Astarion X Male Tav - Blog Posts

☆ with you, eternally

astarion x male reader [he / him]

sypnosis: (spawn) astarion decides to step out into the sun after his partner passes away so they could be together forever. (meant to be viewed as romantic)

the lowercase is intentional !

- warnings: character death

it had been a while since all the mindflayers and the tadpoles and the brain. actually, it had been years. decades had already come and go since then, and astarion couldn't tell that so long had already passed.

yet, so many things reminded him that time was going past.

[name] was aging, gracefully in fact. astarion loved all the wrinkles that adorned his lover's skin, or the greys that streaked [name]'s hair. those small details helped remind astarion that the world was still progressing, that he wasn't stuck in one place dreading for his end like when he was with cazador. though, it did feel like he was stuck in time, but that was because he was with [name]. he always felt as if he was stuck in slow motion with him, never wanting the days, weeks, months and years to come to an end.

but, as time progressed, [name]'s health started to decline. it wasn't anytning at first, he was perfectly fine. yet, when the wrinkles started growing deeper and when he'd get ill more often astarion knew something was up. he knew that his time with [name] wasn't going to last long. it wasn't going to in the first place anyway. astarion was cursed with immortality, whilst [name] was blessed with mortality.

astarion looked over at his lover, watching as their gaze was focused on the window outside. it was getting harder for [name] to do simple tasks on his own such as walking, eating and other mundane tasks that he had brushed past during his younger years. of course, astarion helped [name] every step of the way. he wanted to spend every moment with [name], even if it could be their last one together.

[name] looked over at astarion, noticing that someone's gaze was on him. "i don't understand why you still sit and stare at me.. i'm far too old for you to still find me attractive." [name] laughed lightheartedly. he then started coughing, making astarion's eyes widen and ears perk up out of worry and fear.

once [name] stopped coughing, astarion sighed. "i still find you attractive, dear. i'll always find you as dashing as the first day i met you, even if you were a pile of mush." astarion responded, a small smile on his face even though it pained him to see what [name] was going through.

"you are too kind.." [name] laughed a little again, his breathing deep and slow as his eyes trailed back to the window. "i'm honestly.. surprised you're still here with me. i could die at any moment, yet you stay by my side even though you can live forever." [name] whispered, his voice carried with a twinge of sadness to astarion.

astarion felt himself frowning. he didn't like where this conversation was going, not one bit. he didn't like the idea of [name] leaving him so soon, he couldn't bear it. he didn't want someone to leave him, he didn't want to be alone.

sure, astarion could've always made some effort to find an immortal lover like himself. yet, he made no such efforts to do so. [name] was his, for forever. no matter if [name] was a mere mortal or not.

"my dear, i will stay by you for as long as i will roam the earth." astarion replies, his own voice coming out as a whisper. he kneels infront of [name], taking their hand in his own before he pressed his lips to the hand. "whether you are dying, or well, i will always be by your side. i could never leave you." astarion mumbled as he pressed another kiss to [name]'s hand.

[name] hummed, turning his head back so he could look down at astarion with a small smile. "thank you, my love." the man responds, voice croaky and hoarse from the old age.

"there's no point of sharing this.. immortality of mine if i couldn't share it with you." astarion whispers, trying to refrain himself from tearing up. "even if it's just for a glimpse, a brief part of my life but all of yours.. i wouldn't want it any other way." astarion admits, looking up at [name] with a smile. yet, behind the smile were broken eyes full of pain and grief for what's to come.

[name] stares down at astarion in awe from his words. he feels touched and warmed by his lover's words. "my love.. you don't know how much i appreciate your words. you don't know how much i appreciate you.. how much i appreciate you sticking by my side.." the old man speaks, voice wavering and shaking.

astarion presses his forehead against [name]'s hand, using his own hand to squeeze theirs. he tries to keep himself from letting tears spill, but it's too late. a few start to fall onto [name]'s hand, then more and more fall onto the hand the floor.

[name] takes his free hand and he strokes astarion's cheek with it, trying to get him to look up. "don't cry, my love. i'm not gone yet.." [name] adds, a small chuckle leaving his lips as he spoke to try and lighten the mood. he just didn't want to come to terms that he'd be leaving astarion so soon.

astarion looked up and he nodded, wiping his face with his sleeve. he tried to calm down before he spoke again, he didn't want to look weak now. he couldn't act weak now. he still had to be there for [name], and [name] wasn't gone yet.

