Yes, I Was Late. But Maybe, It Was Worth The Wait. ~ark

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~ark

How to convince myself

To try again

When trying

Only brings regret

Longing for words

To be enough

But words are lost within

Vacant smiles

Insincerity

Hiding behind corners

My faults shining

Showing others

I’m empty

To be Known, To be Lost

I broke free Too tired to survive in monotony Too tired of being recognised, known to anybody.  The urge to just disappear lingered,  To become a part of something new,  To feel new, to dissolve, to be lost completely. 

But in the process of, Filtering myself to feel unique, Escaping to gain my own autonomy, The desire to belong, My willingness to surrender, Made me realise that I was nothing more than a selfish body. Transient beings, their desires - ugly.  To be bound, to be known, to be contradictory.  I confined myself to have nothing, But a fleeting identity.    

People are finding the love of their life online, and I can't even find the right answer to my assignment questions.

Either praise or curse,

I just wished for some words.

From your throat to my ears,

Something to know that you see my efforts.

"People empty me. I have to get away to refill."

– Charles Bukowski

What else should I say?

~ark

Diminishing Hope

I let myself suffer,

With intentions that were never pure.

Standing at the piedmont of growth,

I felt my feet frozen, unable to move anywhere.

My eyes scanned both the ways,

Walking onto which, my survival would be declared.

Afraid of the extremes,

I chose to never try, I turned away with shun ears.

Lacking the courage to fight for my life,

I stood freezing gradually, I faced my fears.

Melting by the newly found energy,

I became essential, drops of water to be shared.

Known to the fact of being fatal,

I returned from my illusions unreal.

In the diminishing hope of reality,

My pain defined me,

The master of my endless prayers.

~ark

Some scars needn't be visible, they ache in memory.

Her Tree

The building lit by the sun’s glare, People walking through the aisles, I gazed through the window, Thoughts pouring in my mind. The sky embellished with clouds, Curtained the sun time by time. The glare slowly took over, They drifted further over miles. Seeking shelter from the truth’s glare, I hid under the tree of lies. Covered by the shade, I still scorched in my feelings inter wined.

And then, the tree fell and the glare too. I burned in the flames I ignited. I lay on my ashes, As I slowly trapped myself in the darkness of night. Returning from its exile, The sun emerged piercing my veins, I smiled as I watered a tree, The roots hidden in the soil of the avenges’ reign.

~ark