Hizashi Doesn't Need To Sing In Order To Make Shouta Fall In Love With Him, The Fish Is Already Very

baku and eri is inspired by actual people i saw on the train btw there was a dude head to toe in black but wearing a bright colorful butterfly bracelet with plastic beads and he was with his little sister decked out in pinks and yellows and it was wholesome as hell

All Might: Aizawa, help! Mic is stuck in a vent! Aizawa: yes Aizawa: I put him there All Might: What? Why?? Aizawa: he is repenting All Might: For what??? Mic, from the vent, voice muffled: I showed the kids a meme song compilation Aizawa, glaring at the vent: they have not. stopped. singing

Listen I know "Hizashi makes a mixtake for Aizawa" is the obvious route which is why everyone writes it but we must think of the even cuter, much more adorable route of "Aizawa making a mixtape for Hizashi because he knows Hizashi likes them" and trying to use Oboro and Nemuri as his music testers except they both have WILDLY different tastes and ideas so his end product is a veritable mess that he will be embarrassed about in his adult life but which Hizashi cherishes anyway

hm

TINY MIC

"AND I oop energy"

More sketches from @moorishflower‘s Wine-Dark Sea series

My mind is full of bio-luminescent cuttlefish displays, retractable teeth, gills gills gills, that one scene from The Sea Beast. The brain is very loud and it’s having lots of thoughts.

 @teejaystumbles does lovely art of this au

Hizashi: why are there so many scratches on your back?

Shouta: *flashbacks to last night when he cornered a stray cat after Hizashi told him not to*

Shouta: I'm cheating on you.

Hizashi: *flashbacks to watching Shouta go outside to try (and fail) to catch the cat*

Hizashi: no you're not.

Humans are weird: Best form of Revenge

Alien: What is the best way to get back at someone you despise?

Human: Why are you asking me?

Alien: Because humans are renowned for their ability to plan elaborate revenge schemes against those who have slighted them.

Human: On behalf of the human race I am offended by that.

Alien: I have witnessed you slowly drive your co-worker insane by moving everything in their office one inch to the left every day for 3 months.

Human: To be fair I only kept doing that because they refused to pay me back my $1.50 I loaned them for lunch.

Alien: *Stares at human with mocking eyebrows

Human: Fine, I see your point.

Human: Alright, here is what you do….

Alien: Wait, do you not wish to know why I want revenge?

Human: No.

Alien: Really?

Human: Yes.

Alien: Oh….okay.

Alien: So what should I do?

Human: Ignore them.

Alien: What?

Human: Ignore them, diminish them; make them feel beneath your notice.

Alien: That seems rather childish for an elaborate revenge plot.

Human: That is because I haven’t expanded it.

Human: If they come to you to gloat about something they did, anything, ask them who they are.

Human: When they explain who they are and how you should know them, still act like you have no idea who they are.

Human: If they continue to persist about how you should know them simply, and this is important, shrug and say “If you say so”, and then leave.

Alien: How is this revenge?

Human: Because in their eyes now they will think that they need to prove themselves somehow for you to notice them.

Human: Like a kid trying to win his drunken father’s affection.

Alien: That’s rather dark.

Human: So is revenge; keep up.

Human: Now they will continue to come back to you day after day trying to win your notice and you will continue to dismiss them or give them the bare minimum attention.

Human: If you want to get further under their skin start talking up someone else in their presence; someone who you would consider more of a rival then they are.

Alien: How would that work?

Human: Like this. *In mocking alien voice “Yes, yes, I’m sure you’ve done rather well for yourself; but not as much as Thomson on the 3rd floor. That bastard has been upselling me all week and I’m convinced he’s the one stealing my parking space.”

Alien: What good will that does to bring in someone else?

Human: By actually acknowledging someone who your target thinks is beneath them, they will further become enraged as you’ve just reinforced how little they appear on your radar.

Alien: And that works?

Human: Indeed.

Human: You need to treat your displeasure towards someone as gift to them, for you have deemed their existence worthy of acknowledgement.

Alien: Alright, I guess I could give it a shot. ------------------------------

*Two Months later

Human: So how’s the revenge going?

Alien: I’m not sure.

Human: What do you mean you’re not sure?

Alien: I mean they came up to me today and offered to have sex with me.

Human: Oh….in that case they must be very desperate for you to notice them.

Alien: What should I do?

Human: If you want to keep up with the revenge have sex with them, then afterwards don’t speak with them.

Human: If they come up to you and demand an explanation say that the sex was so bad you wanted to forget that moment by never speaking with them again.

Alien: ……………….

Alien: Who broke you to make you so devious?

Human: *Grins as they sip their drink

Human: I’m human; we were made broken.