"can you lead me to the bedroom, please? i think i need to go and take a nap." [name] asks, moving the topic of conversation along. he didn't want to dampen the mood any further, the air was already thick with sorrow after all.

astarion nodded and he got up, brushing the dust off of his knees. the vampire spawn then took [name]'s arms, helping him walk over to the bedroom. once they arrived into the bedroom, astarion helped his lover onto the bed. he tucked [name] in, pressing a kiss to their wrinkled forehead before he got in next to them.

"i love you, my little star. i always will, even when my candle goes out." [name] whispers, closing his eyes slowly so he could get his rest.

astarion rested his head on [name]'s chest, listening to his slow heartbeat. "i love you, forever and always my dear." astarion whispers back, a smile on his lips as he tries to not think about what the future holds for them.

a few hours pass, and astarion moves to see if [name] is awake. the man should've woken up a while ago, his naps weren't always this long. maybe [name] was just feeling extra drowsy? astarion didn't want to think of anything else.

astarion lifts his head and he sees that [name]'s chest has stopped moving up and down. surely he's just seeing things, right? astarion just stares for a few seconds and he gulps. there's no breathing.

the vampire spawn reaches out and grabs [name]'s hand. it's cold. yes, [name] had recently been growing colder and colder, not being the same firey warmth astarion was used to. but, this time the coldness was different. it was almost as if [name] was a solid block of ice. maybe it was because there was a breeze in the room? that was surely it, right?

astarion rests his head on [name]'s chest once again to confirm his suspicions. he needs to be 100% sure of something before he jumps to conclusions. and there it is.. [name] no longer has a pulse. there's no longer a heartbeat astarion can hear to remind him that his lover is alive.

"no.." astarion mumbles, lifting his head up once more to take a look at his dearest. "no, no, no.." astarion shakes his head, trying to blink away incoming tears but it's no use. his love is gone. nothing can bring him back. no tears, no cries or screams are going to bring [name] back. there was absolutely nothing. [name]'s candle had been blown out, and too early for astarion's liking. there was so much unspoken words, so many things astarion could've said and things he wanted to say. but it was too late.

astarion started bawling. he gripped tightly onto his dead lover's body, not letting it go. it was as if he was protecting it from some unknown entity, scared they were going to take away [name] from him. but, they already had.

"no.. [name] why?!" astarion sobbed into [name]'s chest. he couldn't even let out any proper tears, he was silently crying, screaming even, into [name]'s unbeating chest.

astarion's mind and heart rattle inside of him. they wrestle, trying to get astarion to listen, to do one thing that they offer. yet, astarion does not budge. he does not hear his heart or his mind. the only thing he can hear is his silent crying into [name]'s chest, the sound he desperately didn't want to hear until years into the future.

the vampire's mind screams and yells at him, telling him that astarion should join him. his mind screams that they could be together forever if astarion just joined him. but how? there was no possible way for astarion to join [name], as much as he wanted to.

yet, there was a solution. the sun.

astarion was only a spawn, he couldn't walk out in the sun without a fear of being burnt into a crisp. the only method of him joining [name] would be walking out into the sun or getting staked in the heart. astarion opted for the sun.

astarion let go of [name]'s body, running out of the house and into the sun. the golden hues kissed his pale skin, until they started to burn. piece by piece, astarion started to flow away as ash. the ash littered the sky, almost telling a story of the words astarion wanted to say, the story of his tragedy.

perhaps it was a spur of the moment thing, a stupid, silly idea that astarion shouldn't of acted upon. but it was too late now. astarion could now finally be with [name], eternally. they could finally be together until the end of time.

astarion didn't want anything else, just to be with [name] forever and always.

