IMAGINATION VS REALITY

Where can I find "SELF"?

written: Bhasu - @ko-existing , inspo: Rupert Spira

Reader Namkha: I struggle a bit with this idea of returning to being. I can’t seem to find it, if that makes sense.

Answer: You're absolutely right, Namkha. You can’t "find" being in the way you might look for an object.

Trying to find 'Beingness' is like a gold ring searching for gold. The ring, as it appears, is merely a form, and it cannot locate the gold it seeks because it is looking from the perspective of its own form. In reality, it cannot find gold because it is gold.

Similarly, consider a wave trying to find the ocean. The wave may believe it is separate, yet it is actually an expression of the ocean itself. It cannot exist without the ocean, nor can it separate itself from it to find it.

In another analogy, a clay pot cannot search for the clay it is made from. The pot is simply a shape formed from the clay, and it cannot stand apart from it to observe it as something distinct.

Just like a gold ring cannot stand apart from gold, a wave cannot find the ocean, and a clay pot cannot find the clay, you cannot find your own Beingness as if it were an object to be discovered. You are your Beingness.

What we perceive, including what you call a body, thoughts, or feelings, are appearances – seeming appearances – not Actuality. Actuality, or Reality, is the "Awareness" , "SELF", "Namelessness", that is ever-present, never perceived as an object.

Just as you need distance to see an object, all knowledge within the effect of your mind, seem to work in a subject-object relationship. We can only know something if we stand apart from it. This is true for everything in experience: thoughts, feelings, sensations.

We can know them because we stand as the Knower, seemingly apart from the known object. However, this relationship is part of the world of appearances – it’s not the "Reality".

The "exception" is the "Knowing of Being" – "Awareness". This "Knowingness" is beyond the subject-object split.

When you say, "I know myself," the "I" that knows and the "SELF" that is known are not two. There’s no distance between the two because they are the same. This is the direct, non-conceptual experience of "Beingness", the "Actuality" of "Awareness".

So, when you say, "I can’t find myself," you’re correct in that you can’t find yourself as an object in appearance. But at the same time, "you" do know yourself as the pure "Knowingness."

For example, if I ask you now, "Are you aware?" what would you say?

Reader Namkha: Yes, I would say I am aware.

Answer: Exactly. And what is it that knows you are aware? It’s simply "awareness" itself, not an object. "SELF" knows "itSELF". This is the "Knowingness" that doesn’t involve any concept or object. It’s the "Actuality" of "Awareness" – "Awareness" being aware of itself. Just like the sun illuminates the world, it also illuminates itself – but not by standing apart from itself.

This Knowing of Being is non-dual; there’s no subject and object. There is only the direct "Knowingness", the "Actuality" of your own "Beingness". That’s why you can’t "find" yourself as an object of perception. But you do know yourself, directly and clearly, through this self-illuminating "Awareness". This is the "Reality" that must not be mistaken for the appearances we seem to experience.

Reader Namkha: So, do I need to step back from the intellect in order to understand this?

Answer: Yes, you need to step back from the intellect because the intellect operates within appearances, within duality. The intellect can only conceptualize things in terms of subject and object, but it cannot grasp the "Actuality" of "Beingness". When I ask, "Are you aware?" you might formulate the response, "Yes." But this response is just a reflection of your direct experience of "Awareness", which is beyond concepts.

Even without the words, "I am aware," the experience remains: you are aware. This is the essence of Non-Dual "Knowingness". It is not a thought or a concept – it is your actual "Beingness". It’s not something you think about; it’s something you are.

Reality beyond the intellect and appearances.

Reader Namkha: I see. Can I ask something else about the meditation I did this morning? When I was meditating, I felt a heaviness in my chest and a coldness around me. This often happens, and I’m not sure how to make sense of it.

Answer: You mentioned feeling a heaviness in your chest and a coldness around you. Now, these are sensations you are aware of, but they are just appearances. There are two parts to this experience: 1) the appearance of sensation (heaviness or coldness) and 2) the fact that you are aware of these sensations.

Instead of focusing on the sensation itself, let’s shift focus to the "I" that was aware of the heaviness. What do you mean when you say, "I was aware"? What is this "I"? Is it also an appearance, or is it something beyond?

Reader Namkha: I’m not sure. I feel like the "I" is awareness, but I can’t fully describe it.

Answer: Exactly! When you try to describe the "I," you realize there’s nothing objective there to describe. The "I" you refer to is not an appearance, not part of what you experience as sensations or thoughts. It is the "Knowingness" itself. This is why you paused – because "Awareness" cannot be objectified. It is not part of the world of appearances.

This pause is important. It is a recognition of your true nature, which is not something objective or conceptual, but the "Actuality" of "pure Awareness". When you try to "look" at yourself, there is nothing to see, because the "I" that is aware is beyond all appearances – it is "Reality" itself.

