved me, he only used me until he got bored of me. Never again will I allow anyone to treat me with such heartbreak.

But I still ask myself… “Why?”

*Third person pov*

What you didn’t know, was Hisoka was there. He was dressed in average street clothing. His hair was down and his makeup removed to show his rather pale but handsome complexion. He was peaking through the bakery window. Enough to see you, but not enough for you to see him. Watching you with a melancholy expression. He had been coming to that same spot every day since he broke your heart. He broke your heart because he was threatened and he wasn’t sure if he was strong enough to fight alone. No one knew the two of you were together, but it was only a matter of time. Hisoka regrets what he did. And if time allows and the threat is gone… he vowed to do everything to win back your heart and fix the shattered pieces. He never understood how you made him love you. All he can think of is your love and your passion and a single word that constantly swims in his mind… “Why?”

Thank you for reading ❤️

Part 1/ Part 2

*I do NOT own any characters except y/n*

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