- author's note: hope you guys enjoyed :)

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☆ i want you

astarion x male reader [he / him]

sypnosis: under cazador's rule, astarion never got what he wanted. but, that changed ever since he met [name]. (meant to be viewed as romantic)

the lowercase is intentional !

for the past 200 years of his life, astarion never had a say in what he wanted to do. he had to go out, look for people to lure back to cazador and sleep with those said people. it was never what he wanted. it was what cazador wanted.

astarion had to listen to orders from his 'master'. he had to always follow his 'master's wants and demands, or else something bad would happen.

but astarion didn't want to listen.

astarion wanted to chose to do what he wanted, not what cazador wanted. why did he have to do what someone else wanted him to do? why was that person not able to accomplish their wants on their own? astarion did understand.

by coincidence, astarion found himself on a mindflayer ship and soon crash landing near a beach.

the spawn was free from cazador, at least for now. he was able to walk into the sun too for the first time in 200 years. most importantly, astarion felt free. well, his idea of 'being free' was quite restricted. he now had a parasite that could turn him into a tentacled, brain eating monster at any point. astarion didn't like how that was his definition of being free from cazador.

of course, down the line of astarion's new found and temporary freedom, he met [name]. from that day forth, the two started travelling together.

there was something about [name] that astarion couldn't understand. he was nothing like the other people astarion knew. he was nothing like astarion's brothers, or sisters or even cazador. there was something different about him.

[name] listened. he listened to everything astarion, and other companions, said to him. he was so attentive and observant, which was quite unlike all the people astarion had met before. it was all about them and their feelings and their wants, not astarions.

it made astarion feel something. it made the vampire spawn feel something that he hadn't felt in his 200 years of 'living'. yet, astarion couldn't bring himself to understand what this feeling was. or, well, he didn't want to confront the feeling after being trapped for so long not being able to have what he wants.

night had fallen upon camp, and everyone was sitting around the fire. everyone was laughing, making jokes and telling eachother stories about their pasts before the parasites. that was everyone except astarion.

astarion was lurking in the shadows, just as he did before when he did the things cazador wanted him to do. astarion's mind was just rattling, plaguing him with different ideas about [name] and he just didn't want to confront himself about it. astarion tried his hardest to push away these thoughts and feelings, to lock them away forever, but nothing was working.

a sudden snap of a branch was heard, making astarion shoot his head towards the noise. it was [name], a smile plastered on his face and a glass of wine in his hands that he held out for astarion to take.

"you looked lonely, i thought you might want some company." [name] said as he walked closer to astarion, taking a seat on the floor besides the spawn.

astarion took the wine and he started to sip on it, not making any eye contant with [name] whatsoever. why did the man he was just thinking of and trying to hard to ignore the feelings he had for have to show up? and why did he have to be so nice, and caring, and considerate all the damn time?

the vampire spawn sighed to himself, although it was still loud enough for [name] to hear him do so. he took another sip of the wine and his eyes darted from his glass, to [name] and back again. he wanted to say something to the other man, but he didn't know what to say.

"i think.. i think i've finally figured out what i want." astarion mumbled into the glass, his eyes fixated on it, no longer moving to look at his companion.

[name] turned his head towards astarion and he raised an eyebrow. he was definitely curious as to what his friend 'wants'. he was surprised that astarion even decided to bring up such a thing in the first place. "oh?" is all [name] responded with, wanting astarion to keep the conversation going.

astarion cleared his throat before he spoke yet again. "i mean, i've always had to do what others wanted me to do, like cazador.. but i've finally figured out what i want." astarion continues speaking, secretly hoping that [name] isn't weirded out by what he's saying.

"well, what is it that you want?" [name] hummed in response, a smile forming on his lips as his face was still turned towards astarion. he'd be willing to help out the spawn with his desires, no matter what those desires may be.

astarion took a deep breath and he finally looked at [name]. for some reason he felt so flustered and mushy, he never felt like this when luring people to cazador. but then again, [name] always made him feel so different.

"i want you." astarion whispered, his crimson eyes glimmering in the moonlight as they stayed fixated on [name]. "not just for sex or passion, i want you fully. for love and simple pleasures between us two." astarion confessed, feeling relieved for finally admitting his feelings but at the same time feeling proud for saying what he wanted.

[name] sat there processing astarion's words for a few seconds. astarion was getting a little nervous admittedly at [name]'s lack of response. nobody who astarion manipulated or tricked before ever stayed this silent at some seduction. but this wasn't just simple seduction, this was the truth. astarion truly did want [name].

a smile was still on [name]'s lips after he had processed the words astarion had given him. there was no look of disgust or annoyance on the man's face, and quite frankly astarion was glad.

"i think i could make that work." [name] finally replied, taking astarion's empty hand into his own. he then stroked the pale elf's hand gently, still looking up at his face. "we could make this work." [name] finished his response with a kiss to astarion's hand, and astarion felt the happiest he had ever felt in years.

astarion had finally gotten what he had wanted. he now had [name], and [name] had him. astarion couldn't feel any better. he was so glad that he could get the things that he wanted, not the things that others wanted.

astarion finally felt the freest he had ever felt in 200 years.