Keep "exploring", but do so through the direct "Knowing" of your "Beingness", not through the intellect or appearances. This is where the "Real" is noticed.

Reader Namkha: Thank you.

Answer: You’re welcome.

Keep going in this way, focusing on the direct experience of the Actuality of Beingness, not appearances :-)

“ “

This will be my longest post (sorry in advance for this meaningless essay), but my final post. All I ask, is for you to sincerely read this open-mindedly and truly listen to what I’m saying and see what I am pointing to.

Think of these seeming experiences/occurrences:

Waking, sleeping, dreaming, imagining.

I know I have mentioned this many times but let’s once again talk about what they have in common:

They all have the same substance which is no substance, no tangibility, they are empty. Yet they all have the same “source” being “THAT”. Without giving label and meaning to “dreaming” or any of those other seeming phenomenon, all there is is this Awareness / Knowingness.

See it (what I have been pointing to since starting this page) directly, don’t take my words for “truth” without Knowing directly yourself…

Without labels and concepts, what am I left with?

What is aware of being aware?

See without labelling. Without labelling what is happening?

If I remove all use of language, what is?

“IT” is the only thing that always IS considering those occurrences above are nothing but discontinuous appearances, “THAT” is the only “continuity”.

“There must be something continuous to register discontinuity” - nisargadatta

“THAT” is experiencing itself “THAT”. It is the only constant in anything that you claim to have experienced. Yet there is actually no experience or happening, as at their “source” there is only “THAT” / Silence / Nothingness.

You just give xyz experience meaning and label. But it is all just an empty appearance. And what is an “experience”? Isn’t “everything” an experience… your dream from last night, you reading this now and when imagining something? They’re all One and the Same - equally illusionary / dreamlike / empty. “THAT” is the only thing you are always “left with”, that always IS. You’re the only one who labels things as “different” or “separate” 🤷‍♀️ They never were.

P.S. “Continuous” and “constant” not in the sense there is something continually existing or occurring over a period of time because “ “ just is, without beginning or end, there is nothing to continue from anything, its just a word for the sake of this post 😅

All depends on YOU, but YOU depend on nothing:

1) Because you are One with All that there seems to be, it is all YOU / nothingness (nameless and formless) appearing as “something” (with a seeming name and form).

2) Because there is nothing actually there to depend on.

3) Because YOU exist unconditionally and eternally, you just ARE, a “presence” with no beginning or end. Just wow, Your ineffable being truly cannot be grasped nor explained in words.

When you turn clay into a pot, you can call it a pot but it is still always clay. The clay can be without a pot, but the pot cannot be without clay.

You can call a wave a wave, but it is always the ocean. The ocean can be without waves, but the wave cannot be without the ocean.

So, we know there is no separation or duality. There never was one.

Everything is instant, you are limitless:

Lift your arm up for me now. Did it involve strenuous effort? Did it take a long time to do so? Or do you just Know you can just lift your hand and decide to do so?

It is the same for all seeming experiences. Just an instant Knowing. And you Know that as “THAT”, you are limitless and formless (hence this play you have divulged yourself in so much you thought it to be tangibly real).

Since you KNOW yourself to be limitless and infinite (so much so that any word to describe YOU would be limiting YOU) and there being no separation or duality since it is all “THAT/YOU”, all equally empty and seeming, then…. that’s it. You are ALWAYS experiencing yourself Now, no effort and no delay.

You are infinite, who tells you what is or isn’t possible? Everything is natural and effortless because it is all “ “, all YOU and “ “ is all that there is. Every (seeming) “experience” is always “ “ Now !!

There is nothing to make “appear” because there is nothing that is “disappearing” or “appearing”; there is nothing to “change” or “transform” because there was never anything actually there to “change” or “transform”. “Everything” just IS Now because it is always just all YOU / “THAT”.

This is NOT a method for “desires”. If you take it as such then …. Good luck. This is literally what you ARE, everything is YOU. How do you KNOW you exist? These are just empty words pointing to your true being, simply see where they are pointing !!

And by Now —> “Now is not a moment in time, sandwiched between two vast spaces of the past and future. This present Now is the only Now there is - the eternal Now. It has not come from anywhere and is not going anywhere.” - Rupert Spira

“ “ is all that there is.

That is the “conclusion” you will always arrive at. But of course there is actually no conclusion and no human to reach anything.

This is just a subtle noticing / remembrance (no aha moment or magical revelation) of that which always IS. That which you always have been, always are. but fooled yourself into thinking otherwise… only to realise that nothing had ever happened.

“You” have read and consumed enough, you have suffered enough, you have overthought and over-complicated enough, you have tried enough, you have victimised yourself enough. See “THAT” which always is, Now. Go beyond concepts and labels. No one can or will “do it” for you, for there are no others. There is no one to decide but You… You are all that there is. You choose, you decide.

