If I Wasn't Specific With The Term >"special Someone"< Since Most Asks Go That Route, I'm Going To Be

Wenn du jegliche Erwartungshaltung abgelegt hast, hast es dann keine Vorfreude auf die Dinge bei denen du weißt, dass sie dich aus ganzem Herzen glücklich machen können und wirkt diese Neutralität nicht häufig kalt auf dein Umfeld?

Ich war schon lange nicht mehr wirklich glücklich bzw. war ich das auch nur äußerst selten in meinem Leben. Ich bin situativ und ganz temporär von kurzlebiger Zufriedenheit durchzogen, meist aber von Unzufriedenheit, welche ich als Antrieb für Wandlung verstehe. Ich denke, dass der Mensch überwiegend unzufrieden sein muss, um zu wachsen; anders hätte er gar keinen Grund dazu.

Gewiss, mein Umfeld kennt mich als einen recht gefühlskalten Menschen, aber sie lernten mich zu deuten. So zumindest die, die ich seit Jahren oder gar Jahrzehnten einen festen Teil meines Lebens nennen darf.

You said you get the most compliments for your ass but still you haven't even posted a single picture of your lower body? Are you skipping legs you wimp? 😂

I suppose I'm just not your typical fitness influencer who documents every workout session online using pictures or videos and I hardly post pictures on my blog. Admittedly, leg workouts are actually the least fun of all my workouts, but that just gives me even more motivation to do them.

So no, I don't skip legs.

What would be something you would want to say to your younger self if you could?

I think I would share a quote from Robert Jordan with him: "The oak fought the wind and was broken, the willow bent when it must and survived."

As with nearly everything in our world, this quote, offers myriad interpretations. Yet, I interpret it in a way that might have pointed my younger self in the right direction.

The oak embodies strength, steadfastness, and resilience - its very identity. It feels invincible, unyielding, a necessity; should it encounter something matching its strength, it would break. However, as anyone who is living knows, nothing matches life's strength, which strikes relentlessly and unapologetically. An oak, taught only to be strong and never to bend under life's winds, is destined to break. In contrast, the willow symbolizes flexibility, adaptability, and endurance - capable of bending with life's challenges without ever breaking.

The perceived strength of the oak thus becomes its greatest weakness, while the perceived weakness of the willow reveals its true strength.

Yet, I fear these words would fall on deaf ears, for the mindset of "having to be strong" is and always was deeply ingrained within me. Despite years of reflection, I have been unable to purge these thought patterns. It is a deeply rooted behavior, a toxin coursing through my blood, likely forever poisoning my veins.

No offense dude but you are so stupid and act so smart all the time. We're both going to die someday while I lived and enjoyed my life to the fullest without compromise and you struggled through workouts and an optimized diet every day. So tell me: what do you really get out of all this smartass?

A bigger coffin, I assume.

Do you ever feel that life is just unfair?

Honestly no, not anymore. But I had a lot of time to think about that and it never ceases to amaze me how many people still endeavor to impose the construct of fairness upon life. Life, by its very nature, defies fairness, for it cannot conform to this man-made ideal. Fairness is an anthropocentric notion, a concept forged within the crucible of social constructs, yet life itself is an composition of chaos and order, largely beyond the dominion of man. How, then, can anyone justly impose the concept of fairness upon such an enigmatic and indifferent domain?

You know I always had a feeling you were gay but now with all the calligraphy stuff on your blog I'm even sure. When is the coming out? Not good to live in a closet you know?

Oh well, you got me on that one, buddy.

There are only two small problems with your theory:

Calligraphy says absolutely nothing about a person's sexual orientation.

I feel only attracted to women.

But you'll be the first person I'll tell if that ever changes. It seems to be on your mind, after all.

Was steckt eigentlich hinter Deinem Tumblr Namen?

Also wie bist Du darauf gekommen und welche Bedeutung hat er (für Dich)?

Entstanden ist der Name aus einem dystopischen Gedanken an die Welt und einer Läuterung dieser durch Feuer.

Persönlich finde ich den symbolischen Gedanken der Reinigung durch Feuer, wie es theologisch betrachtet beispielsweise beim Fegefeuer der Fall ist, interessant. Ich kann mich allgemein für derartige Symboliken begeistern, wie jene, die sich beispielsweise auch in Dantes „Göttliche Komödie“ finden lassen, aber auch wenn wir aus diesem Rahmen ausbrechen und uns eher einem mythologischen hingeben - dort würden wir dann auch den altbekannten Phönix wiederfinden, welcher aus der Asche aufsteigt, wobei das eine weitaus zu positive und lebensbejahende Assoziation ist, als dass ich diese mit meinem Nutzernamen in Verbindung bringen würde.

Questions #1

Introduction

I would like to begin my regular questioning ritual with one of the most famous and enduring questions in philosophy. Despite its considerable age, this question has retained an enduring appeal for me. Given the myriad perspectives and explanations that exist, I am eager to hear about your views.

Question

Do you believe in free will, or do you think our lives are predetermined?

Attendees

@readsal @stargirll111 @passivelyalive @toterozean @violent138 @abrill @sidinsky @le-seul-mot0001 @iremiari @youngfanpeace @nirvakarma @itnashumate @nevermindbebe

Participate

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You're good at calligraphy! May I ask what writing instruments do you use? Please and thank you. 🖋️😊

Thank you.

I had already answered most of this in a previous German reply, but I'm happy to answer it again in English since you asked me so politely.

Nib holder

I use different nib holders, depending on the font. Since I write a lot of broken fonts, I usually use a nib holder made of wood with a chrome grip.

The nib holder is called "Federhalter ARTIST" and I purchased it from the German online store of "feder-fuehrend": https://www.feder-fuehrend.de/products/federhalter-artist-mahagoni-inkl-schreibfeder

Nibs

For the nibs themselves, I use bandzug nibs. I recommend nibs with less elasticity in the beginning, as they are easier to handle, and as you become more confident, you can increase the elasticity.

A good starter set is "Brause & Co, No. 180": https://www.feder-fuehrend.de/products/bandzugfeder-no-180-brause

I currently use the following nibs frequently:

William Mitchell, Pedigree, Round-Hand, Bronze

C. Howard Hunt Pen Co, Speedball Pens, C-Series

Heintze & Blanckertz, No. 600

I purchased these from the German online store "Kallipos": https://shop.kallipos.de/de/produkte/bandzugfedern

Paper

When it comes to paper, I use various types of it; Again, depending on the font, type of work, and writing utensils used.

Practice paper For normal practice, I often use lined practice pads or white non-lined paper with a thickness of 100g/m².

Project paper For my projects I use a different sort of paper. It is important to pay attention to the sizing in order to prevent the ink from "bleeding". In addition to sizing, a matte surface is also important, as ideally the nib should not slip off. I vary the thickness of these types of paper depending on the intended use, but it usually amounts to 120g/m² or 200g/m².

Paper for special inks For special inks, such as the golden ink in some of my uploads, I use special black colored paper from Italy (Burano nero - Roman Tower) in the thickness 200g/m².

I don't really have a store for paper, which I use regularly. At this point, I would just google for the appropriate paper and thickness.

Inks

The inks I use also vary quite a bit. But for the most part I use inks from "Rohrer & Klingner": https://www.rohrer-klingner.de/en/writing-ink/

I especially like to use the iron gall ink "Salix" and "Scabiosa".

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask me.