☆ author's note: hope you guys enjoy (even if this is kind of short)! i finally triggered astarion's confession scene today :') keep requests coming! you guys can also request some valentine's day themed things too!

☆ masterlist ▪︎ request

☆ touches

astarion x male reader [he / him]

sypnosis: astarion doesn't remember the last time he felt the touch of someone that wasn't for sexual purposes. he hopes to remember all of [name]'s touches. (meant to be viewed as romantic)

the lowercase is intentional !

astarion doesn't remember the last time he's felt the sweet, loving touch of another. for the past 200 years it's just been touches of agony, or touches of sexual pleasure. nothing else.

but, then there was [name]. a man he met right after the nautiloid crashed, and he's been travelling with the other ever since then.

astarion had grown quite fond of [name], but he wasn't going to admit that. he couldn't admit that because he quite frankly didn't know how to. all he knew about loving another was just seducing and manipulating them so they'd sleep with him, trust him forever. astarion didn't know true love yet.

a sigh escapes the vampire spawn's lips as he rests at his tent. he's reading through a book, sipping from his goblet, wine pouring down his throat and for some reason astarion just can't get [name] out of his head.

he wants to care for the man, to be held by the man. he didn't just want something sexual with [name]. he wanted something romantic, something sweet and innocent. something that wasn't like anything else had experienced. something new.

astarion shook his head, trying to shake off the thoughts that were plaguing him. he couldn't think of another like this, it was unusal and nothing at all like him.

[name] noticed the small look of sadness that was plastered on astarion's face. it was something different - [name] never noticed the vampire spawn to have such an expression. naturally, the man was concerned for his companion.

"astarion?" [name] said as he approached the said male, a small smile on his face as he got closer to astarion. he tried to reassure him with his words and the look on his face, not make him any more upset than he already was.

"is something wrong, darling?" astarion replied, his face immediately being wiped of any sign of saddness or discomfort. he was hiding his true feelings, like always.

[name] studied astarion's face well, looking him up and down to see the hint of sadness that was on his face before. astarion's face didn't show it, he hid it. but his eyes told his secrets.

"you.. there's something wrong isn't there?" [name] responded to astarion's question with another question, crossing his arms over his chest. "i won't pry.. but i'm worried for you astarion. i've never seen you, well, upset before." [name] sighed, a small frown now forming on his lips.

astarion was surprised with [name]'s answer, to say the least. he didn't expect the man to be so perceptive of everything, let alone of someone like astarion.

the gesture warmed astarion's cold heart, and astarion felt like it was beating again. nobody had ever made him feel such a way these past 200 years. nobody cared about what astarion felt or wanted, they only cared about torturing him or trying to get into bed with him.

"i care for you, astarion. truly." [name] continued as he took a few, cautious steps forward, not wanting to startle astarion. "i'm here for you, and i want to help you with whatever it is you're upset about." the male carried on speaking gently before he took ahold of both of astarion's pale hands, stroking them.

astarion felt like he was melting. [name]'s soft touches were just doing it for him, he wanted to stay like this for as long as possible. he wanted to remember this moment for as long as he lived. he was finally being touch with such gentleness, such softness and love. he felt as if his heart was actually beating again.

"it's nothing, my dear. just.. something silly. it's nothing, really." astarion smiles at [name], but the other is not convinced at all by the elf's words.

"i don't think it's nothing, astarion. you were upset and even if it is something.. i still want to hear it." [name] insists, even though he said a few moments prior that he wouldn't pry if astarion didn't feel like it. he still held the elf's hands in his own, never wanting to let go.

astarion submit to [name]'s words and soft touches. he couldn't say no to the man infront of him, even if he tried, and he tried, and he tried again. it wouldn't work.

astarion sighs and he shakes his head, taking a deep breath before speaking up again. "it's just.. i wished to have someone touch me in a more romantic, non sexual way. but.. you've fulfilled all of my desires, love. so there's nothing else to be said." the vampire spawn expresses his worries, a smile on his face as he speaks to [name].

[name] nods and listens intently to what astarion has to say about his worries. [name] feels sorry for astarion, how could he not? the other knew nothing of kindness, nothing of love and non-sexual intimacy for 200 years. he had been tortured, sleeping with other people without ever feeling the love of another.