Much love 🤍

little doodle

Hii! I get quite confused by some things. There's nothing to do, because there's no one to do it, right? Everything is in me/I am I. I don’t understand what it would be like to “turn inward” when I am already THAT, or “realize”. What should I "notice"? If there is no agent, what should I watch out for? I would like to free myself from this burden.

I have the feeling that there is still something missing, a moment when everything becomes clear. I have read and heard that this moment does not exist, so why should I “turn inward”?

Stay safe, and thank you!

Hello!

When we say turn inward, it's just to call your attention towards the core of every appearance. " ". Nothing. Which "appears" to be something. If you already understand that there is no entity, and nothing to watch out for, then stop looking for anything more. Sink in this moment itself, because "THIS" is all there is, and all that can ever be.

The feeling of something missing is just that, a FEELING. And every doubt you have is just that, a THOUGHT. Happening to no one. If you already understand that, then just let everything be. Don't seek. Don't search.

Stay right where you are. Just..Be. Exist. Notice how throughout everything, you're always just BEING.

HWANG Method - Entering the Void

Entering the void, astral projection, and lucid dreaming are completely natural experiences. They are not something foreign to you but rather innate abilities that have always been within you, waiting to be remembered. All you need is concentration, faith, and practice.

Each person may experience this process differently, but the key is to trust that the void is your natural state. You don’t have to force anything—just allow it to happen.

Step 1: Deep Relaxation

Before you begin, find a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed. You can be lying down, sitting, or in any position that feels comfortable to you.

Close your eyes and start breathing slowly and deeply. As you inhale and exhale, mentally repeat affirmations that help you release stress and relax your body:

"I am so relaxed."

"My body feels as light as a feather."

"I release all the stress of the day."

"Each breath takes me deeper."

Focus on the sensations. Feel how, with each exhalation, your body releases tension, as if you were dissolving into the air.

If your mind starts to wander, simply observe your thoughts without judgment and gently bring your attention back to your breathing.

Step 2: Setting Your Intention

Once you are deeply relaxed, it’s time to set your intention. This is crucial because your mind needs a clear direction to guide the experience.

Tell yourself with conviction:

"Tonight, I will enter the void."

"I will have a lucid dream with complete clarity."

"I will detach from my physical body and explore beyond it."

It’s not just about repeating words—it’s about feeling what you are affirming. Your intention is the key that unlocks the door to the void.

Step 3: Affirmations of Connection

Now that your intention is set, start affirming your presence in this natural state. Repeat mentally or out loud:

"I AM."

"I am pure consciousness."

"This is my natural state."

"Being in the void is natural for me."

"I AM the void."

"I AM power."

"There is no separation between me and the all."

These affirmations should feel authentic. Even if, at first, it seems like you’re just repeating words, over time, you will start to believe them and experience them as truth.

Imagine that each affirmation is like a key unlocking new dimensions within you.

Symptoms (or Lack of Symptoms) During the Transition

As you enter this state, you may begin to feel physical and energetic sensations. Some of them may include:

A feeling of extreme heaviness or absolute lightness

Vibrations throughout your body

A sensation of falling or floating

A buzzing or ringing in your ears

Pressure in your head or chest

An increased heart rate

The feeling that something is "pulling" you away from your physical body

However, it is also possible to enter the void without experiencing any symptoms at all. Some people transition smoothly without physical sensations, simply finding themselves in the void effortlessly.

Both experiences are valid—whether you feel sensations or not, trust that the process is working.

If any sensation becomes too intense, simply relax even more and surrender to the process.

Remember: the void is your natural state. There is nothing to fear.

Extra Tip

A useful trick to help detach from your physical body is to visualize your hands moving in your mind. Imagine yourself lifting them, touching your surroundings, feeling textures.

This technique can make it easier to separate and take the final step into the experience.

Additional Elements

If you wish, you can enhance the method with:

Relaxing music or ambient sounds

Subliminal audios with affirmation messages

Binaural frequencies that induce altered states of consciousness

There are no strict rules on what to use, but the most important thing is that your attention always returns to your breathing.

Final Advice

If at any moment you feel fear or uncertainty, remember that you are in control. The void is not something external—it is a part of you.

Trust the process.

Let go without forcing anything.

Remember that this is natural for you.

Once you complete these steps, you will have entered the void. From there, you can experience the universe in ways you never imagined.

- Good luck. I love you, hwangeter.

Why do i feel so real

Why do dreams feel so real

Isn’t a relief to realise that the only THING standing in your way is Yourself I’ll repeat that

Isn’t it a relief to realise that the only THING standing in your way is yourself I’ll repeat that again

Isn’t it a A freaking relief to realise that the only THING standing in your way is yourself !

