A Hostage Cover I Once Sang (turn Up Your Volume Bc The Audio Is Straight-up Shit)

What on earth have I just created?

as a very wise sensei named Wu once said: “The best way to defeat an enemy is to make them your friend”. Or well lover in this case

"I thank you, hero, for saving our kingdom from the demon queen. However, may I ask how you defeated her?" "Oh, I married her."

How was your day, bud? ALSO I FOUND YOUR ACCOUNT!! >:]

HEYOOOO! Also I’m doing great! Thanks!

Why does your video watermark change overtime-

bcuz I like that lmao

as a short person, yes.

Hello! <3 height difference prompts but character A used to tease B when they were kids but now that they're older , A is constantly the butt of all the short jokes since B is now taller than them .

List of height difference prompts 

“Look at you. So small and cute, huh?” “Shut the hell up.”

Character B wrapping their arm around Character A’s shoulders whenever possible; ruffling their hair with their hand and grinning when Character A grumbles at them for it.

“I could fit you in my luggage.” 

“You’re like an arm rest.”

“So I’m going to have to bend my knees just a little bit for you to hear me properly?” 

“You have five centimeters over me but you’re acting all high and mighty about it. Grow the hell up.” “Well, clearly I’ve grown a lot better than you.” “I will end you”

Character B purposefully making things out of reach for Character A. “Can you get that for me?” “Can I what?” “Can you please get that for me?”

“Need my shoulders to see up there?” “Piss off.”

“Maybe milk will still save that height of yours.” “Oh my God—”

“If I’m a late bloomer than you’re a really late bloomer. You’re probably never going to bloom at all; you’ve reached your maximum capacity.” “I’ll give you exactly five seconds to take that back.”

“I could lift you up off the floor while kissing you.” “Excu— what are you doing?! Put me down!”

“You’re threatening but like, in a very adorable way.”

“I’ve been breaking my back trying to kiss you.” “I’m not that fucking short.”

Character B helping Character A get something they need but then holding it out of reach from them, a grin on their face when Character A starts getting frustrated. “Give that to me, you stupid giant!”

“If you want to experience the world up here, you can always give me a call.” “I’ll kick you in the back of your knees and make you kneel in front of me.” 

As someone with hospital trauma, I love these

For the one word game: hospital

Hospital

"Visiting hours are almost over. But I really don't want to leave."

They always felt uncomfortable being in a hospital.

"Do you know first aid?" "Not exactly, but I love hospital shows."

They couldn't wait to get the go ahead to finally leave this place.

Waking up in a hospital, when they hadn't been there before is terrifying. But at least they didn't wake up alone.

"I spent too much time in hospitals already."

"They did not leave the hospital when you were out of it. They wouldn't leave your side."

"The nurses are awesome. Makes me almost sad to leave them. But I definitely want to go home."

Working in a hospital was stressful, so they were happy to come home to a relaxing home.

One Word Prompt Lists

Another hilarious review lmaoooo

I’M FUCKING DYING OF LAUGHTER AT THESE POSTS😭😭😭

Jeph Jacques decided to go out in a blaze of shitposts and in his honor I think it's only right to share these tweets with a wider audience

goodnight, sweet prince

I’m not crying you are

i love finding poetry in the mundane, and yesterday i stumbled upon something that just hits that spot

So, my partner has an old phone- It served them for many years now, but it has one issue: Charging it is hard. Their current charger is hanging on by a thread (literally), and can barely do its job. The phone and the charger came together: They've never used another charger for said phone.

Now, they've tried to replace the charging cord several times. But it doesn't matter how much they've searched what damned specific charger the phone uses, none of them work. They finally decided to bring it to a phone shop and ask what should they use.

The guy at the shop looked at the phone for a bit, and explained: "The port itself is broken. The charger you have works with this phone because they've mutually broken each other into the same shape, in a way that no other charger is shaped. The port itself has corroded in a way that only accepts the charger that shaped it like that in the first place."

And while this is of course a frustrating situation for my partner, I feel like there's a metaphor here. I could write a goddamn story about this. These two half-broken old things have been together for so long they've destroyed each other in a way that keeps them from working with anything else. They've hurt each other in a way that barely keeps them functioning together, and have been rendered useless with literally anything else.

This too is toxic yuri to me-

YOU HAVE A TUMBLR??? -YummyArepas

Yessir😎

Also now that you found me, take these Taco memes