"well, i'm glad i can help you, star." [name] replies with a whisper, a hand moving up to touch astarion's cheek. his touch is soft, warm and everything astarion wanted. the vampire spawn never wanted this to end. he wanted to stay like this forever, even if he had mentioned that to himself multiple times before.

"thank you." astarion says back to the man infront of him, his voice slightly breaking as his smile wobbles on his lips. he truly feels that this is the life he wants for the rest of eternity. he wants nothing else but these touches and sweet, sweet words.

[name] hums and he continues to stroke astarion's cheek tenderly, his eyes filled with love for the other man. he also didn't want this moment to end, as much as astarion didn't want it to end.

"you don't have to thank me. i'll always be glad to be by your side, and show you as much love as you need. whether that be touches, words or anything else that you need." [name] whispers into astarion's ear before placing a sweet kiss on astarion's cheek. his words were true and sincere, full of a love that astarion hadn't felt in so long.

astarion nods along to [name]'s words, savouring the moment for what felt like forever. he wanted to savour it for forever, he wanted to remember it for forever and all of the moments similar to this one that would follow after.

"i want to remember all of these moments.. all of these touches for forever." astarion confesses, his words almost hushed so only [name] could hear them and nobody else at camp. it felt like they were the only two people there.

"then, i'll keep giving you new moments to remember too. for as long as possible." [name] responds, a feeling of truth and honestly behind his words. astarion definitely wouldn't be opposed to having more touches, words and memories shared with [name]. it would be simply wonderful. perfect even.

astarion knows he will remember the new memories of having felt the sweet, loving touch of another. for the next 200 years and beyond, he will remind himself of [name] and every moment they shared. they love that they had for eachother.

astarion is sure to remember.

☆ author's note: hope you guys enjoy my first bg3 fic! astarion is who i am currently romancing on my first try too. i'm looking forward to romancing wyll next, all of his scenes just seem so sweet. the dancing.. might write something about it. keep requesting too!

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Astarion's Forest Clearing Scene M4M/NB

I wanted to write a retelling of Astarion's first romance scene from a positive angle, rather than assuming his initial interest is all a ruse because he has trauma. I like the idea of him reinterpreting his past through a new lens early on and grappling with that. The first chunk is an extension of the sexual part we see a bit of, and the second chunk is afterwards: Tav's asleep, and Astarion is in his head about the past. Just be aware there are non-specific mentions, mainly in the second part, of his life with Cazador, and some PTSD symptoms.

Astarion x Tav (gender neutral, they/them, AMAB/male anatomy) Rating: Explicit

Words: ~2800

Setting: Private forest clearing, after the tiefling party

Content: They have enjoyable sex, he bites, Astarion's simple plan starts to fall apart a tiny bit at a time, he thinks back on the encounter and his past, Tav comforts him

Gender neutral but there's both a male- and female-bodied version of this, I couldn't decide because I'm too bi to function tysm for your understanding~

AFAB Tav / M4F version

“There you are.”

Astarion watched Tav’s head whip around in surprise at the sound of his voice. Good, he thought. He needed them a little off-balance to keep the upper hand.

“I've been waiting,” Astarion growled, drawing closer to his mark, his opening lines rehearsed. “Waiting since the moment I set eyes on you. Waiting… to have you.”

Tav raised their eyebrows as he sauntered towards them. He could smell their blood more and more, metallic and sweet, with just a hint of alcohol left. They were still a little tipsy from the party, but not drunk. He heard their heartbeat quicken.

“Well, here I am,” Tav chuckled nervously.

Luring them away from the party had been simple enough. Laying on the charm had done the trick - a few perfect lines, a pouty gaze, a calculated brush of the hand. Astarion knew from the look in their eyes earlier that he'd won, but it was a nice confirmation to see them now.

Astarion reached for one of Tav’s hands and closed the distance between them. He pressed his other hand behind the small of their back to pull them in for a firm kiss. The warmth of their body against his was invigorating.

Tav melted into the kiss. Astarion could feel their interest poking at his hip as they made contact. He moved his free hand to the back of their neck and tilted his head deeper, Tav’s quiet groan stifled by his lips.

Finally, Astarion pulled back and pricked his face into a lopsided smile, regaining control of the situation.