There is no obstacles to overcome no trauma to heal , no one and nothing holding you back

Stop fighting Ghosts these are illusions

It’s time to freaking celebrate at last you have returned home , where you’ve always been.

CR of the picture: Realitywarpingg

Namkha's Search (part 1)

Namkha was a restless soul, always seeking something greater, something beyond the ordinary. He had heard stories of enlightenment, of a truth so grand and mind-blowing that it would change everything. And so, he set out on a journey, determined to find this ultimate truth.

His journey led him across lands and through countless teachings. He read sacred texts, debated with scholars, and practiced every form of meditation he could find. Yet, no matter where he looked, the truth seemed to avoid him. It was always just out of reach, like a mirage in the desert.

One day, while wandering through the empty steppes, Namkha encountered an old guide with deep, calm eyes that seemed to see through everything. The guide walked alongside Namkha for a while, listening to him speak of his endless search.

"I seek the ultimate truth," Namkha said, his voice filled with both hope and frustration. "I want to find something so profound, so extraordinary, that it will transform me completely."

The guide smiled gently, his expression calm. "You are searching for something grand and mind-blowing, but what you seek is not found in noise or grandiosity. The truth is subtle, quiet, ever-present. It does not shout; it whispers."

Namkha shook his head. "But I’ve studied so much, practiced so hard. Surely, the truth must be something extraordinary, something that will strike me like lightning."

The guide’s smile didn’t waver. "The truth is already here, within you. It is not something to be found through endless searching or consuming more and more knowledge. It is found in silence, in stillness. But you must be willing to listen to that silence, to be with it, and to let go of your endless quest."

Namkha was not convinced. "How can the truth be so simple? I need to keep searching. There must be more, something I haven’t discovered yet, something beyond all of this."

The guide’s eyes softened with understanding, but he said no more. He knew that Namkha had to come to this realization on his own. And so, he simply walked with Namkha in silence, his presence calm and steady.

Namkha, however, could not rest. He continued his search, driven by the need to find something big, something that would finally satisfy his restless mind. He traveled farther, studied harder, meditated longer, but still, the truth remained just out of reach, always distant, always fleeting.

As the years passed, Namkha grew sick and tired. His body aged, his mind became tired, but his search never brought him the satisfaction he was looking for. He had consumed countless teachings, filled his mind with endless knowledge, but it all felt empty, like trying to grasp smoke.

One day, exhausted and defeated, Namkha found himself back on the same steppes where he had met the guide years ago. To his surprise, the guide was still there, sitting quietly under a tree, as if he had never left.

Namkha approached him, his heart heavy with the weight of his unsuccessful search. "I’ve done everything," he said, his voice filled with hopelessness. "I’ve searched everywhere, but I’m still lost. I don’t know what to do anymore."

The guide looked at Namkha with the same calm eyes, and after a long pause, he spoke. "The truth you seek cannot be found in more searching, more texts, or more effort. It is in the silence that you have ignored, the stillness you have avoided. The truth is not a thing to be found, but the realization of what has always been—your own Self, beyond all thoughts and ideas."

Namkha look at the guide for a long time. He finally fell silent, his mind too tired to argue. He sat down beside the guide and, for the first time, he simply listened to the silence around him. The wind whispered through the trees, the leaves rustled gently, and in that stillness, something within him began to shift.

As Namkha sat in silence, he felt the restless waves of his mind start to settle. The need to search, to grasp, to find something outside of himself began to fade. In the quiet, he started to realize that the truth he had been searching for was not something distant or grand, but something that had always been within him—something so simple, so subtle, that it could only be found in the absence of all seeking.

In that moment, Namkha understood. The truth was not in the endless texts or the complex philosophies. It was in the silence, in the stillness of his own being. The truth was himself, his own true nature, the Self that is ever-present, ever-whole.

The guide smiled, seeing the change in Namkha’s eyes. "The way was never about finding something outside of you. It was about realizing what has always been here, within you. The Self is not something to be attained; it is what you are. All you need to do is be still and know."

And in that silence, Namkha knew he was home.

All things you consider real, such as circumstances, material things and quite literally anything else, are just concepts. They hold no meaning other than the meaning you give to them. And even then, it's all an illusion - like a lie you keep repeating over and over to yourself. Reinforcing it until you're blinded by your own creation. There is no duality, it's all non-dual. It's all "nothing" appearing as something, yet when you reassess that something you realize it's just...nothing - baseless, and faceless. The only thing that can ever be classified as "real", is the one thing that's always present, constant, and never-changing. It's Awareness. It's You. It's your truth, your home and your throne. You seek it, without acknowledging it's already there. You lock yourself behind bars, forgetting you have the key. If only you'd just look within, take a glance, or even just peek. You'd realize you aren't your beliefs, thoughts and feelings, you aren't your favorite color or name, you aren't even your body or brain. You are what's left once you strip it all away.