“Gods, you're eager,” he purred. Tav's eyes flicked to the ground, eyebrows knitting with uncertainty. He hooked a finger under their chin to reassure them. “I like it.”

Tav met his gaze again, a small smile appearing on their face. “I suppose I was eager enough that I didn't… ask many questions. About you.”

Astarion’s stomach clenched, unsure of what to expect. “About me?”

“Yes, well… what you had planned for us tonight,” Tav said shyly, looking again at the ground. “Your… preferences. That sort of thing.”

Astarion chuckled with relief. “You mean position?” Tav's cheeks reddened and they nodded, letting out a small giggle. “I've done it all, practically,” Astarion said. Perhaps a bit arrogant, but he was trying to gauge their reaction. “I can be whatever you want me to be.”

Tav met his eyes again.

“I want you to be yourself,” they said earnestly.

Astarion felt a catch in his throat and swallowed against it. He couldn't think of a clever quip to respond to that.

“I'm partial to, erm… being in front,” Tav went on. Oh, thank the gods, Astarion thought. They were back in his comfort zone - sex, not emotions.

“I'm just a little…” their words trailed off.

“Afraid to turn your back on a vampire?” Astarion joked. Tav let out a surprised laugh, loud and genuine. Gods, they’re adorable.

“You don't need to worry about a thing,” he said, regaining a more serious tone. “I’ll let you set the pace, darling.”

Tav flashed that sweet smile again, leaning in for a kiss. They were more self-assured this time, placing their hands on Astarion's narrow hips and pushing against him of their own accord, trying to get a feel for him through his pants. He felt them poke at his hip again, knowing he was returning the favor. He inhaled sharply at the sensation, breaking from their kiss and grinding against them. Tav responded with a little moan, deep in their throat.

“I'll bet you have a pretty cock,” Astarion whispered in their ear, eliciting a gasp. “Perhaps I could see it, to confirm.”

“Perhaps.” Tav slid their hand even lower down his hip, grabbing at his ass. He pulled them in for another kiss, leaning back against a big tree. Astarion’s hand moved down between them, sliding over their belly to the front of their pants. He felt the outline of their cock, fabric taut around them. Tav inhaled deeply as they pulsed in response to his touch. Astarion moved his fingers up again, pulling at the fabric separating them. Tav moved their hands quickly to tug at their own waistband, exposing themself. He looked down admiringly for a moment.

“Gods, I was right. Look at you,” Astarion purred before taking them in his hand. A quiet moan escaped Tav’s lips. He could feel the heat radiating from their core and knew his hand must be cool against their skin. He ran his fingers down the length of their cock before gently jerking them. Tav thrusted towards him a little, their body close enough Astarion could hear their heart pounding. Gods, their blood must be so hot right now.

“I want yours,” Tav managed amidst their rising intensity. “I want to see you. Touch you.”

Astarion moved his hands to his own waistband, pulling his weapon free, watching their eyes widen at its appearance.

“Oh,” Tav blurted out. Astarion smirked, unphased. He knew he was beautiful. If he was anything, he was that.

After a second to register the new development, Tav reached for him. Their hand was so warm and soft against his skin. Astarion relaxed as they took him in their hand, letting out a sigh of pleasure.

To his surprise, Tav shifted to kneel on the ground. They met his gaze, searching for his permission to act. Taken aback, all Astarion could do was nod, watching as Tav tenderly kissed his hip, and then his cock. They parted their soft lips and licked at him. It had been a long time since anyone did this for him. Normally, he was the one on his knees, eager, convincing, charming.

Tav opened their mouth and surrounded him, sucking him off. Oh, hells, that feels good. He leaned his head back on the tree, his mind gone blank. Their mouth was so hot and smooth inside. He felt their tongue lapping at the underside of his cock as they worked.

Shit. He needed to regain control of the situation. Recall the mission at hand. Gods above, it was difficult. He put a hand to their cheek and they looked up, pulling their head away from him.

“Everything alright?”

“Yes, I just…” Words were evading him. Shit. “Come back up here.”

“Was it good?” Tav asked genuinely, standing to meet him again. “You seem a little-”

Astarion put his finger to their lips, quieting them. He put a hand in their damp hair, and kissed them, hard. He needed them to swoon, to cede control, to let him perform.

Tav broke the kiss to pull their shirt off, their hot, sweaty chest pushing up against his when they returned. He felt their exposed cock rub against his belly, leaving a drop of fluid on his skin. They seemed more than ready, but he liked to be certain.

Astarion ran his fingers down their lower back, reaching the slightly lowered waistband of their pants. He dipped his hand below their clothes, gripping at their round ass. He moved his mouth to their ear and kissed down the side of their neck, to their collarbone. He could feel them swaying, pressing into him, moaning softly, their heartbeat pounding in his ears. They were ready.

“Shall we lay down?” Astarion whispered between his own shallow breaths. Tav nodded eagerly. He laid out the linen sheet he'd brought along.

“It's not much, but it should keep the dirt off,” he chuckled, eliciting a smile from Tav. They laid on their side facing away from him.

Astarion followed their lead, laying behind them and pulling them into the crook of his body. They clumsily tugged at their pants until they were fully bare before him, thighs shivering with anticipation.

He wouldn't make them wait any longer. He disrobed and reached behind himself for the oil he'd brought, Tav peering back at him over their shoulder. He got the bottle open with his teeth and used his free hand to cover his cock thoroughly with the contents. He used the oiled hand to prep them as well, feeling them jump a little at his cool fingers. Such a nice ass.

“Are you ready?” Astarion asked quietly, knowing what they would answer.

“Yes,” came Tav’s shaky voice back at him. “Gods, yes. Start slow, okay?”

“Of course, darling,” he purred into their ear. “I'll take good care of you.”

Astarion gently pushed their top leg forward with his knee. He put his cock against their most delicate skin, feeling their hips quiver with excitement before gently pushing inside. Tav gasped and Astarion gave them a moment to settle before pushing himself further in, a little bit at a time, their every inhale matching his careful movements. He kept his hips restrained, moving slowly until he felt Tav's pelvis melt back into his own.

He wrapped his fingers around their hips, pulling them as close to him as possible. They let out a breathy moan, relaxed and open. He rocked forward into them, feeding off their little sounds of pleasure as he fucked them. So smooth and warm. What an ass. He closed his eyes and rested his slick forehead between their shoulder blades.

“Gods, you're so lovely,” Astarion panted at their back. “Oh, darling, you feel amazing.”

“You feel so- oh, so good,” Tav whined, their speech broken up by ragged breaths. “You- oh, Astarion!”

Something tugged uncomfortably in his chest. It had been a while since he’d heard his name said like that. Usually, he avoided giving it out or just lied, trying to avoid attaching his real name to a reputation for luring people into dark alleys. Many people didn't care enough to ask his name at all.

He let them do the work for a moment, grinding their hips back into him as he turned the thought over and over in his head. His mind raced with fragments of nights before.

“Astarionnn,” Tav whimpered, drawing out his name and snapping him back into the moment. “Fuck, you feel so- I’m close-”

Astarion gripped their sides and tilted their hips closer to the ground, using his knee to open their legs wider. Their back arched, ass grinding hard against his pelvis as they let out broken sounds.

“Ast- oh, I'm- I'm coming,” Tav cried out urgently. He slammed into them, rocking his hips but staying inside as they whimpered and got off. He could feel their heart, smell their blood. Oh, shit. His body suddenly ached with hunger.

“Oh, gods, that was…” Tav glanced back at him as they caught their breath. “I still want you. Please don't stop.”

Astarion looked down to see their cock standing at attention still. Their scent filled his mind, his stomach aching with the temptation.

Tav turned back to look at him again, realizing he'd lost focus. “Are you alright?”

“Your body- I'm starving,” he blurted out. Why in the hells did I say it like that?

“Oh, I thought you… I thought maybe you weren't enjoying it,” Tav panted. “You can have my blood. Whatever you need.”

Astarion's inhibitions melted in an instant. He bit down into their soft, tender neck, feeling their heart pump feverishly as he drank, his hips moving without thinking. The second taste was just as heavenly as the first had been, days before. Mixed with lust and self-satisfaction over his victory, it was nearly overwhelming.

As his hunger eased, he felt his arousal intensify. He started thrusting deep into Tav, hearing them cry out in response. His movements grew more urgent as he felt his self-control slipping. Oh, shit. He reached in front of Tav to grab their cock, feeling how desperately hard they were, and started pumping in rhythm with his own hips.

“Oh, fuck me!” Tav cried out, gasping for air. “Oh, Astarion! I'm- hahhh-” He felt them pulse, hard, over and over, his hand slipping as they came.

That was all the self-control he had left. He drank from them needily, breathing spottily, thrusting urgently. He groaned from the very bottom of his chest and came, hard, still latched onto Tav’s neck and buried deep inside of them.

Astarion’s hips and jaw relaxed and he flopped onto his back, panting so hard it made his head light. When he gained the self-awareness to check in with Tav, he saw them on their back, chest rising slower. They gazed over at him, eyelids soft and a little smile on their face.

“That was amazing,” they whispered.

“Yes, it was,” he puffed, still coming down from his own high.

After a few moments of silence, Tav spoke again.

“Astarion… I care about you.”

Oh, shit.

~~~~~

In the early hours of the morning, Astarion lay back amidst the roots of a huge tree. He had propped himself up comfortably, but wasn't ready to let his guard down yet. He’d snuck into camp earlier for a few things, including a blanket, as Tav said they wanted to stay in the clearing for a while. He couldn’t fault them for it - he hardly felt ready to face the others himself, to answer questions about what they’d been up to.

He looked over to where Tav lay sleeping, head resting on the ground close to his thigh. Their warmth was enticing, but he didn’t want to be touched. Astarion glanced at the small puncture wounds on their neck, remembering how good they had tasted. How they had trusted him.

He chased the thought away. Surely they'd only given their blood over in the heat of ecstasy. But even an hour later, he felt steady and fulfilled. Had they wanted him to feel this way? Were they even thinking straight in the moment? Astarion had given himself, and they drank greedily, selfishly even, but not maliciously. Could he say the same for himself?

I did what I had to, he thought. What he'd done to Tav, charming them into bed to gain their approval, was hardly the same as what had been done to him. Manipulative, certainly. But the moment he'd been waiting for had finally come, and he'd seized it.

He looked up through the leaves to the clear night sky above, hoping to drift away from his own thoughts. His muscles felt warm and relaxed from a fulfilling meal, yet his stomach churned uncomfortably. What in the hells is wrong with me? Astarion had slept with thousands of people in the past two centuries, but tonight had been flavored with something unfamiliar. The feeling wriggled just out of reach when he tried to pin it down.

A chilled breeze caused Tav to stir in their sleep. Astarion glanced down, noticing the blanket had fallen from their shoulders. He adjusted it with a light tug, trying to fix it without waking them. He wasn’t ready for whatever they might say. He’d been rendered speechless by their admission before.

Why should it matter to him? He’d heard similar things out of the mouths of perfect strangers, drawn in by his charming facade, confusing lust for love.

Then again, none of them survived the night.

Astarion’s stomach roiled with the realization, feeling like he might be sick. He hadn’t slept with anyone who lived to tell of the encounter in two hundred years. He couldn’t even remember who he’d been with before he turned; only that he hadn’t been inexperienced. Cazador hadn’t needed to train him in the art of seduction.

Astarion’s legs tensed with the very thought of his captor, as if his body was preparing to run at a moment’s notice. His thigh jerked, disrupting Tav from their peaceful sleep. Gods damn it. Not now. Please, not now.

“Wha- Astarion?” came their quiet voice, bleary and confused.

“Yes,” he choked out, staring up at the sky to avoid their gaze. “I’m here.”

“Oh,” Tav muttered, remembering where they were. “Are you all right? You look… pained.”

Astarion closed his eyes, swallowing against the lump in his throat. Tav didn't know about the hell he'd endured. They didn't need to know. “Yes, I’m fine. Just a little… restless, that’s all.”

“Will you lay with me?” they asked, voice soft with concern. “I know you don’t sleep, but…”

“I suppose so,” Astarion said quietly, after a pause. The prospect was so foreign, but sounded almost pleasant. This openness is but a small indiscretion; nothing more. He could work on regaining control of the situation tomorrow. At first light.

He slid down the tree to lay on his back, willing his muscles to loosen up. Tav snuggled into the crook of his arm, resting their head on his shoulder. The warmth of their skin against his was calming, like laying near the campfire.

The exhaustion of the day before seemed to wash over him all at once. He'd been completely satiated, hips weary, stomach comfortably full. He could feel the gentle waves of rest lapping at the edges of his mind, begging him to finally fall into a trance for the night.

“Thank you,” Tav whispered, their breath slow and hot against his bare chest. “Goodnight.”

“Sweet dreams, darling.”